by Michelle C.
Member since:
May 26, 2007

What happened to decent respect for America's children and elderly?

January 29, 2008 10:47 PM EST
views: 336 | rating: 10/10 (12 votes) | comments: 21

A friend of mine recently has been updating me about how her mother recently has been struggling with Dementia (a similar disorder to Alzheimer's).

I did meet her mother previously in the past and was a well respected, quiet natured woman that would always ask you if you'd like tea or some cookies when visiting.

It has been sad to hear that she is now struggling with such a difficult disorder that many do not understand.

Her mother is currently placed in a facility for her condition, but hasn't been receiving adequate treatment for her disorder and has been having items stolen by other patients from her room. Her daughter (my friend) has been labeling every item that is in the treatment facility.

We both were looking for an alternative treatment for her mother, but in hard effort, she was advised a doctor in her area for such a difficult disorder (that was talked about at a local dentistry about how she was a caring individual and makes sure her patients needs are met).

Her mother has been on a waiting list and was approved for her residential treatment houses. She was told by the doctor that her housing allows 5-6 individuals to stay in the group typed setting for such mental disorders.

Unfortunately, the state kept denying the doctor what she needed to get the housing in place for the elderly, here is the article for more information:

http://www.dailyherald.com/story/?id=119197

A comment was posted previously (not sure if it still has been posted on the newspaper article), about how the residential treatment housing is conflicting with zoning and the area that has been chosen for such treatment.

As most the majority probably knows, that for anyone to function in society, that we need to be merged with society (our community) and not sheltered away {this would just cause more conflict) with how we'd function adequately as a productive citizen.

How can someone expect our elderly or children to be sheltered away from society or our community? As an American citizen, isn't it our duty to make sure our elderly and children are taken care of, and respected? Or am I making a mistake?

I definitely support the lady titled Ross (the doctor) in this newspaper article due to her being a fighter and supporting elderly individual's rights and I do believe she is fighting for a good cause and I support her in legalizing her care.

What frustrates me is that, the state wants to fight her to all means to refuse her type of care for the elderly. If that was the treatment center for their mother or father, do you think it would be denied and not assisted in getting legalized? No, it wouldn't happen like that. She is doing everything she can to make it right and still is getting denied in the process.

So, as for all my Gather friends and other Gatherers, I'd like to ask of you, can you please leave a comment on this newspaper article leaving your thoughts and views on this matter?

PS.... It frustrates me how neighbors can get upset over home daycares and screaming children outside and now its an elderly residential housing treatment facility?

People are blowing things way out of proportion and being way too controlling over matters. We're already being told by Atheists to take the word "God" off our money. I've read somewhere that eventually it may come down to us, not being able to attend church anymore.

Think about it all : Not being able to go to church anymore, not being able to read a Bible in our home; not being able to smoke in our own vehicle or home; not being able to have a residential treatment facility in a neighborhood (due to neighbors complaining); not being able to have a child daycare in a residential unit (due to neighbors complaining).... what will it be next?

Isn't it our jobs as an American citizen to take care and have respect for our children and elderly? So, this is where I ask, what happened to descent respect for America's children and elderly? Just respect in general, though.

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Comments: 21

Adele G. Jan 29, 2008, 11:03pm EST
Unfortunately, respect for others begins when a child is very young if they are not taught then by their parents more than likely they will never be taught. We see a generation in this country who were not taught respect for others. It is a ME FIRST generation, and we are all paying the price for it.
Heather C. Jan 29, 2008, 11:20pm EST
I helped my Dad take care of her mother to keep her out of a nursing home. It is diffcult to see this kind of disorder rob their mind. My mother thought I was her mother, her nurse her sister. She thought my Dad was her Dad.

These facilities are not very good places for people to be. They don't pay well, nor do they screen the people they hire. One lady I knew had a friend who was unable to leave her bed in one of these places. Another lady left the dining room and thought the lady in bed was in her bed and beat her something awful..the lady could do nothing and she died a week later. If there had been more staff or better supervision, this poor lady would have never had such a tragic end.

