This from the Non-News News Room:
Despite the claims of politically correct politico, Bret W, that the war against Chapter Whores/Pimps is draining precious resources from the Gather economy (Bret, get a grip. Have you seen the "Most Discussed" list? Those ten articles alone are sapping the strength out of this web site!), Generalissimo Kris M has decided to step up the squashing of insurgents by instituting a "surge" - likely to occur sometime in the next few hours.
Since General Petraeus has his hands full in the Iraqi theater, Kris has had to fall back on Plan B in this War Against Chapter Whores/Pimps.
That's right, she has decided to unleash the fiercest weaponry in the Internet: she has called to duty the "dreaded" Susies/Suzies/Soosies/Swoosies/Siouxys.
Draft notices are going out in G-mail even as we speak.
It's not known what the exact mission is, but the Susies are likely to go underground to perform guerilla tactics in the Whore War. Headed by ex-Green Beret veteran Susie San Souci, the Susies will make dash and grab reconnaissance missions into the belly of the beast, namely, the article listing the Round Two winners.
This war is turning out to be funnier than a barrel full of Evil Monkeys.
According to Bret W, he is "hard on whores"; however, in looking at his record, we've seen no indication that this is the case. There is no comment yet from pacifist, Bret W, but since his wife is out of town and he's full of it, I'm sure that we will be non-reporting a response in no time.