I don't understand it.... (a slight rant)

Honestly I can't manage the connections I have now. I think some members want more connections to 1. promote themselves 2. get comments on certain types of "articles" to get more points I have 1662 messages in my gather mailbox and not one of them is a personal message.

Gather wants me to connect with anyone who wants to connect with me, so I do. No skin off my nose. I subscribe explicitly to those people, such as you, I want to keep up with.

I suspect wanting lots of connections is related in kind to wanting a big penis or a Hummer.

i think the people after connections for connections sake are really just trying to get more "points," more people to possibly comment on what they post and more places for them to go and post ... i only use gather to look for writing talent that we might help get published and do marketing for and to keep up with your recipes and see what is going on around town that i might have missed :) ... not after points or connections ...

I will connect with most anyone. I will check out their latest tags, or articles to see what they normally say. If they are overtly politcal, I typically will not connect with them.
I don't really know how to go about weeding through my connections. How do you know if they ever comment on your content or not?
I do regularly go through my group & disconnect from the ones that I never publish to, and I am selective about adding new groups as well.

I have 141 connections and that's more than I intended to have when I started. It's hard to read everything. I try to just comment on the people who have commented on my articles or those who publish something that I MUST read, such as your wonderful recipes. I also do not connect with everyone who asks for one. I check out their articles and profiles and if there's no reason for a connection such as a shared interest, I decline.

I don't mind connecting with whoever asks...I won't ask others unless I see indications that we have things in common, or i enjoy their work so much that I don't want to miss other postings...

but I have also turned off all notifications, am merciless about blocking email senders, and don't bother with anything that looks like a game, an email forward, or freebies... and if someone is SO prolific with posting that sort of stuff that they overwhelm my Articles for Me listings with it, I quietly disconnect from them even if they seemed nice enough in the beginning.

Oh yeah... and patronizing = instant disconnect as well; can't stand patronizing people.

Sonia, I have just over a hundred connections and it's hard to keep up with even that many for me. I try to only connect with people I have an intrest in reading their articles or who have the same intrests as I do. I actually feel guilty sometimes when I turn down a connection but after reading your article I don't think I will anymore and may even delete a few of my connections that have never made comments on any of my articles and I'm not interested in theirs either. Especially since I used to accept any and all invitations. I only invite someone if we seem to have similar interests.

I too would be interested to see why anyone would want that many connections.

My answer to your questions: no, no, no, and no. I've kept (over two years now) under 140 connections and I am constantly culling. I accept newcomers who seem to be open to commenting and assessing poetry, and also have a sense of humor. But quickly I find those who just don't care about anything but my commenting on their articles and have completely forgotten there are others out here. It's pretty easy to spot.

Oh Sonia, I'm so in agreement with you. When people do this, they are involved with either some crazy status game with themselves or they are just displacing in a very obsessive way or they are trying to find some absurd new system to get points I suppose toward the cards or other forms of payment Gather offers.

Cognitive scientists have proven repeatedly in the past few years that the human capacity to sustain meaningful relationships in any kind of closed system is more or less set at around 150 contacts, give or take a few at this ceiling. In his bestselling book on how ideas travel and people connect, The Tipping Point, Malcolm Gladwell, the New Yorker's science writer, uses a small company to illustrate how this works in a very enlightening (and definitive) fashion. I encourage everyone who really thinks THEY MUST ACHIEVE 1000 CONNECTIONS and sustain them to read at least this portion of Gladwell's book.

I am in the same boat as you. I have 400 or so connections, mostly because too often in the past I just was too codependent to say know when a person made a nice pitch to be my new friend on Gather.

Truth is, I do occasionally read my connections work, but 95 per cent of my reading and commenting revolves around people like you, Sonia, people who I've developed a relationship with through reciprocal commenting and some email contact, and who I've subsequently SUBSCRIBED to.

So it is my subscriptions that are crucial to me, and I would say two or three times a month I change a connection into a subscription, because I really like what I'm reading or they are commenting on me regularly. Every now and then like you I cull the people from my subscriptions who have ceased to comment on my work, usually because they have left Gather or just decided I guess that I am not their cup of tea.

