Write Intelligently Until You Become A Bestselling Author

I so enjoy these posts, Pat. They read like thinking out loud, like you're sharing thoughts with me and we sip coffee very slowly because it is fresh and hot and our conversations still have a long way to go, so we savor. Thanks.

Thanks, Lynn. I try to write with a touch of wit, and if occasionally I succeed, I'm sure it's only because I am not a bestselling author. But just you wait!

Great article, Pat. I know exactly what you mean. I hardly ever read bestsellers unless it is by an author I respect. I spent some time reading only the classics, and when I picked up potboiler again, I was startled by the contrast. I guess there are factors in the publishing world that I don't understand and that don't have much to do with intelligence. You keep writing like you do--you're great!

Lol! I think your hit that one with the flat side of the hammer. Ever notice that once writers get put on contract the quality of the work suffers? Look what happened to King and Rice..Their early work was the best but once they were under pressure to pump out a novel ever year...right into the toilet.

Excellent one, Pat.

Thanks for posting to:
Gather Essentials Writing: Humor Monday

Some writers are definitely overrated. I hate it when they don't do proper research. A reader can overlook a few minor errors, but when it is so obviously wrong, it is just sloppy writing.

How is this for irony. Here I am writing about the stupidity of bestselling writers, and when I clicked on an icon to return the favor of Lisa K. for commenting on my article, I deleted her comment. I am totally embarrassed. Please Lisa, if you can, will you repost your comment? It was amusing and all so true.

This was how Lisa began her comment:

LOL. You speak the truth if ever I heard it. I read a book by a bestselling author a few months ago that was about the worst thing I'd ever read, filled with random POV switches (mid-paragraph usually).

LOL. :-D No problem. I'm happy to repost. Here was the original comment...

LOL. You speak the truth if ever I heard it. I read a book by a bestselling author a few months ago that was about the worst thing I'd ever read, filled with random POV switches (mid-paragraph usually), an over-the-top plot if ever there was one, and those oh-so-convenient implausibilities. I only kept reading to see how bad it could possibly get. In that, I wasn't disappointed.

Now that I'm back here though... One thing I've often wondered is this: Is it only because we're writers that we're so in-tune with these problems in bestselling fiction? Are non-writing readers better able to just lose themselves in a novel without being jarred by these things? I guess, in other words, how, exactly are these books getting onto the bestseller list?

Lisa, thanks for being such a good sport!

I don't know how such poor books are getting on the bestseller list, except that authors are brandnames, and people are conditioned to buying brands.

Being writers makes it easier to give names to the problems, but non-writers can still see when books are poorly written and be affected by them. Long before I started writing fiction, I lost the ability to lose myself in most novels; was too distracted by the poor writing.

But the part two then of my wondering would have to be: how did they get there in the first place? At some point these authors weren't brand names. So I wonder if they just got sloppy with their success. What were their original novels like, the ones that led to their bestselling status. I'd have a hard time believing the author that I read was ever able to put together a "readable" story -- the mechanics were just that bad -- and yet I've spoken to people who just adore her work.

Interesting article, Pat. First of all...keep writing!

As a still unpublished writer, it is easy (and frustrating) to see blatent mistakes in best sellers. In my opinion, there are a number of factors at play. First, newbie writers go through a serious vetting process. Writing groups, agents, friends, family, publishers hack away with unadulterated joy at any mistakes or perceived mistakes. When a writer is published, much less a best seller, those who were so bold may no longer be ripe to critisize even when they should. Additionally, perhaps a writer's ego becomes more pronounced. Lastly, the temptaion to get something to market for their audience (as well as for their pocketbooks) must be pronounced.

Still, breaking in we must write intelligently. The harder the hill to climb, hopefully the more dilligent our efforts will be when WE are best-selling novelists!
:-)

I've noticed that since I've started to write seriously that it's really hard to find a good read. We'll see how this week goes as I have a couple of books at the Library to pick up that I've been waiting on for months.
I've also noticed that a lot of movies and TV programs are written very poorly. Not like that's any great surprise, perhaps now I'm just not willing to sit through it.

