I enjoyed these when I read them in my email.
Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son."Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!" she said.
"But why, Mom? I don't want to go," he replied.
"Why you don"t want to go?" said the mom. "Well, all the kids hate me and the teachers hate me, too!" responded the son.
"Oh, but that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready," said the mother.
"Why I should go to school?" requested the son.
"Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And second, you're the PRINCIPAL!"
- Real mothers don't eat quiche; they don't have time to make it.
- Real mothers know that their kitchen utensils are probably in the sandbox.
- Real mothers often have sticky floors, filthy ovens, and happy kids.
- Real mothers know that dried playdough doesn't come out of shag carpet.
- Real mothers don't want to know what the vacuum just sucked up.
- Real mothers sometimes ask "why me," and get their answer when a little voice says, "because I love you best."
- Real mothers know that a child's growth is not measured by height or years or grade...it is marked by the progression of Mama to Mommy to Mom.
Several weeks after a young man had been hired by an advertising agency, he was called into the personnel director's office.
"What is the meaning of this?" the director asked. "When you applied for this job, you told us you had five years experience. Now we discovered this is the first job you've ever held."
"Well," the young man replied, "in your advertisement you said you wanted somebody with imagination."
Trying to come to the aid of his father, who was stopped by an officer for speeding, the little boy piped up, "Yeah? Well, if we were speeding, so were you!"
DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S WRONG WITH POLITICAL JOKES?
They get elected
WHAT DID ONE SAND PILE SAY TO THE OTHER?
What cha dune?