I have an active social life here in Granada with " real world" friends, and in addition I teach, am finishing a novel, editing a play, etc. I simply couldn't sustain more than 150 virtual relationships if I wanted to, and it's interesting that I have approximately between 120--150 subcriptions, for this number wavers depending on how many people I decide are simply not reading my stuff anymore.

I am not saying that 'quid pro quo' is essential for me to sustain a relationship with a subscription. I don't want to flatter you excessively, but since I don't know any other "foodies" on Gather and you simply are a first rate professional writer who constantly amazes me with your ingenious recipes and exotic fruits and foods, I would probably read you anyhow from time to time if you didn't comment on my work. Since you do, I try not to miss more than a few of your articles, because we've established such a nice give and take in our delightful relationship, since you usually don't read poetry as a rule. You and I have developed and extended our interests through our unique evolving friendship, and as a result hopefully you've learned a bit about poetic writing just as I've certainly learned loads about tropical food and recipes, and even implemented at least half a dozen of your recipes to my wife Inma's amazement and gustatory pleasure.

But this relationship is doubtless an exception to the rule, and most of the time we read people who write things that are similiar to what we like and write ourselves. How can someone claim to have 1000 connections who write about similiar topics as themselves? Answer: They can't. Your rant is justified.

Unless you're a lunatic or a complete shut-in, I recommend that people stick to about 150 solid connections, and use the subscription system, you get notices faster.

Thanks, Sonia.

I used to have 400+ connections and I couldn't keep up with it all. I went through and cut them down to about 130. They're people that actually comment on my articles and I comment on theirs. I think having the fewer connections has improved my gathering pleasure bunches. I've gotten to know some of the regular posters much better and formed relationships I wouldn't have formed with over 400 connections. I have no idea why people are striving for 1000.

Anne Marie...funny you should be the first to comment on this as you are one of my connections I feel really guilty about, since I've not been able to read or comment on your articles lately.... Profuse apologies and I will try to do better! Thanks for commenting on this...I am really stumped!
Oh and about the thousands of messages in your Gather mail box.....you can use the BLOCK member option when it gets too bad....I did. I had to block some that seemed to write mass messages anytime they sneezed.... ;-)

Kevin, I might have to start just using the subscription method and get notices of people I like to keep up with - like you - BTW your last line is priceless!

Larry, thank you. I appreciate that you look for my recipes and such. A lot! I too believe in the rest of what you say,....too many are connecting for connections sake...

Priscilla, that is what I have been doing, but from time to time I have to cull them. It is hard to do, but I probably will have to keep on culling....although Kevin's idea of subscriptions sounds really good to me!

Katie, I understand exactly how you feel. I wish I could go back to just 100 or so. It was much easier and more comfortable to keep up with everyone....but, the problem is...who would get cut? I have quite a few some connections I truly value and don't want to unsub from them!

Sylvie, I'd much rather have a few really good ones than a bunch I can't take care of anyway....wow 11 connections.....! that would be the easier route, but I would hate to disconnect with some of the people I have become friendly with.

Flit, I hear you and agree with you on all counts.....including the patronizing comment!

Joan.....you're one of the connections with whom I would like to interact more. I feel really guilty when sometime pass and I haven't read your recipes, cookbook reviews and other articles.

Faith, one thing I have always liked about you is your no nonsense approach. Yes, the ones that are here just to gather connections (pun intended) are fairly easy to spot.

Thank you all for giving me some of your insight into this perplexing matter.........
I think Kevin has the solution (partially). Keep accepting connections if they are so desperate to add numbers, but subscribe to the ones you are really interested in. I will try to give that a whirl and see if it works for me.

Sonia, you know I'm not a cook, so I read your recipes because I like you and the way you write. I read, but I don't comment. I have a few other connections like that -- I read but rarely comment.

I have 126 connections in my network, and I try very hard to watch for them and read something they have posted. A few are "alternate identities" that I ignore -- they exist as jokes, we all know it, and I pay attention to the main character. As such, 126 connections probably translates to 100 people That's more than enough here.

I do read what those in my network post. I doubt they all return that courtesy, but it doesn't matter. I connected because I like what they write, not because they are fans of my writing.

Oh, John.....your well thought out comment deserves a reply of its own.....You are an amazing friend and I keep finding reasons why I like you so much. See, you understand me. I might not be into poetry per se, but I can appreciate the poet! The relationship we have been building, through Gather and through private messages means very much to me. That you appreciate my food articles and recipes and have even tried some yourself is a big boost to my ego, even if you aren't trying to inflate it...;-))) - Please, go ahead an flatter me all you want....!

