~ AUGUST 6th Weekly Session ~ 2008 ~
For this BPD BOOK STUDY SESSION,
WE will go over pages 61 - 65, which provides examples of individuals with BPD who use projection.
This will be a week-long BOOK STUDY Session, so that you may come back here all week long to check in and add your input, comments, questions, and findings.
In our last BOOK STUDY SESSION, WE asked the question . . .
How can people with BPD deny that they are projecting when it is so obvious to everyone else?
One way that a person with BPD can project onto you is to accuse you of having feelings and thoughts that really belong to them.
Let us take a look at the EXAMPLE of Ellen (BP) ~ Borderline Personality - [SEE Page 61] . . .
Ellen (BP)
When I accused my psychiatrist of hating me and telling me to "snap out of it," it was because I hated myself and I wished that I could snap out of it. My deepest fears and feelings of self-hatred were those I would project onto someone else because they were too frightening and disturbing to acknowledge within myself.
QUESTION: How can people with BPD deny that they are projecting when it is so obvious to everyone else?
The answer is that shame and splitting may combine with projection and denial to make the "Tag, You're It" defense mechanism a more powerful way of denying ownership of unpleasant thoughts and feelings. [WE previously discussed the "Tag, You're It" concept in our earlier BOOK STUDY SESSION].
QUESTION: How does this process, which can take place in only a few seconds, work?
Some people with BPD feel shame ~ defective at the core of their being. Like everyone else, people with BPD have negative feelings, behaviors, and traits. But because of splitting ~ black-and-white thinking ~ they often deny any flaws, because that would make them less than perfect. And if they are not perfect, they are worthless. Projection then completes the picture.
THE BPD LOGIC GOES LIKE THIS . . .
There seems to be a problem. It is not my fault. Therefore, the problem must be YOURS.
[SEE Pages 61 - 62]
More adult examples of projection and projective identification ~ (pages 62 - 63) . . . TO BE ADDED THIS WEEK HERE in Artistic Therapy.
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*NOTE: This BOOK STUDY BPD THERAPY SESSION can be done at your leisure this week, and you can come back here at any time to add your questions, comments, thoughts, examples, and input!
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Comments: 16 ( 1 removed by René Allen )
Blessings ~
Rene
Did the woman get convicted? I'll have to do more research on BPD to discover if there are other cases like this.
Thank you for adding this information.
Blessings ~
Rene
BOOK STUDY BPD DISCUSSION SESSION ~ June 11th
ENJOY!
WE have a few members here in Artistic Therapy who have relayed their tales to us of personal experiences with both Bi-Polar and BPD cases -- as well as hearing personal and profound stories of battles with both diagnoses.
On a human dynamics level it is fascinating to hear of the VICTORIES ~ and there are many! WE have many VICTORY STORIES right here in this Group.
Many genius minds have battled with one form of mental illness or another.
It is when a person recognizes the disorder and seeks to come to terms with alignment of the mind, body and soul. In most cases, it is a spiritual intervention that takes place and leads to VICTORY.
Blessings ~
Rene
I apologize for missing this study, however I had some things going on and have not been able to be on Gather as much as I previously was.
I also find this part of the book study very interesting and am wondering if a person that is projecting and playing the "tag you're it" game continues the behavior for a certain amount of time or if they eventually stop. Do they stop ONLY when the problem is realized and admitted or do they continue until something else occupies their mind and behavior?
I know the behavior can escalate into "distortion campaigns" (Chapter 11) and things can become out of control quickly. I find it discouraging to realize this can even continue after a person removes themselves from a relationship with someone demonstrating BPD qualities.
no distortion needed, the actions vs. the recorded statements bear out the facts, even without input from the male side.
You've mentioned that you have a two-fold question regarding the person that is projecting and playing the "tag you're it" game . . .
1) If the behavior continues for a certain amount of time or if they eventually stop?
2) Do they stop ONLY when the problem is realized and admitted or do they continue until something else occupies their mind and behavior?
These would be good questions for Paul Mason and Randi Kreger.
Some of our membership here can also answer these questions, as many of our membership have had up close and personal experiences with individuals and family members who have Borderline Personality Disorder.
Personally, with the BPD individuals that I have experienced, I've yet to see complete healing. I've seen a change of behavior for short periods of time, and then a return to the Borderline Personality Disorder behavior. Sometimes with extreme lashing out ~ blaming, accusing, screaming . . .
I believe that if the individuals that I've encountered would spend consistent time in a church setting (i.e., going to church services regularly, getting involved in church activities and auxiliaries) that they would do much better ~ if not be completely healed of their BP behavior pattern. In fact, there should be a study done on this to document the outcome. -- Those who receive traditional therapy and those who receive spiritual therapy.
Chapter 11 gets into "distortion campaigns" as you've mentioned Renda, ~ and this too I have seen with BPD individuals.
And yes, "distoration campaigns" do continue even after a person removes themselves from a relationship with someone demonstrating BPD behavior patterns.
I believe that the psyche has a way of being healthy given the right environment and the right help. -- This happens when I person really wants to help theirself to overcome any BPD behavior patterns.
I also believe that there are some people who insist upon dwelling on the past and also dwelling on and perpetuating the distortions of their mind.
WE must also not discount the factors of self-pity, and those BP individuals who simply cannot find it within them to forgive. ~ FORGIVE theirself, and forgive others for any perceived misgivings.
I've also found that most of the BPD individuals that I have encountered have a high level of jealousy and envy directed at the persons that they lash out at. I'd like to hear from others if this is also the case with the BPD individuals that they have come in contact with.
Renda ~ You've mentioned the discouragement that may occur with those who would like to see the BPD individual get better ~ and thinking that their removal may help ~ only to find that the behavior continues. The best that a person can do in these cases is to pray for the individual with the Borderline Personality Disorder ~ because most people find that the BP insists upon holding on to their BPD.
Your thoughts would be appreciated, and all of the thoughts of our Members here in the Group.
Good questions you've brought up Renda.
Thank you for your input.
I suppose all in all, it goes back to the fact that anyone having behavioral symptoms such as these are much like those with addictions. They will only find resolution when they come to the point of accepting the problem and WANTING to change their behaviors.
The Study would be great! It would really be beneficial to so many. I wish I had the time to really immerse myself in a Study of this nature.
Thanks for bringing this topic up Renda.
Your Friend,
Rene
there are over ten megabytes of 'journaled' emails on my server for legal reasons.
you know what, in the final analysis they end up saying? I haven't looked at them for quite awhile, so I am working from memory here
'this doesn't look like it's going to be any fun'. which is a far cry from 'you won't have to be alone, (at your Mothers death), unless you want to be'. and in my case I was. you want to talk about BPD returning, how about it being ACTIVATED by the actions of someone so selfish that lying the way in, "I am not a picky person" thru, "(see quote about alone above)", and out "I'll NEVER marry again" posted to Gather and anyone who would listen.. and BEGIN a new relationship within WEEKS of cutting ties by standing up the persdon she'd told the things above.
sigh all you want... THAT is not something to be ignored.
there is living in the past, and there is active resistance/accountability to the type of person that has a 'but I've always gotten away with it before in my four marriages and gawd nose how many relationships!' attitude.
No one is much reading this stuff anymore, in part I think because of the punitive tone toward those AFFLICTED.
be well.