So often we ask the question, "Why, Lord?"
Sometimes there is no answer.
This is one of those times.
On Christmas afternoon a young man threw himself off a building in our city, landing on the pavement below. His young life ended Christmas Day. He grew up with one of our boys.
I first met him when the boys were in kindergarten. Eager and bright, this boy made friends quickly. He and my son Jim became buddies. Their love for music grew along with their friendship, and years later the two found themselves strumming and drumming their hearts out in various bands. They went their separate ways after high school. Every now and then their paths would cross. They crossed just a couple of weeks ago. Everything seemed just fine.
At the wake tonight I hugged his dad tight.
"I don't know what to say," I tearfully told him. "Jim sends his love and he'll be over to see you soon." My son was unable to get out of work in time to attend the wake.
"Just hug him," the dad said to me. "And then hug him again. You still have that chance you know."
His statement reminded me of an old saying. I've heard in many times throughout the years but it has never struck home the way it did tonight.
"There but for the grace of God go I."
When my son came home from work tonight I hugged him. I hugged him until it hurt. I didn't want to let him go.
This young man's parents didn't want to let him go either. I can't begin to imagine the pain they're enduring and will experience in the days, weeks, and months to come.
I don't know the details that culminated in this Christmas tragedy. I do know this, however. When we speak to others, if we speak with kindness, gentleness and sincerity, we won't cause pain. If we think before we speak we're less likely to have regrets. And if we offer a word of praise, encouragement or simply love...it may make a profound difference in a way we'll never understand.
I don't know if a word could have made a difference. In honor of this bright, talented and handsome young man and his grieving family I vow to spread some kindness. I'll say some prayers and I'll hold his memory dear.
Is there someone that maybe you could touch in this very same way?
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Comments: 21
Thank you for sharing this story and I know it must be the hardest thing for a Mother and Father to go thru.
It is really sad to hear how many young people are not happy and they just want to end their lives. Simple words may make wonders and help others feel they are loved.
Thank you for sharing
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I simply can't find the words but I'll try to add what little I can. We had a friend who husband simply hugged her and their son and walked out the door and then threw himself off the top of a building later in the day. No warning, no explanation. He had once struggled with depression, ten years earlier. He told no one when it returned. That is their guess.
My heart goes out to you and to this family. If it is any comfort I did want to add that some teens or young adults feel too ashamed of what they are feeling to reveal it to their parents. I hope this family can heal without blaming themselves unduly or by beating themelves up with guilt or pain. Sometimes, as you note, there are simply no clear reasons or answers. But there is your support and your comfort and I'm betting you are one very compassionate friend for them.
I lost a brother -in-law to sucide and it's so hard to deal with. It isn't anyones fault
God Bless
i'm sorry for your family too, Kimberly... i can't imagine the loss...
May God Bless everyone affected by this tragedy...