.. y te aprecio igualmente desde el fondo de mi corazon. You are a true friend, John. Thank you!

Sonia - I don't connect for the sake of connecting and frequently go through and cull the ones I do have. I usually fluctuate between 250 and 275. When it starts to close in on 300, I've found it's way too many. And I do subscribe to the handful who I most care about reading (you included, my friend).

Question #1 Yes, but only to a certain degree. Question #2 Yes, it helps to have something in common. Questions #3 and #4 No. You don't have to connect if you don't want to.

Liz, my dear, you are a rare jewel in my Gather firmament....and I would not disconnect from you for the world, even if you would never come and read me. You are also one of the few I always feel guilty about not visiting as often and I would like... Truly, I have to mend my ways............and it is truly delightful and oh,so lovely to be called a girl by you, when I am so much older than you...;-)

Vicky, I can appreciate that your Gather experience has been enriched by culling your connections to what you can handle and enjoy. If I wasn't a correspondent who is encouraged to acept all connections, I probably would have no more than 150 as John suggests.... I'm glad you're one of mine and you didn't take my name off your list! ;-)

Dannielle, that is such a refreshing comment. I appreciate that you like to read my articles even if you don't consider yourself a cook! thank you so much for being one of my delightful connections!

Tonia , I feel the same.....and I love our connection and through you the one I made with Deb. I might miss a article here or there that you publish, but not often and sometimes I even go back sometime to see what I might have missed and try to remedy it.

Thank you Cheryl...I appreciate your input very much!

Sonia, I'm at 585 connections and it is difficult to keep up. I try to read a bit everyday but I get buried quickly. In an effort to try to read everyone I end up missing some of my favorites. I have been trying something new with the New Year. I try to read at least one article by one connection per day. In some cases one person may publish 10-15 times. I simply cannot respond to every article so I start out reading in order, if I come up to a notification from someone and I have already visited them then I skip and move on. If I finish up with the articles I have waiting I back track. I hardly ever ask for a connection. I also noticed I was bombarded with requests duing this last shorts contest. These were followed by mass mailings from the same people. I have no desire to reach 1000. I work hard to keep up as it is.

btw- How is Anthony doing?

This is just so interesting. Magi, Faith and I had this conversation just the other day. All three of us, unbeknowth to the others, decided "culling" two days ago and when the topic came up we just started smiling. John had a good point when he mentioned the book, "The Tipping Point".....150 is about what person can handle. (In a further note, that's why mega high schools do not work....high schools of 150 students are the best). I really enjoy my connections...I look forward to their articles. Friday nights I always pop in to see what Ina has written and to read the comment strand...after a hard week at work, she just brings me smiles as does Madame Donna, Ivy, Mariana and Dannielle. If it's food I'm craving or the exotic, I run over to see you or Katrina Hall. If it's poetry (and you have to remember, before Gather I hadn't read a poem in a billion years) then I turn to faith, Jan H., Amy George, Ed and magi. Then of course I have my photo essay people who have really opened up my eyes.....and I read them religiously. Then, the thoughtful writing of some of my connections that make me think outside the box. Yup, 150....is really all I can handle and even maybe that's too much.

Apryl, I think that is a great idea. I cannot come into Gather to read everyday....and when I can, sometimes it is for just a half hour here and there.

I sent a letter to apology to all my connections not too long ago because I hadn't been able to read or comment on much of their work.....and was overwhelmed with the responses of so many....truly, they are my friends and not just connections....and I appreciate their loyalty very much. You were one of them!

Anthony is going through a rough time right now. His Fibro-fog has really kicked in the last couple of days.

He is another reason I don't have as much time to spend at the computer....since he can't drive due to his Fibro and meds, I am his designated driver - for real, even keep a Dr. Rx saying so in glove compartment for insurance purposes... and he has 5 doctors...so that alone keeps us busy.

Hi, Bob.....I made a note of the book "The Tipping Point" when John mentioned it. I will make it a point to read it and am checking first to see if our local library has it in.
I too have some favorites in different categories that I enjoy reading....and I need to concentrate on the friends that are true friends....You are one of them. .....and your photo essays always either make me smile or give me something to think about.

