"Thanks, I Needed That"

This was the day that I had dreaded for four months, I had known that I would be so sad, that I would want to cry and wail at the heavens.

I awoke slowly, and just could not get with things, I followed my daily routine and tried to shut my mind off of the event that was supposed to be, I took little notice that the heat index was supposed to 108 today, just like yesterday, and just like tomorrow. Who cares, I thought.

I folded the clothes, I let the cats play in the empty basket, but I just couldn't laugh at their antics, like I usually did.

I got on my computer and all I could do was just check my e-mail, I deleted most of it without reading the first line, nothing could hold my interest. How was I going to make it though this day, I wondered?

Thank goodness that the time to get ready for work had finally arrived. Lord I needed a diversion. I really needed something to hold my attention.

I got busy and put myself together, and the chore was calming, it almost got my mind off of the thoughts. I picked up my name-tag, and while I was pinning it on, my mind flew to the little guardian angle pin that I would next put on to my uniform. We share this, I thought to myself, Morgan and I would forever be connected by this little pin.

I slowly walked over to my husband's desk and gave him a kiss. Being his always loving self, he cautioned me to take things slow, and to not overwork myself. Bless his heart, he has no clue that hard work is sometimes a balm to a woman's soul!

As I got to my front porch, I stopped and looked at the little tree we had planted to remember our grand daughter, Morgan. Today was supposed to be her birthday. I teared up and whispered, "It's OK, Granny loves you baby."

Just as I said these words, I heard a rustling down in the little hedges at my feet. I looked down and there sat a little brown bird. I clucked at the little thing and said. "Are you hurt little one?"

I swear to all that is Holy, that little bird jumped up on my porch and sat between my feet, cocked it's little head and looked me in the eye.

I was so worried that it was wounded that I moved to call my husband, (we do have two cats and five dogs) and the bird hopped down to the ground. By the time I got Roger outside the little thing had flown off.

I have always believed in angels and if I had known that God was going to send me one, I would have been a little more receptive to his message! How blind we sometimes make ourselves. We could see so much more if we just let our hearts and mind open up!

No matter what anyone will say, I know that God and Morgan knew my pain and I was sent a message.

"Thanks, God, I needed that!!"

Judy Kiser © 7/12/01