Good article Pat. i have read some books and wondered how the hell they got published, but even teh best of them can write something that is not worth reading.

As for my writing, I cannot for the life of me get into it at the moment. i need some stimulation

Excellent article. Excellent point. I've read a few of these novels. I think I was buying one author out of habit. All of a sudden I realized I wasn't enjoying them any more. They were repetitive and boring. Needless to say, I started puting my money to better use.

I think most perennially bestselling authors got there by either being very good, finding a mentor before the publishing industry became the tail-eating worm it is today, or being in the right place at the right time. I read most current bestselling authors when they first started out, and truly enjoyed some of their books. Could be that I was young and didn't know much, could be they had a book that was truly different or outstanding, but the demands of the industry turned them into me-toos who wrote throwaway novels. Andrew Vasch, for example, started his career with an absolutely riveting character who lived off the grid -- no home, no car, no friends, etc. By the second book, the character had contacts and friends all over the place, and everyone knew where to find him. Needless to say, I was less than impressed. I hate to admit it, but I even read a Barbara Cartland book once. One of her first books. Well written, good characterization, multiple story lines. Then she became the poster child of bestselling authors who turned out crappy novels by the hundreds. Made a fortune.

I do think the bestsellers list is a self-energizing machine. Once you get there, unless you really screw up, you can stay there. The problem is, those authors are so entrenched that it is almost impossible for a newcomer to oust them. Even death will no longer do it. Look at James Patterson -- his name has become a franchise, so books will probably still be published under his name when he is mouldering in his grave. Carolyn Keene or Franklin W. Dixon, anyone?

I don't have anything interesting to say on this article, I just wanted to drop in and say hello. Anything that requires me to think right now just isn't for me. hee hee

Pat, I do think that when writer turns into brand, there is a major possibility that the writing will regress. It doesn't have to work that way. John McDonald turned out reams of amazing work in the last 22 years of his life, much of it based on Travis McGee and a familiar cast of characters. But he breathed life into these characters and did not take the easy ways out.

For a while, I read all of James Lee Burke's books, especially his Dave Robicheux series set in and around New Orleans. The early books in the series were great, but he started repeating himself about ten years ago and I lost interest. He recently set the lastest of this series in the post Katrina New Orleans, so I'm giving him another chance.

Great thoughts, Pat! Of course, at the moment, I just can't write, period! I was reading a couple of first chapters on web sites just tonight, and thinking along those same lines. One chapter was frought with passive voice, another had a lengthy narrative that seemed mundane for an opening.

I'm struggling to figure out what works! Guess I'll take your advice and just write intelligently . . . that is when I can write again!

I just finished the newest Patricia Cornwell and I must say I was utterly flabergasted by how . . . bad the novel was. She kept referring back to what happened in previous novels--practically screaming for new readers to pick up those books as well. I suppose it might peak a newbies interest, but was quite unnerving for those of us who have read those books and were craving something new and interesting. She also began each chapter as if it were a screenplay. A one liner for where the setting took place. Yes, this saves time in setting up the scenes properly, but it also throws the reader completely out of the action--and seemed quite author intrusive to me.

I got bored with her books years ago. After I lost interest in Kay Scarpetta, Cornwell piqued my interest again when she wrote a book with a new hero, Judy Hammer, but lost it for good when I found out it was the first of a series and not a stand alone book. One reason I still like Dick Francis is that all of his books are stand alone books (except for one trilogy, I think.) So every book he had to start over with fresh characters. No references to previous books.

It's sad because there were some really great reads in Patricia Cornwell's earlier work (The Body Farm, for example). Over the last few years though, it's been all downhill. To me, the books all feel perfunctory now. There's no energy in them whatsoever.

I, too, prefer standalones which is why I almost exclusively read literary novels. Yes, I write thriller novels, but don't especially like most of what is published. Mine are more like the thrillers you find in the movie medium.

Unfortunately, most publishers in the Crime Fiction genre want to make a 2-book deal, therefore what they really want are serials. Readers love them.