I certainly don't want 1000~When I hit 500, I go through and cut at least 100. I have found myself turning down more and more connection requests, as so many are simply First Chapter writers who want me to read something, or people that I don't have anything in common with. If someone comments on my article, or if I read an article and like what I read...I connect.

I've been trying to do the same, Sue.

Funny you mention First Chapters. I have commented on a few and then get all sorts of requests for connections with messages such as "I read a very insightful comment you made to one of the First Chapters writers and am inviting you to read mine....etc, etc...." when I do, I never hear from them again except to tell me they made it to the 2nd round and please go read, give a 10 and comment....!

I have way too many connections and I can't keep up with them. I usually hold a request until I check them out. This year I would like to go through my connections and cull them out but it's so difficult to go through all of them. I so wish there was a way to put my connections in different folders so if I want to read poetry I pull up the poetry folder. Oh well.

Sonia, I'm still laughing about Kevin's comment way up there in the thread. I do agree with him. My hope has always been to find connections who share my interests and conversely people I can enjoy or who teach me new things.

I don't understand the need for 100s of connections so I certainly don't understand those who desire 1000. I like to keep my connection list small although sometimes I allow it to balloon up to see which of those who wanted to connect might surprise me and be a good fit. If it doesn't work, I disconnect.

I began a descent back into the fog last week and immediately began taking my B-12 and B complex. These are helpful I have also had the B-12 injections, they are great. An injection lasts for a month and is only about ten dollars, the difference they make in my world are extreme. I always feel better when I am on B-12. With fibro it is so hard to maintain energy as you know from Anthony. I hope he does better. My own Anthony has one of my illnesses, he has the psoriatic arthritis and I am worried about him.

I have always appreciated your friendship sonia, you were one of my first connections.

Trish, I had a similar thought sometime ago... It would be great to be able to group our connections according to interest! You just explained much better than I could have!

Donna, our cheffy friend can put me in stitches sometime! I'm seeing that most of my own connections feel about this situation the same as I do...I want quality and not quantity.....people with so many connections just don't cultivate them....

Thanks for the B12 and B vitamin idea, Apryl. I will have to tell him and see if it works for him like they do with you! Fibromyalgia is such a complex disease and so new to so many doctors that some still don't have a handle on it....and what seems to work for some patients doesn't always work on others!

You were one of my first connections also and I do appreciate you very much...even when yoyu might not see me often!
I

HEy Sonia!
Ya know I just do what I can...Ihave disconnected to a few people who neve respond..or only send me"seemy article emails"..I am sure there are a fw who might think the same of me..though I have only occassionally sent out an email..and oft get severly repremanded when I do....
I am probably not as well focused as you and others here on gather....I am the perpetual explorer...so I often get sidetracked when reading here on gather....and I tink I spend much to much time here...LOL..but to be truely fair to my connections not enough....
and I probably read more than I respond to...cause I dont like just droppingin and saying GREAT....If I respond I try to really say something...
and I try to respond to those pics and articles that I know arent getting many responses....you know to help the littleguy out....I find a lot of great posts that never get read..that really deserve to.
I usually read a post or two from someone wanting to connect...unless they post me a comment....and decide from there.....
gather moves really fast though....well for me

I know exactly what you mean, Lou.... and I too hate to just comment with a Great , or here is a 10 or some such lame remark. I too try to (99% of the time) say something else besides a canned little message. thanks for being a friend. I have known you on-line for about 6 or so years and do hope to meet you someday....same with Joan O in NC!!!

Hi Sonia,
I feel guilty that I have not commented much on your articles because the recipes that I have read are intriguing. I'm not much of a cook, however.

I have fewer thasn 90 connections. At first (when no one read my articles), I accepted everyone who asked. Now, although my readership isn't very big, I am more choosy. When I get a connection request, I go first to the person's profile. Then I look at some of their articles. If I have nothing in commonwith the person or they don't submit the types of articles I am interested in reading, I decline.

I am more inclined to accept a connection from someone who has requested the connection because they liked something I have written or photos I have taken. I request connections to very few people — mainly when I am very impressed by their writing. I find the social aspects of belonging to Gather are great, but my main interest is in writing myself and reading well-written articles.

I suspect wanting lots of connections is related in kind to wanting a big penis or a Hummer.

