It's Not Your Cooking - Your Kid Is Just A Racist

The London- based National Children's Bureau has revealed a shocking discovery. However, it's a discovery I've always suspected myself. It turns out that toddlers who turn down flavorful foreign food "may be exhibiting racist behavior." 

For years children have turned their noses up to my flavorful dishes such as corned beef and cabbage and numerous potato and cabbage based recipes. I've always known there was something wrong with those children. Normal children should love my cooking.

Thanks to the recent study in the UK I now know that it has nothing to do with my cooking, those children in fact, are racists. I feel so much better about that. It is their problem and not mine. While it is disturbing to admit that my own children may be racists, it is a much simpler answer as to why any child could actually turn down my delicious corned beef and cabbage recipes. I began making these dishes so that my children woulld learn to embrace their Irish-American heritage. I'm shocked to see that just the opposite has occurred.

However, I've always suspected my children hated white people. Now I have evidence to back it up. In fact, now that I think about it, from a very young age my children have preferred Italian food, while rejecting traditional white people food such as whatever that yellow baby food is. Is it any coincidence that my now teenage son is dating an Italian girl and totally ignoring the girl with a clearly Irish background who pines for him so?

Clearly racism runs rampant in my family. I suspect this extends into politics as well. Hopefully, they will expand their study because I have a theory that taste and political preference may also be related. My sister's son has been complaining about the fact I make him eat Bush's Baked Beans for years. Clearly the child is a going to a democrat. I'm so glad I have this study to help me understand more clearly what I've suspected all along. I'm going to have to sit her down and explain to her that she needs to feed him more Republican food to give him the right political balance.

Never again will I despair when people turn down my stuffed cabbage or stuffed green peppers. I'll just have to accept that they hate white people. I can't do anything about that.

Myself, I just discovered that I hate Mexicans. This is odd because I've had many friends of Mexican descent. But I guess the first thing racists do is try to tell everyone they aren't racist because they have Mexican friends.  However, I absolutely hate Taco Bell. Actually now that I think about it, I guess it just means  I hate fake Mexicans because Taco Bell isn't really Mexican.

I'm also bothered by the fact that I love Chinese food. I eat it all the time. I guess that makes me a communist.

I guess I'll have to stop here. Clearly, I have a lot of soul searching to do.


This is meant to be a humorous look at the original topic found at (http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=upiUPI-20080707-122008-1071&show_article=1)