Today is my birthday... and I am DAMN grateful to be here.

I will admit I have been celebrating my birthday for eight days already.  Oh, it wasn't really my fault.  A dear friend's birthday is ten days before mine, so we had a two-couple potluck in which we hugged each other a lot, exchanged gifts and felt like princess brides as our husbands catered to us.  They are both the type of guy who would rather play a game of squash than socialize this way, but they are class acts.  For that night they behaved in what we both considered a highly civilized fashion. 

Although I am not usually about material gifts, this year I bought her a beautiful blown glass vase from Poland. Her mouth dropped open and she said, "Oh Elizabeth!" in such a way, I felt giddy with delight.  I am usually not extravagant, and this is one year when we have less than usual.  It seemed almost irresponsible to indulge myself in this way.  In self-defense it was on sale, so like a crazy Papua New Guinean, I increased my joy by giving what I couldn't afford.   You know exactly what I am talking about.  Admit it.  You have done it too.

Then a few days ago another dear friend and I planned a dinner out.   To my surprise she picked up the dinner tab.  Her daughter was due with her very first grandchild - lovely baby boy, Henry, was born on Tuesday.

"I wanted to do something for your birthday," she said.  "I know it's early, but with the baby coming, I don't know what my schedule will be like." 

This friend's amazing strength is hidden behind her gracious southern belle personality.  She has survived everything from leukemia to a bone marrow transplant to a divorce.  Yet when you are in her company all you feel is how interested she is in everything you have to say and how positively she views life.   She is the gift that keeps on giving.

Fortunate enough to have siblings, three of them are sisters.  One lives in southern California.  I live in Southwest Washington, but we still talk to each other every day.  Okay, so sometimes we even talk a couple times a day, but life gets tough.  What better person to spill all my problems to than my older sister?  Oh, and when I tell her about my little triumphs, she is my greatest cheerleader.  Sometimes we get grumpy with each other, but our ability to forgive and move on astonishes people who don't understand the bond real sisters share.  In case you wondered, I am there for her too.  This gift, being of use, is as special as life gets.

My artist friend, who used to be my art teacher, begged me to visit her this week at her beach house.

"I'll be alone from Sunday through Wednesday, so come anytime.  I know you are dieting," she said sweetly.  "But I promise we won't eat anything that you can't have." 

Yes, one of the negatives (or maybe a positive?) of staying with her?   She not only wants to share all her favorite restaurants with you but grab pizza and a bottle of wine in between.  We would sculpt or paint while I was there... but I do work for a living and after this birthday I must admit to being a 'grown-up'. 

A teacher, she has summers off, but summers are my heaviest work season.  Of course she understands, which is a gift in and of itself.  I probably won't go.  Why?  Because I have air conditioning and she doesn't.  This time of year even the beaches in Washington are too warm for me.

So why am I so happy and so grateful to be here other than the obvious of having healthy children and grandkids?  The last six months  I have been attempting to meet some self-set goals.  By my birthday this year I wanted to accomplish some very defined goals.

1) Compile and organize all my short stories, begin rewriting, editing and fine-tuning my absolute favorites. 
2) Organize my memoir pieces into a folder and put it into some sort of chronological order, later to be refined into a serious piece of work.  My children are pushing me to do this, but I have some concerns.  They may still be too young to read the finished product as it may be rated for sex and violence.  (Just kidding?)
3) Focus on finishing at least one of the four screenplay ideas I have, each of which is already three-quarters written and way over the preferred 180 page length.  (Sigh.)
4) Start the revisions of at least one of my two semi-finished novels, balancing some of the depressing 'Angela Ashes' passages with some 'David Sedaris' style chapters in one of them and deciding whether to change my protagonist to American in the other.  (Yes, the latter is a romance novel, so sue me.)
5) Get serious about organizing all my work so that:
    a) I will be ready to pursue and actually land an agent  and
    b) Ultimately get a decent publisher.

Okay, so I have managed to accomplish 1), 2) and 5) above.  Maybe by my next birthday I will be able to tell you I have representation.  If nothing else, my husband will be thrilled to get the boxes and folders stored back in the garage.:)

I am most grateful to be alive to enjoy my friends, family and all of you.   Yes, my amazing friends on Gather, YOU have been my greatest advocates, my confidantes, my inspiration and seemingly unending validation.  My family thanks you too, as they were getting pretty sick of my entreaties which were variations on, "Please, please, please can't you just read one more story?". 

Without your comments, emails, articles, validation, and enduring friendship, I would feel much less confident that I am worth publishing.  Now I think, even a good agent would be lucky to get me, right?  Naw... but maybe by Thanksgiving.:)

A sincere thank you and if you are so moved, send me some birthday hugs.:)  I just love you guys.