If we had Oscars for comments, I nominate Kevin Weeks' words as the funniest comment of the year.

To answer your questions:

1-No, I don't connect just to connect. I am usually the one asked and like many Gatherites, I check writings first to see if we would be a good fit or not. I decide from there.

2- Yes, at least one thing in common makes it a smoother fit

3- No, the less connections I have the easier it is for me to get around to read people's articles. Right now, I only have 99 connections and I want to keep it under a hundred. It won't bother me if my connections do not read my articles, I am here as a reader not a writer looking for readers. When people read what I set out, it's an added bonus to the enjoyment I find here on Gather. I'll probably go through my list again and purge names of those who are not writing here anymore.

I love reading your food articles, Sonia, you bring the tropical flavor of home back here for me. I doubt you'd find me disconnecting from you... unless you insist lemons are better than Kalamansisand have a bigger Gulok than I do.

I have 617 connections and I admit that I dont comment on every single article but I try and hit at least one article every couple of weeks. I accept all connections requests. Not because I want to get to 1000 connections but because I am lazy and dont want to hunt around for articles....if someone is connected to me it is easier to find their threads.

I connect with everyone who asks - some people write very interesting articles or put up cool photos and they do it in spurts so it's hard to tell just by looking at their past history what they will do in the future. As for connection requests that I put out: if I keep seeing someone on Gather reading the same things I am, then I'm going to ask to connect. I don't randomly put out connection requests to "collect friends". Many of my first connections aren't active anymore and some of my Northern friends Gather only during the winter because summer is so precious for them - but I don't disconnect when I haven't seen them around for awhile, because many people go and come back with new and fun stories.

Dianne, I didn't do this to make anyone feel guilty.....on the contrary, I was really curious how other people felt about the ones who feel they must connect, connect, connect with as many people as possible...

I don't get to read everything either and sometimes when I read I might not comment if I don't have anything worhtwhile to add...sometimes I get there after many perople have commenting and some of them might exactly what I would have said...;-)

Duckie, you are a breath of fresh air...! I love reading whatever you write and have enjoyed your photo essays tremenduously....Your sense of humor is unique LOL
OK, OK, or the sake of not breaking a great friendship I agree Kalamansis are better than lemons,....even Meyer Lemon (is that thunder and lightning I hear?) and biggest Gulok is probably not as big as yours....!

Lori, I appreciate your comment and point of view ....thank you! I'm habing toubles keeping up with 400, I don't know what I would do with over 600!!!

Jennifer, i too have asked for a connection when I keep stumbling into the same people in articles I am reading...and enjoying...even if not cooking or food related
;-) - although my main focus at gather has been food and cooking, I do enjoy other topics very much....except for all the games (though I might jump in with a comment if the game is interesting enough) and freebies...

I have about 282 connections and consider this way tooooooooo many. Before connecting with anyone I usually checkout their profiles to see if there is anything I'm interested in reading. One thing I've noticed is the fact people have short memories, I only write on average an article a week, if on the day its written I'm not out commenting on everyone elses articles I get very few comments. They seem to forget the times I've commented all week long....

Hi, Lynn....yes that seems to be the norm too.... I also notice that if I go and comment on someone's article, they will almost immediately comment back.... it does take a bit of both to make the Gather world go around...

Well, today has been the longest stretch of time I have been able to give to Gather and my connections....I do feel pretty good, because I have caught up with a few I hadn't 'seen" in a while.

I promise that I will be a better connection to you, my Gather friends....but remember please, I don't always have this much time to spend here....

My sink is full of dishes today that I have completely ignored so I could play in Gather.... Duty calls!

I've got about 100 connections. That many keeps me quite busy. It sounds like people are trying to set goals with connections. Like you, I just don't get it.

The second in my case.

Though, in the last month or two my connections have ballooned and I am not really sure how it happened. When I send connection requests it is usually after I have read something by someone that I really enjoyed and noticed they had similar content.

I have been receiving more connection request lately than I did before, but those people have been commenting on the things I write so I added and keep them. Havent sent out any requests myself in months though.

THere are a few gather members though that I would like to connect with but for whatever reason they did not accept. I can only keep up with so much writing and I am more likely to do so when I see your articles on my list everyday, if not I forget about those people and dont search for them.

