What I've Learned From My Third Marriage!

I am married for the third time. Yes, I'm in my mid-twenties, and by the age of twenty-one, I had already been divorced for the second time. My husband has been married once before, so this is his second marriage. Neither of us were in a big hurry to get married right away, even after we got engaged.

Perhaps we both were afraid of having another failed marriage, perhaps we both realized that since we do love each other and we're committed to making it work, that another year wasn't that long of a wait. For whatever reason, we waited a year to get married from the time we became engaged.

We're working on our fifth year together, and although it's no been easy, I can honestly say that we're both one hundred percent committed to "making it work", and we both have a sense of peace about our relationship, and we know that we can overcome any obstacles set in our way and come out stronger together for it.

My third marriage has taught me that you sometimes, the third time really is "the charm". If I hadn't already had two failed marriages, I might have walked into this marriage a little more naive, a little more likely to be willing to throw in the towel if things get rough.

If I hadn't gone through the first two horrible marriages, I might have taken my marriage vows a little less seriously this time. I mean that. My marriage now, is the most important human relationship I have, even above my children. If my relationship with my husband isn't "right", then my relationship with my children will also not be "right".

My third marriage has taught me that there's no harm in failure, but there is harm in not learning lessons that are meant to be learned from mistakes. If I hadn't learned from the mistakes I made with my first two marriages, I might have allowed the same mistakes to be made with this marriage, which would result in failure.

I have learned that compromise is a major key to marital happiness, and that it takes BOTH of us being willing to compromise. I'm not going to sit here and tell you that we never disagree or argue, that would be a complete lie. But we have learned to compromise and find solutions that both of us are happy with.

Being married for the third time really is unusual, and I find that most people make a lot of assumptions about it or about my character as a result. It often surprises people to know that, as a general rule, I don't believe in divorce. I am one hundred percent committed to my marriage, and actually happy to be so this time!

But being married for the third time has made me realize that, if something were to happen between my husband and I, chances are, it won't be anything major enough to cause divorce, and if it did, I would survive, regardless.

I've learned that I can't expect my spouse to be my sole source of happiness, and that you can't depend on another person to make you happy. Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy WITH my husband, he MAKES me happy, but not because of anything he does or does not do. It's because I am happy anyway, being with him is just the icing on the cake.

These are just a few things I've learned from my third marriage, no amount of words could ever cover everything that I've learned from my marriage. It's been a work-in-progress, and a wonderful adventure all in one. And I have the husband I wanted, was waiting on and was meant to have all along.

Any marriage, whether it's the first, second, third, fourth, fifth, etc... is only as successful as the two people in it. You'll only get out of a marriage what you put into it, and yes, compromise is an absolute must in any relationship.