Then you would be bored stiff with Cornwell's "Book of the Dead", Kate. EVERYBODY's tired and worn out in that one. Not one sparkle of light--not even from Neice Lucy who is normally quite vibrant and frankly, the only reason I kept up with the series. She was once a compelling character. Alas, no more.

That's how it reads to me too, as if she'd gotten tired of Kay Scarpetta and she's only continuing with the series out of obligation or reader pressure or...who knows. It's sad though to see a once good author putting out the kind of work she's putting out now.

If I like a character or a book, I always look forward to a second one, but by the third I get bored. I can't imagine having to spend one's life writing one or two characters. I agree with WS. Cornwell is tired of Kay, Grafton is tired of Kinsey, Ridley Pearson is tired of Lou Boldt, and on and on.

Robin Cook doesn't write a series character, but don't get me started on him!

Robin Cook... No kidding. Did you happen to read his book "Abduction"? It was the one about Atlantis. Seriously, that was about as bad as it gets.

I did read it. All the way through. Unfortunately.

When he decided to take a leave from being a doctor (though he wore that lab coat lest we forget his exalted status!) and become a writer, he read 100 bestsellers, disected them, and figured out what they all had in common. Too bad he didn't read a few books with fully developed characters to add to the mix.

I don't think writing badly is a prerequisite for being a bestselling author. It just seems that way.

Re: Robin Cook. I forgot -- he now has a series character. How lucky can we get!

Love your advice to write intelligently. You're so right--some authors get away with murder. Convinces me that one day even my books will be published. If they can do it...

A serial character, really? I gave up on him after "Abduction". :-(

This is great advice. Thank you for sharing it -j.

Thanks Pat. I think I'll go through my books and toss the ones I don't like.

"in one book, the writer has the villain searching the hero's house for a set of papers that weren't there because the hero had removed them on a hunch." Well that would have the hero one step ahead wouldn't it? That may sound too simple but it's believable. Stephen makes a good point. Once you getyour novice ass kicked by the system it's easy to pick on the successful. Better to study and be successful. Critics are a 11 cents a dozen.

Long before I was a writer, I was a reader, a member of the book-buying public, one of the people for whom books are published. The publishing industry has finally convinced me that books are a commodity like any other, so why shouldn't I pick on the successful if they don't write books I enjoy? If I buy a sweater that has flaws, I have every right to complain. Why do I lose my right to complain about a book that has flaws just because I am now trying to be a writer? The reader in me hated the hunch; it ruined the story because the whole book rested on that one point, and I did not find it believable. The writer in me saw the problem: it wasn't motivated. And I did learn from it. I will not be using hunches in my novels unless I can make them believable.

Deborah, Patricia Cornwell used to be one of my favorite authors until I read Southern Comfort. When she gave the dog a POV I almost threw the book across the room. Then the dialogue supposedly at a police task force meeting was so bad I had to close the book to keep from screaming. Honestly, it really made me angry. There are still good writers I enjoy very much. I don't know if Solomita ever made the best selling list but he's fabulous. I think ego and pressure causes some bad mistakes to be made my great authors. It's a shame, really.

Write intelligently... Pat? This could CHANGE THE FACE OF PUBLISHING.

The rebellion started here, folks, and you saw it first.

I shore don't like to write intelligently meself. I find dat the written word speaks fer itself.
Ha! Just funning ya.
I can't stand implausible reasons in novels myself. I want something that doesn't insult my brain juices. I mean come on!

mmmm.... braiiiinnn juuuiiicesss.....

Ha, ha! Quit stalking me Tracy, or I'll sick Petey on you.
Double ha!

Pat and all you other responders - you've voiced my feelings exactly. Thank you for validating; I was beginning to think I was the one out of step. In fact, I got so fed up with what I was spending my time reading, I decided to see if I could write a novel that would hold the readers interest without explicit sex on the second page for no reason. Since then, I've written four books! So don't get mad - get even! It's sad to read a book that is easily forgotten a week later. Thanks for telling me how you really feel. Marie Pinschmidt