Your article was well written and I will go to the newspaper article next.
Jean, just the teensiest bit odd, F. Jan 30, 2008, 4:14am EST
We had a similiar kind of situation in my home town awhile back where the people who lived in a neighborhood where a major hospital was located complained and petitioned against the noise that the medical evacuation helicopter made coming and going from the roof of the hospital bringing severely injured people in for treatment... I couldn't help but think, "If that were YOU or someone YOU loved in that helicopter and it was YOUR life that hung in the balance? You would think that a couple of minutes of noise would be a very small price to pay..."

I agree completely that people have become so INSULATED, so SELFISH, so wrapped up in their OWN little "worlds" that they have completely LOST all empathy and sympathy for their fellow human beings and this has contributed to so much of the violence, callousness and separation between people...

I'm not sure how putting (or not putting) the word "God" on paper money fits into this subject, however...
Rose Lamatt Jan 31, 2008, 3:40pm EST
((As an American citizen, isn't it our duty to make sure our elderly and children are taken care of, and respected? Or am I making a mistake?))

No you are not making a mistake. Fight as hard as you can for the Elderly and our children. I know the Elderly are being miss treated, especially Alzheimer's victims or any form of Demenia because they cannot speak for themselves. Please speak up for them. I ask all of you.

I've worked in the 'Health Care Industry' and see how it's going down hill. The CNA's,(nursing aides) work too many hours, get paid too little, and after awhile they are burned out and don't care. "It's just a job", someone said to me back in 1999.

