Snowflakes (rictameter)

Snowflakes

slowly dust down

through an uncertain sky

like torn bits of old love letters.

I hear his voice, soft as snow on my face,

reach to catch delicate crystals,

come away with nothing,

white on cold white,

snowflakes.

Comments: 24

Sensational Sadie Sexy Senior Sitizen Jan 6, 2008, 10:28am EST

Very nice Marianne. I must do a few more of this genre.

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Marianne M. Jan 6, 2008, 12:11pm EST

Thanks for your kind comment. I'm afraid I'm becoming slightly obsessed with this form!

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Jim Ross Jan 6, 2008, 12:32pm EST

I love the transference here, Marianne, the physical reaching to make it real, and the emptiness of discovery that nothing lasts, at least unmodified.

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LaRue B. Jan 6, 2008, 1:02pm EST

love the comparison of snow being like torn pieces of a love letter. wonderful poem. sometimes in a relationship one can come away empty.

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David C. Jan 6, 2008, 1:55pm EST

another great poem!

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Trudy P. Jan 6, 2008, 2:22pm EST

Very nice Marianne! I can actually see the snow flakes drifting down in my mind!

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Marianne M. Jan 6, 2008, 3:19pm EST

Jim!
Snow has an ethereal quality, like love sometimes does, fragile and almost too perfect for this world. Thank you for seeing this in my simple words.

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Marianne M. Jan 6, 2008, 3:21pm EST

LaRue,
Love can leave us empty at times, even though we seek fulfillment. I appreciate your kind words.

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Marianne M. Jan 6, 2008, 3:23pm EST

David,
Thank you for your generous compliment!

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Marianne M. Jan 6, 2008, 6:14pm EST

Trudy,
I think you're seeing flashbacks of that old Minnesota snow you managed to escape! I really do appreciate your nice comment.

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Kimi L. Jan 7, 2008, 11:55am EST

That was a pretty poem! :)

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DragonSoul !. Jan 7, 2008, 12:01pm EST

I also really liked the comparison of snowflakes to torn love-letters. It really made snow feel more wrm and personal instead of just cold and wet. Great rictameter! Up here in MN people must go through a lot of love letters to cover this area so thoroughly lol.

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