These seemed good to me when I read them in my email.
Once I heard a radio commercial that said:"What would it be like to lose an entire hemisphere of your brain? Tune in to the Discovery Channel and find out!"
Finally, they admit it.
Three elderly gentlemen were gathered in a coffee shop discussing life in general, when they began discussing what type of legacy they would leave for generations to follow.
"What would you like your offspring to say about you in fifty years?" asked one of them.
"I would like my grandchildren to say, 'He was successful in business,'" declared the first man.
"Fifty years from now," said the second, "I want them to say, 'He was a loyal family man.'"
Turning to the third gent, he asked, "So what do you want them to say about you in 50 years?"
"Me?" the third one replied. "I want them to say, 'He certainly looks good for his age.'"
A mother camel and a baby camel were talking one day when the baby camel asked, "Mom, why do we have these huge three-toed feet?"
The mother replied, "Well son, when we trek across the desert, our toes will help us stay on top of the soft sand."
Two minutes later the young camel asked, "Mom, why do we have these long eyelashes?"
"They are there to keep the sand out of our eyes on the trips through the desert," the mother said.
"Mom, why have we got these great big humps on our back?"
"They are there to help us store water for our long treks across the desert, so we can go without drinking for long periods of time."
"So we have huge feet to stop us from sinking, long eyelashes to keep the sand out of our eyes, and these humps to store water."
"So what are we doing in the zoo?"