Falling Behind Our Parents

I believe it's up to everyone to decide what is more important: to own a house or have a family. I feel that for many callers the financial security is the priority. I myself am pretty happy renting and also enjoying family life. I think it's still possible to have both.

I think that the decline in middle class wealth in the U.S. is attributable to globalization. While that economic policy might be good for business and bring employment opportunities to less developed countries, the globe cannot support an American middle class lifestyle for all the world's nations. Inevitably, globalization will reduce the standard of living for the American middle class while possibly raising it abroad.

One other point is that even though we are falling behind the 1 working spouse, 2 kids and a single family dwelling lifestyle of the 1950s and 60s the current generation has access to goods and services beyond the reach of even the richest Americans from that period. A 1950s lifestyle with a small 1-bathroom house for the whole family, 1 car, few gadgets and less effective medical care might still be affordable today.

I think I am doing a pretty good job for my family.

My wife and I have lived very frugally since we married 30+ years ago - we are OK, so far, but some health problem, or loss of a job would be a disaster. I think that we are at about the same point as each of our parents were at a comparable time in their lives.

However, I am more worried about our two children, both college educated, and working. They are both conservative in spending habits, but find it difficult to save anything significant in relatively low wage jobs.

Everyone should read David Cay Johnston's book: "Free Lunch" to see examples of how government policies, laws, legal decisions and so on have evolved over the past 40 years to direct increasing amounts of money collected from taxpayers to the super-rich and large corporations. This effectively means there is much less tax revenue for maintaining infrastructure, education, crime prevention, social programs, health care and so on. The effective wages of everyone except the top few percent has declined over the past 20 years, so it is no wonder that the present generation is finding it harder to maintain a standard of living that was as comfortable as their parents.

Rich, doing okay, struggling or poor we all tend to generalize economic conditions based on our own situation and the people we associate with (usually people like us). I think that is what Nan is doing. I have 2 children, 35 & 42. I was a professional, they are both professionals. Both are better off than I ever was. Now I'm retired and if you want to try struggling, try being retired. I just got my 1st COLA in 5 years, $11.52/month. I'm not unsympathetic to Nan's situation but the problems with our economy are biting everyone who isn't rich, not just the 20 something to 40 something generation.

I was watching MSNBC over the weekend when they interviewed people from the League of New Voters. Most were saying that they can't afford the American Dream. Several years back I can remember when the statement became "It takes two people working to run one household." Look where we are now. It's gotten much worse. It's why we need a change so bad, not just in our country, but around the world.

...the current generation has access to goods and services beyond the reach of even the richest Americans from that period. A 1950s lifestyle with a small 1-bathroom house for the whole family, 1 car, few gadgets....

Oh, come on. We were well-off in the 1950's. I was a teenager and we owned a three bedroom house, 1500 sq ft. Plenty for our 4 person household which included my stay-at-home grandmother. We had two cars, we had a washing machine, a dryer, and a brand new Mixmaster in the kitchen. We were living totally on my mother's salary as an office worker, she was a WWII widow and never remarried--for that she got a $39/mo. pension.

We had a two-week family vacation every year on which we drove all over the US in our comfortable Buick; stayed in motels and tourist cabins and sometimes tourist rooms with breakfast (forerunner of the more expensive bed and breakfasts) What single income family with a teenager could afford that now????? AND my mother had a savings account, no pension from that job, but did have good health care coverage.

The working class is going downhill and high school graduates can't afford any home except several rooming together with all the betrayal and financial problems that entails.

Corporate and personal greed are at work here and we really don't understand that and keep on wanting more and more toys. One movie per week is entertainment. 8-12 movies a week is an obsession.

I can't believe people are happy to rent and raise a family. You're at the mercy of landlords for your shelter and you are building equity for them. When you own a home, you can always borrow against your equity to take care of you in your old age. Consider it a savings account but don't try to spend phony equity due to ballooning values. Don't count your chickens before they hatch, as my grandma would say.

A generational downgrade for her and millions of twenty and thirty-something Americans who, she says, are falling far behind their parents' standard of living.

What in the world is she talking about?

Do people in their twenties or thirties ACTUALLY think they should be as financially secure at a person twice their age? What kind of lunacy is this?

And what is this absurdity of the "declining middle-class". The greatest downward pressure on the middle-class is exerted by divorce, single-parenthood and retirement - not outsourcing or off-shoring.

I am a parent of the genration Nan is talking about.
I get the sense that she is frustrated by being forced to sacrifice because she was never taught how to sacrifice to get what she wanted.

As an example are the people that graudate from college with student loans greater then their first job paid.

I lived better than my parents, and my kids are living better than their parents.