Sonia, I've just had a huge burst of disconnecting from people, after a similar burst a few months ago. All in all I culled 400+ plus connections down to just over 90...doing so to keep my sanity. I remained connected to those I have some relationship with.

In answer to your questions, I echo Faith.

I don't understand either, Sonia! I tend to accept requests to connect, - and often check on their names when I do. So many people seem to post games or random, "lite" articles. I'm not interested in games at all, and rarely have time to check more than 10 pages on My Gather" - if that! And I do use the front page of Gather to check on other articles besides food................

These people probably think it means more points to have more connections. But if you never comment on the work of those connections, what is the point? They will stop commenting on yours.

I find that having just under 300 connections is just right.

I have a hard time keeping up with the connections I already have and though I still accept most anyone that asks I never have enough time to go by and see everyone. And that is 322 connections.

As for emails out of the 100s I have received on gather I think less than 10 were acual messages for me!!

love the hummer connection!! LOL "the bigger the muscles the samller the tool?" LOL

Thank you for your input, Bob... I know...I just don't get it!

Sophie, the 2nd makes more sense to me, but I receive some requests from people that when I check their profiles have nothing in common with me... I will connect, because correspondents are asked to, but if after a while I hear nothing else from them, I will disconnect. I only have so much time to give to Gather and why waste it with people with whom I have no affinity?

Magi, you're one of the people that although I am not connected directly with you, I see you and read you quite often because some of my best connections are also yours... Yes, Faith seems to have a good handle on it....BTW, I like your new icon. You always come up with unusual icons that are "graphically pleasing" ;-)

Katrina, my feelings exactly. I hardly ever have time to read much from "articles for me", although I try to sort of scan through them at least 3 pages back.... but I do read the Gather Home Page as a way to keep up with connections and also meeting "new to me" people. Yesterday was unsual as I had more time on my hands to just play at Gather off and on.

Shannon, your second sentence hits it on the head......I'm even thinking that 300 is more than I can handle...;-)

Ana, I think we have reached a consensus here....... We all are thinking along the same lines.....
As to the Gather mail...I know exactly what you mean! I get so much of it that is not personal at all sometimes I feel like just deleting them all without opening them....but then I worry that I might delete a personal message or an important one from someone I really enjoy........so I'm stuck with opening them all hoping that at least 1 or 2 are directed at me personally!

Yeah....our Kevin's sense of humor is unique ;-)))

I hope Anthony is feeling better soon! Bless you both.

Patricia....first, let me say that I have nothing against any of the First Chapter writers....for one thing, I wish I could write fiction as well as most of them/you do....I enjoy reading very much and my tastes are very eclectic, so there are different genre I enjoy very much....What bothers me and what I was commenting on, was that after I left a comment or two on the work of some of the people I had read, I then started getting requests from other FC writers who had seen my comments....when I went to read them and they requested connections, I never heard from them again...except for one to whom I had written a note to please let me know if her work went on to make it as a finalist...she did and of course, I went to read her second chapter...

Thanks for asking aout Anthony....today he is feeling a bit better.

good conversation. I'm definitely in the "2" category in terms of people with whom I initiate a connection. Pretty open to accepting requests as long as there seems to be some semblance of a connection (e.g. they've commented on something of mine or at least an interest area).

;-) Patricia, you're a dear! I would hate to not leave a comment if I read another contest entry, but I understand what you mean!

Hi, David....seems to be the general consesus......I just wonder what is driving the ones who are feverishly trying to reach that "magic" number !!!

I agree with you. I feel guilty because I have a hard time reading all of my connections work. I have little time on gather though. People have to understand that. If someone takes the time to look at my work, I will take time to look at theirs.

In reference to your questions, mark me for D, all of the above. I will connect with anyone. Just cause we don't have the same interests listed, doesn't mean we can't be friends. I may learn something new from them or vice versa.

Thank you for your input Jaye....

My participation in Gather sort of seems to go in quick spurts of activity and a few days of down-time.....depending on my deadline for articles (other than for Gather)
It is not an ideal situation since I sometimes miss works published by some of my connections and it is hard to play catch-up!

Thank you so much for commenting!

