Breaking News!!! 5 Gatherites on VP Short List

I know that this is hush hush, but I found a manila folder in a shopping cart at Big Lots and what was inside was a short list of possible VP choices. I'm not sure which candidate it is for, but I was rather startled to see some names of people in Gather I know on it. Besides each name was either reasons the person was rejected, or the reason this person had made the short list. I will share this information with you. Who knows, we just might have a Gather member as our next VP just a heartbeat away from the oval office.

Those that did not make the short list and reasons why:

Ann C. - Gets too excited. Probably would want too much petty cash for buying Poise Pads and she's a blond.

John Doyle - Likes to show views of the Moon, but does so only from car windows.

Heather W - Goes ape when she sees a bonfire and is known as the bonfiremonkee.

Tanya P - Wants to help citizens get medical insurance for paranormal experiences.

Marie J R - Says bless you to everyone except when they sneeze.

Chick J - Very indecisive about using italics or bold when signing checks.

Samantha B - Unable to locate because her sign says she's always out for the day.

Kerrell g - Will only use 7 dirty words and that's just not enough.

Sheila h - Will only admire her own mud and is just too fastidious on the campaign trail.

Toni V - Says she wants the country to move in the direction of a GPS.

Deb d - Wants to give camp logs instead of tax refund checks to citizens.

Jules - Wants tropical transplants in the Heartland and there is fear this may include imports of Cuban cigars and possibly Greyhound races with buses instead of dogs.

Sandi - Keeps asking, ‘Should we be worried?' at each diner on the campaign trail.

Janet B - Asks too many hypothetical true and false questions about Italian/Irish people.

Kimberly Ripley - Wants to set up a fund to bring back disco dancing.

Elizabeth (Bob) - Wants mud wrestling to be a required academic subject at Public Schools.

Alison - Wants a law that requires anyone playing a fiddle to wear a blue dress.

Curt L - Wants military satellites to find yard sales in whatever vicinity he is in.

Wilma - Wants her Eats and Runs chef to be the White House chef for visiting dignitaries and Heads of State.

Elsie Duggan - Although qualified, might cause war with Canada over dandelion exports.

THE SHORT LIST

Dan h - Rousing speech to waitresses at Hooters used a great campaign slogan: ‘Our goal is to help further your exposure.'

Deloris Wright - Showed great military prowess by stating, ‘I have been fighting the battle of the bulge.'

Donald (Norma) - Donald makes good cabinets and the next prez will need a good cabinet after what the current Bozo has done.

Marge - She can help lower the crime rate because of her Dr. Dolittle ability to talk to llama who are well known for detective work.

Ruthe M - She said, 'I have peach cobbler in the making.' This will assure victory in the Georgia and South Carolina vote unless they use electronic voting machines borrowed from Florida.