Making Cents of Football Cletus took
Maynard to his first football game. They
had great seats right behind their team's
Bench. After the game, Cletus asked
Maynard how he liked the experience.
Maynard to his first football game. They
had great seats right behind their team's
Bench. After the game, Cletus asked
Maynard how he liked the experience.
"Oh, I really liked it," he replied, "but
I just couldn't understand why they
were killing each other over 25 cents."
I just couldn't understand why they
were killing each other over 25 cents."
Dumbfounded, Cletus asked,
"What do you mean?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, they flipped a coin, one team
got it and then for the rest of the game,
all they kept screaming was: 'Get the
quarter back! Get the quarter back!'
I mean, come on... it's only twenty-five cents!"
got it and then for the rest of the game,
all they kept screaming was: 'Get the
quarter back! Get the quarter back!'
I mean, come on... it's only twenty-five cents!"
----------------------------------------
Rude Parrot
A lady was walking past a pet store when a
parrot said, "Hey, lady! You're really ugly!"
The lady was furious and continued on her way.
A lady was walking past a pet store when a
parrot said, "Hey, lady! You're really ugly!"
The lady was furious and continued on her way.
On the way home, she passed by the petstore
again and the parrot once more said "Hey, lady!
You're really ugly!" She was incredibly upset
now, so she went into the store and said that
she would sue the store and kill the bird.
The store manager apologized profusely and
promised he would make sure the parrot didn't
say it again.
again and the parrot once more said "Hey, lady!
You're really ugly!" She was incredibly upset
now, so she went into the store and said that
she would sue the store and kill the bird.
The store manager apologized profusely and
promised he would make sure the parrot didn't
say it again.
The next day, she deliberately passed by the
store to test the parrot. "Hey, lady!" it said.
store to test the parrot. "Hey, lady!" it said.
"Yes?"
"You know."
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
New Tie
My husband said he wanted a tie for his birthday
that would match the color of his eyes. Does
anyone know where I can buy a bloodshot tie?
that would match the color of his eyes. Does
anyone know where I can buy a bloodshot tie?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Sunday after church, a mom asked her very
young daughter what the lesson in Sunday
school was about.
The daughter answered, "Don't be scared,
you'll get your quilt."
Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed.
Later in the day, the mom saw her daughter's
Sunday school teacher in the grocery store.
Mom asked her what that morning's lesson was about.
He said "Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming."
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