1000? I am rapidly coming to the conclusion that there's an inverse relationship between *wanting* a lot of connections and being someone with whom I want to connect? Not to say that anyone with a ton of connections is off my list of potential gather buddies, but to WANT them that badly... What's up with that? There's probably a rumor that Tom G will come visit you if you hit 1000 or something.

1-Do you connect with other members just to connect
NO NO NO

2-Do you connect with someone you seem to have at least something in common?
The only time that I request a connection is when I am reading something *right now* that makes me want to. Almost all of the time I mention *why* I want to connect, like "I was just reading your comments on KEO's phDiet piece. I wanna be your friend." (which is roughly what I sent to sy garte, IIRC)

3-Do you feel that the more connections you have the better?
No. I feel that the better connections I have the more I enjoy Gather.

My period cull of connections is done by scanning 'articles for me' and 'images for me' looking for people who have a poor signal-to-noise ratio. I'm connected to all sorts of folks here, including some gamers and chatters, but I don't have many (any?) who post ONLY games. I'll also kick someone off my list in a heartbeat for copyright violation.

You are one great connection to have, Beth and it is not only because you're a foodie, but because you are one o fthe ones that takes time to comment or answer and mean it.... Thank goodness there are still some like that....and I am blessed to have several as my connections!

I agree with your $#3 response wholeheartedly!

I thank you!

Oh, I forgot to mention....I just read somewhere where a Gatherite posted she wants to reach 3,000 connections.....!

;-)))
curiouser and curiouser..........

1-Do you connect with other members just to connect

NO.

2-Do you connect with someone you seem to have at least something in common?

I connect to people whose articles and comments I have enjoyed.

3-Do you feel that the more connections you have the better?

Absolutely not, but I don't produce much content, preferring to read and occasionally comment. I'm not here to amass points or 3000 "friends". I am at an all time high of 54 connections and about 20 or so subscriptions (after 2 1/2 years here). I couldn't handle more than 100 total.

I don't envy you having to accept connection requests from everyone that asks. There are people here with over 6000 connections!

1 - No
2 - Yes, and they ought to have a compelling reason why they want to connect. I'm very discriminatory and only want contacts with articles and comments I respect in my group. I will, in fact, remove connections who constantly pester me to look at their articles or who demonstrate, over time, no interaction, either with articles they've produced or interesting comments. Right now, I have 48 and I don't aim for more than 50. That's been a good number. When I get a connection request, I often check to see how big their "my people" list is. More than 30 pages, and I have to be very compelled. I figure, I won't be missed.
3 - uh, no.
4 - no.

Oh, Janna...it is hard enough for me to keep up with the ones I have...I cannot imagine having 1000, much less 6000! I'm trying to be a better connection to mine, but I know I fail miserably....!

Good for you, Stephanie! I have had to block some of mine just for the amount of 'read me' mail they send....

When I connect I hope for estimulation interaction... I'm sorry that I can't say I have achieved it with many of them.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me.

Hi, I am bit late putting in my two cents worth. I must be rare on here on Gather. I have yet to post an article and only have a couple of pictures - only because I didn't realize that they could be voted on! (That isn't a hint either - LOL!) I have been a member here for almost a year and I only have 8 friends.....possibly soon to be 7. I only connect with those that I feel write interesting articles....I am NOT in it for the points, I truly like reading what others have to say. If it were not for some interesting articles and the friend that asked me to join, I probably would not be a member anymore.

Elaine, I'm glad to 'hear you' say that....if it weren't that Gather requests I accept all requests for connections from the correspondents, I wouldn't have as many as I have now. There is no way that we can read and comment on everything that all of our connections write. It makes me feel bad that I can't.
At the moment I'm in NC and my hands are full trying to get our parents' place settled.
It has been a bigger job than we siblings had anticipated...
Thank you for reading and comenting!

1-Do you connect with other members just to connect
Never! I only connect with those I have something in common with.

2-Do you connect with someone you seem to have at least something in common?
Of course I do.

3-Do you feel that the more connections you have the better?
No way. In fact some of those who I have been connected to in the past only want to be here for the points! Plain and simple. I received more emails from them asking me to read and rate the stupidest articles and there were many of these emails each and every day. I disconnected from them. I have a life and do not have time to read a two line joke that is not of importance at all.

4-All of the above?

Connie, I feel the same....thanks
I can't wait to be back at Gather fulltime...
It will still be a while before I return home and I don't have much computer time now...