Excellent website. Please change this epidemic. http://www.nursinghomeaction.com/default.cfm
Alice N. Feb 3, 2008, 6:30pm EST
I agree. It seems like every large building or complex in our area is either to house the elderly or children in daycare. I call the elderly homes Old-People Garages and hope I am never parked in one.
Elsie Duggan Feb 4, 2008, 7:18pm EST
I think this is an important subject, and yes, I think the government has too much control over a great many aspects of our lives at this time, and too many changes are being made to our constitution without our having been given a chance to voice an opinion on it, I think we all had better sit up and take notice. I am one of those elderly people, thankfully still able to function and do for myself, but I sure hope I never am warehoused, I would rather have someone shoot me first, sound bad, well not if you have witnessed first hand what goes on in them as I have, Young people, look at what is happening and think about your children and their children, it may not be too late to save some of it, read our constitution, know your rights and then work like heck to preserve them.
Michelle C. Feb 4, 2008, 7:44pm EST
Alice, I wasn't targetting elderly, nor was I stating I didn't like elderly or childcare in housing additions. Instead, I'm for merging elderly and children with our community. How else will someone learn without being merged with our community and society? Its impossible and our children and elderly deserve better respect than being thrown in nursing homes, away from family and friends. Its like taking them and dropping them off at a babysitter. I don't trust nursing homes... they're horrible, especially the treatment elderly receive. Let alone, daycares are hard to trust too, but with being merged, parents can at least have some relief that a child's well being is being better reared when in the community as a whole.
Michelle C. Feb 4, 2008, 7:45pm EST
Adele - I definitely agree with you, respect begins when a child is youngest. Your rear your child from day one. What the child chooses to do is their choice, but the chances of a child having more respect is if you rear them younger. I've noticed a big difference with children from knowing first hand.
Michelle C. Feb 4, 2008, 7:46pm EST
Now, please don't take me wrong, some nursing homes are okay, but most nursing homes do not try to merge elderly in the community as a whole. Most just shelter them away from the REAL world. And how else do you expect individuals to get better when they're sheltered away from the real world. They don't... they don't have anything to live for, nor any motivators.
Michelle C. Feb 4, 2008, 7:49pm EST
Heather, its very sad what happens in today's nursing homes and daycares. Physical abuse by other patients and children is horrible. You'd be surprised the worsest of cases. And what nursing homes and daycares you think ARE safe, most likely aren't. I believe you can get health reports in the Social Service office. I'll have to check where you can look into the complaints. Not for exact on that, though. I heard it I believe on 60 minutes or something like that.
Michelle C. Feb 4, 2008, 7:51pm EST
Jean, as for the word God and money situations, I was referring to how controlling our world is coming down to. Individuals not wanting the word "God" on money, it says somewhere how the world may come down to, not being able to go to church or having freedom of religion, how people do not respect our children, elderly (or people in general for that matter), and so forth. Its just getting to being a controlling world and I dislike that.
Michelle C. Feb 4, 2008, 7:55pm EST
Ashleigh, I'm a teen mother and cannot speak for all teen mothers, but I'd like to say how I'm very mature for my age. I was raised and matured right and know what is right from wrong. I also think it all comes down to HOW a parent raises a child, on how well they will function in the "real world." I think teens CAN raise children, as long as they're brought up right, have the maturity, values, and so forth. Now I do think teenagers should HAVE an education (don't get me wrong) and should financially and all be able to back themselves up some, but don't get me wrong (what mother or father doesn't have emotional, financially, or physical problems when having a child?) No parent will be prepared, that's just the facts... no parent, but then again, I think it all comes down to the way people are raised and what values they've been brought up to have.
Michelle C. Feb 4, 2008, 8:02pm EST
Rm, my mother was also a CNA and let me tell you, her days weren't easy. Unfortunately, she was being harrassed in the hospital environment and had to also care for elderly patients. She would work 40+ hours and would never get a raise when the "horrible workers" would. The horrible workers would have sex behind work (and this would interfere) with jobs and so forth, but since it couldn't be proved and it was "off the job," nothing could pretty much be done. Finally one day, my mother spoke up after she had worked hard, treated elderly with respect, and wasn't getting a raised and got upset and said to her boss (that showed his thing on the job), that never got fired "well, I mise well put my 2 week notice in." Even though it wasn't in writing, he made her resign, right then and there and considered that a 2-week notice. She was forced to quit (pretty much fired), mise well say. She went down to the unemployment office and Civil Rights (something like that), due to him being black and descriminating. She fought for what was right.... she wouldn't give up. She went to court, appealed, had witnesses. The hospital officials never showed up...and guess what? She got everything! Now she's also on disability due to her anxiety and the harrassment. I did get a lump sum off my mother and I used that for college courses for Psychology. I did appreciate it. It helped. I love my mother, but she is a fighter like me and she fights for what is right, but as my mother always has told me : What Goes Around, Comes Around. ;)
Michelle C. Feb 4, 2008, 8:08pm EST
Elsie, You know what is right... Speak up for your rights. You deserve justice too! :)
Michelle C. Feb 4, 2008, 8:09pm EST
Oh and by the way, Elsie, I cannot speak for all young ones like myself, but what I've noticed in the majority of individuals my age : they do not have respect for children, nor our elderly and that upsets me. Maybe I have more respect because of the fact that my father reared me right in that aspect.
M & M. Feb 6, 2008, 3:33pm EST
I'm with you honey. This is a big mess, and I don't know how we can change it now.
Kimber L. Feb 12, 2008, 2:25pm EST
I agree with you! It seems today's society is much ruder and uncaring then our parents days. Like if I had been in my car accident in 1960 instead of now, the people would have got out and given me their info and helped out with my kids who were hurt until the squad got there, rather then the jerk of a kid who was going to leave the scene if i hadn't yelled at him "Don't you leave my kids are hurt" and pretended to take a photo of his license plate with my cell phone!

Overall people everywhere are ruder, wanting convenience, quick fix to problems, and instant gratification. It seems like no one has patience anymore. I try to teach my kids respect for everyone and involve them in church and in fundraising activities for charities such as the heart foundation, walk for alzheimers, and relay for life (cancer). I also try to set an example with my own behavior!
Kimber L. Feb 12, 2008, 2:26pm EST
Okay.... stepping down off my soapbox now.... before i really get going on everything from teen pregnancy to domestic violence!~!!!

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