I married and had children at 19 and am still married. I think the effort involved in maintaining a happy marriage for over 20 years has in effect been a boon to the finances to my husband and myself--not that we do not still live check to check. So did my parents. Nan is a single mother which cannot help her finances any. The percentage of two household families across the county is not likely to improve any time soon, and of course it has affected family finances. Especially those who spent their 20's and 30's living the life and saving/investing nothing before settling down -- 50% of the time w/the wrong person, unfortunately. Spending 20g on a wedding having a baby or two, paying for a divorce all at the half way point to retirement age is no recipe for the american dream of golden years.

I had 2 weeks of family vacations yearly growing up, but I might not had my parents had the cable and cell phone and internet bills that I do each month. Add that up yearly and add in the other upgrades we consider standard these days--not to mention our extensive reliance on processed food. People turn their noses up at the 1200 sqft ranches I and those before me grew up in, and we are convinced we need to do a minimum $15,000 kitchen re-do every 10-15 years. We've gotten what we've paid for--how much interest did our parents and their parents fork out in their life?

Of course we all are going to vote for what we hope is going to lead to better energy for the environment and our wallets, better health care costs, tranparency in the spending of our tax$ and other things that make sense, can be considered true progress and will benefit every income class. But regardless, most of us have ourselves to blame for our own status.

Check out this article:

"How I learned to stop worrying and love the recession"
The market's in a slump and America's heyday is long gone. But I've found comfort in being a coupon clipper.
By Heather Havrilesky

http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2008/04/18/recession/index.html

I know times are tough and I belong to the recession tips group here on Gather. However, I also think standards have changed. Would we feel that we had "fallen behind' our parents if we owned one car, lived in a 2 bedroom home (for four people. including 2 kids - I shared a room with a sister), had a small house that was the norm for middle class families but is called a "starter home" today? We have one television (not three or four), no computers, one typewriter (not electric) and no summer camp. Even so, I felt like we had a great life.

Yes, we are in a recession. Yes, we are falling behind. But I see people going into debt for DISCRETIONARY purchases (the $5000 business suit, the expensive car, the flatscreen tv and granite countertops) and wonder.....

If we had to live as well as our parents did (in the 50s), well...many people actually do live better than that. Many have at least one computer, more than one television, own a home (although that home may seem a burden now),etc. They don't save as much as many one-income families did in the 50s.

HOWEVER, we also have spiraling health care costs, high gas prices, inflation, a recession, food prices that are insane....etc.

I've known this for about the last 30 years. Not only have I been behind my parents but many I have known. Of course, there are those who grew up in a Hood who rose to affluence through education. But most who grew up affluent are not to the same standard. I am talking Boston and suburbs. I don't know of ANYONE who is of the same level as their parents. A few are beyond it - but that is because they grew up in a Hood; aisde from those, those of us who grew up with affluence - do not have the same level of it or are vastly downgraded from that.

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My daughter is 26 and works at a low paying social service job. She rents an apartment in an old house near the U and bikes to work, though I just co-signed a loan for her first car, a Honda with over 100,000 miles.

How I envy her.

the falling behind syndrome is complex. For many young people, it has to do with debt load. When you graduate from college owing 20 to 40 thousand, it is tough. Grad school? You better get a really good job if you plan to pay that off.

Young people who are going to enter low pay professions simply cannot incur debt. If they go there, disaster awaits them.

Very interesting!

I wonder what is living better than yuor parents. THe point about the higher health costs as example, the treatemtns and medicines available now that ocst so much more were avaible when Nan was a child, at best I suspect that only one daughter and neither parent swoudl be around because of the improvements in medicince in the last 30 years. THe cost is up but we are surviving longer and with better health, who is living better the parents or the child?
We had a phone, now they have cell phones, we had rabbit ears for te TV with 5 stations, now it is cable or dish and HD with 50 stations, who has it better?

The cars and there maintiance was more then, a car that lasted 100,000 miles was rare, now they last three times that, the tire were for 20,000 miles now their for 50,000 even 60,000, multi speaker radios and so on, which is better, then or now?

I think the kids are trying to compare today's stuff with what the think their parents had. They take it out of context and making a fair comparison.

I hate to say it, but they seem preoccupied with comfort and not about enjoying the challenge of getting there.

our parents were expected to avoid massive debt. our children are expected to "keep the economy going" by incurring massive debt. the difference is far from imaginary.

Chris, I'm with you here, my parents we in debt for ONE thing when I was growing up. Their home. We also had 2 week vacations at the beach, but my parents were frugal - not that us kids knew the difference. It would really be a boon if America decided to eat fresh fruit and wholesome food, at the expense of the internet, cell phone and satellite/cable tv companies. If you want to talk about massive unloading of expenses we can live without? Let's try those FIRST. I don't know how many people I've run into in work life, who gripe about the cost of drugs/dentists visits/dr's appointments for the occasional cold - (Average GP visit 90.00) but who fork out 150.00 per month if not more for internet, cable and cell phones... like OUR own parents would have ever been that stupid with their finances? No..........