You Can't Listen And Talk At The Same Time

Face it, you can't talk and listen at the same time when one of your associates, workers, employees (whatever your place of employment calls them).

Working on your listening skills is one of the greatest assets you can develop for yourself and for your organization. This skill alone will carry you further in life than just about anything else you may learn when it comes to connecting with other people.

Instead of passively listen to what someone is saying, engage your mind in the conversation. Actually think about what the person is saying to you. As weird as it sounds, look at the persons's lips if you have to help focus your concentration.

So nobody feels like you look funny, be sure to break the gaze once in a while so you don't look like you are staring at them, which could just lead to an awkward or uncomfortable feeling.

As someone is talking, take mental notes about what they are saying. If you are unclear about a portion of what he or she says, be sure to ask them to clarify. This actually shows that you are actively listening and do care what this person has to say.

If writing notes down, don't try to capture every single word. It is nearly impossible to write word for word and actually get the meaning of what the person is trying to say to you.

If you discuss a topic that you generally do not have a lot of knowledge about, an easy way to carry on the conversation is to use the technique of piggybacking.

Your secretary is talking about how to a technical issue with the computer. You hate computers. She says the RAM needs to be upgraded and you have know idea what it is or what it does for that matter. Ask her "What about the RAM that needs to be upgraded" or "Why?"

This creates an open ended question and she has to answer with more than one word.

Also, by asking her questions, you can use the last little bit of information she shared with you in her last sentence and use that to propel your conversation further. As you continue to ask her, you remain in control of the conversation as well.

Listening skills take time to develop. By actively looking people in the eyes, and repeating small parts of what they say, you show a genuine interest in what they share with you. This makes you look more credible in the eyes of the others and strengthens the relationship overall between you and them.
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