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by
Bill's Spirit
Member since:
March 3, 2006 Speaking of News....
June 06, 2008 07:52 AM EDT
(Updated: June 06, 2008 08:06 AM EDT)
views: 175
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comments: 41
A Wellfleet, Massachusets lighthouse was recently found on a beach in California. Wellfleet folks had thought the lighthouse destroyed in 1925. When asked for comment, the lighthouse responded "Well, Wellfleet was a great town; but Man, I just couldn't stand there facing east anymore. All that pressure of 'the day ahead' blasting me in the face every morning. Whewww... So I snuck out here where I could watch the sun set every day. 'Cause Man, that is so-o-o Cool." -- -- Doctors recently removed a surgical towel from a man in Japan. The patient was undergoing surgery for what was thought to be a tumor when Doctors discoverd that a surgical towel had been left inside the man when he had surgery some twenty-five years earlier for an ulcer. Upon removal, doctors rinsed the towel, wrung it dry, and then shook it out. Seems it was still capable of mopping up spills and cleaning up messes. Yup, it was a Brawny. -- -- Continental Airlines Cuts Employees and Retires Airplanes Personally, I think that's kind of sadistic. I'd rather that the employees had been retired and the airplanes had been cut. -- -- Home foreclosures set a record in the first quarter. What I'm trying to figure out is who these homes are foreclosing on, and how exactly do you get in debt to your house in the first-place? Is it blackmail? Did the house say, "I saw what you were doing in your bedroom last night, you disgusting naughty human. If you don't get started on that sun-room addition I've been asking for, your days are numbered." -- -- A homeless man in Philadelphia apparently swindled more than $100,00 from 13 women. The man presented himself as a Grammy-nominated record mogul looking for investors in a new DVD, CD. video manufacturing enterprise. He met the women on a web site known as MillionaireMatch.com. You'd think that most of us would have long ago learned NOT to send money to people you meet on the Internet; but this begs the question, what kind of criteria or background check does MillionaireMatch.com do, exactly? Perhaps they should change the name of their site to Maybe-A-Millionaire-Match.com. -- -- A new million dollar reward has been offered to anyone who can provide proof of the existance of a bigfoot or Loch Ness type lake monster. I guess this new reward was needed because legendary fame, exclusive publishing rights and the super sweet movie deals that would come from such a fantastic finding, just haven't been motivational enough. -- -- Thanks to California's recent approval of marriage for gays and lesbians, George Takei (Commander Sulu of the famous original Star Trek series) has scheduled a wedding in September. Walter Koenig (Ensign Chekov) and Nichelle Nichols (Lieutenant Uhura) are expected to be part of the wedding party. Leonard Nimoy (Spock) has been assigned an advisory role in the audience. Wedding planners have advised that anyone showing up in a "Red Shirt" will be stationed around the periphery, and instructed to watch their backs. -- -- America's Army On Drugs Despite the prognosticating of futuristic writers, it turns out that the military will not be trying to improve troop efficiency by hopping them up on performance enhancing drugs. What the military seems to have discoverd, is that the medications troops most need to keep them functional and at their best during our current war, are anti-depressants and anti-anxiety drugs. The anti-depressants help troops overcome the psychological impact of the horrors soldiers have to wade through during war; bloody, deformed corpses of all sizes, ages and stages of decomposition, and those disturbingly unidentifiable pieces-parts that come from human beings when they have been literally blown apart. The anti-anxiety meds are deployed to help soldiers deal with the annoying knowledge that they could be maimed or killed at any moment. Unfortunately, there is no evidence to support the rumor that the current administration is taking their anti-psychotics. -- -- 06 June 2008 -- Bill's Spirit is an Artist, Writer, Poet, Philosopher currently wordsmithing from a humble digital forge in small town Ohio. The works of the man behind Bill's Spirit have been published in small alternative and amateur presses since 1986. Before that, they just filled notebooks, decorated walls and gathered dust in piles and boxes. --
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Comments: 41
Thanks for posting to Make me Laugh
Triple points and Friday!
Doesn't get any better does it?
You'd think the man would have noticed the towel a while ago.
My fav was that the washington suits aren't taking their antipsych meds.
(Bet that is an unsubstantiated rumor!)
Blessed be,
Wilka
The lighthouse story is too weird even in its original form. Why would they move one across the country? Why didn't they just build a new one?
And thanks for your kind comment on my Camp Insanity Journal story.
Triple points for you!!!
Thanks.