The OB/GYN doctor has decided to take me off all my contraction medication at the 35 week mark (Wednesday, the 26th) and I'm very nervous and scared about this. After writing my previous article about nurses telling me to hold off till 37 weeks for stopping labor, (so they consider this the safe zone) and my doctor thinking 35 weeks to be alright quite worries me.
Asked my OB/GYN about whether she would come out okay or be alright and he told me he couldn't guarantee this for no child which makes me worry that his option for me going off medication on Wednesday is a bad choice in a doctor's view. Now I ask myself why he is doing such a thing and is it possible that he is tired of me as a patient and just wants my baby to be born? My man tells me I'm blowing this one out of proportion, but then again, I'm worried about my little girl's health (well, according to ultrasound, she weighed almost 6 lbs at 33 weeks), so perhaps, she will be a big baby.
Not only did he recommend going off all medication, he also then surprised me and told me that I wouldn't be having a C-section like he promised me due to my high stress and anxiety. I've been crying non-stop that such a doctor would promise such a thing and I prepare for C-section and now, I have little time to prepare for natural birth? I had my anxiety and stress on ease for a C-section and my man told me : 'this, this, and this will happen,' and now a natural birth? I'm lost. My man cannot tell me what will be expected in a natural birth. A natural birth is so much change- it worries me and I know I will be crying and scared at the hospital and now I feel like the doctor is letting me down and it makes me frustrated that he promised me something to help my anxiety and stress and now, I feel like he may be angry at me and cause me more pain and agony, knowing very well about my other health conditions: Bipolar Disorder, Autism, and ADHD. I'm very scared about this birth now and everyday I cry and worry if my baby will get stuck (due to other doctor's telling me previously I wouldn't be able to have children) and now I worry my baby might get stuck or an infection (due to me having a urinary infection that no doctor can figure out) and I know I don't want to pass this on to my child. And I also know that if something happens to my child, that I will blame myself for life. I just know that natural birth is something I cannot handle with my stress levels and I will flip out and my hospital stay will just turn out to be a disaster. I know my limits and for this doctor to promise me something and then tell me different really upsets me due to me thinking my hospital stay would be less stressful. Now that the doctor is putting me in this position makes my stress levels go up -- both for his decision to stop medication next Wed and to also to put his decision off of C-Section.
---- I believe ultimately he decided not to do a C-section because the nurses kept telling me later within my pregnancy that it wasn't in the system for a C-section (after he promised me). I think the nurses had a big influence on him changing his decision, due to them being upset with me when I mentioned C-section birth.
Now from this stress, my blood pressure has been up, but I've refused to say anything to my doctor, due to feeling like he doesn't care about my overall care anymore, and I also feel like I don't want this birth to happen and I'd rather it progress longer because the thought of natural birth is VERY humilating to me (seems like a nightmare) and I can't stop having nightmares about going into labor and going natural and now I can't stop crying as I've wrote this article. I'm so scared and I don't think I will no longer go by his doctor order's next Wed on stopping this contraction medication. I talked to my man about getting another OB/GYN to do a C-section and my man told me, this rarely would happen and not many doctor's would want to do one with my history. I'm just so scared. In a way, the doctor makes me feel so scared, that I feel like I don't want this birth to even happen anymore. It's too much stress for me to handle and I tried telling my doctor this. ::Sighs:: .... ::Crying non-stop:: My stomach is beginning to hurt. Hopefully I won't go into labor soon with this stress.
It would have made me feel more at ease if I would have had more notice in advance about natural birth and now, labor can happen anytime soon (next week or two) and I'm unprepared on my anxiety/stress levels for this type of birth. I know my limits and as I've stated, I know natural birth is not the right choice for me.
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Comments: 37
I have bipolar too. So I understand your anxieties. Your emotions are running amuck because of hormones during pregnancy. You need to create a focal point and concentrate HARD on it. Nothing else matters. Concentrate on your baby. You will have a healthy baby...so relax and give your body the ability to do what it is designed to do. You will deliver a healthy baby.
Personally, I would not go to another doctor at this late stage. I would tough this one out. Trust that he is using his judgment for you good and for the good of the baby. Prayer will do more good than worry at this stage.
Lots of hugs to you!
My oldest daughter was born at 36 weeks. 5 lbs., 7 oz.; 18" long. She was/is healthy as a horse. 5'8" and brilliant.
I do believe that if you have concerns, you should talk to your doctor.
Get some sleep and take care of yourself. Baby is going to take up a lot of time and energy.
Peace!
I have given birth natural two times, the first time with an epidural, and I honestly did not feel much after the epidural took effect. If you are going to have a natural child birth, I would definitely suggest that you talk to your doctor about having an epidural.
Just think our your baby & your health & be guided....
Peace and happiness for you and yours during the holidays and to come.
It's going to all right. You are going to do fine. Try not to cross bridges before you get there, okay! Hugs, Heather
As for c-section v. vaginal birth - I'd never, ever choose a c-sect. The risks are higher, and it's major surgery. Of course if you need one, you need one, and it's the best option in that case. There are many different kinds of drugs you can try - you don't have to have natural (unmedicated) childbirth just because you're having a vaginal birth. Some women who have epidurals never feel much of anything during the entire birthing process.
Good luck!
I just noticed where you live. I lived there for a year in the early 50s. I don't remember much about it except I thought it was a nice place.
I sympathize, as I once had a doctor agree with my birth plan but when I arrived at the hospital in labor he scoffed, saying "you're on MY turf now, you'll do what I say."
My best recommendation is that if there is any way to drop this doctor, do so. YOU MUST TRUST AND FEEL CONFIDENT IN YOUR DOCTOR. Childbirth is very personal, very hard, and deserves the proper support.
I'm adding you to the latest link of the prayer chain... and BTW... I had a baby at 35 weeks and she was fine because they gave her the shots to develop her lungs. I have faith that your baby will be fine, too.
You may not want to hear this, but a C-Section is much harder to recover from than a vaginal birth. It involves cutting your abdominal muscles and stitching or stapling them back together... lotta pain for longer than recovering from natural childbirth. I've had both. Doctors don't like to rule out a vaginal birth unless the baby's breech or mother has hypertension.
I've been through natural child birth 5 times - believe me, you are stronger than you think! In the end, the doctor may feel that natural child birth is better for the baby, but if you truly want a C-section, he should listen to your concerns and discuss the options rationally with you.I also have to agree with Pam - a vaginal birth is so much easier to recover from than a C-section, which is significant surgery. If you can bear it, it really is the way to go.
I also am concerned about you mentioning the high blood pressure - this is a serious issue for your health and your baby's. Your blood pressure should be checked during each visit, as a matter of course, so hopefully, though you don't want to say anything to your doctor, if it is a problem it will be discovered.
I encourage you to contact the maternity ward of your local hospital, and pose some of the questions you're asking. They are usually very helpful, and used to nervous, first-time mothers. Remember, there are no stupid questions!
It is possible that your baby reached a size and development, that though you aren't at '37 weeks', the doctor feels the risks of the medications outweigh the risks of a slightly premature birth. The doctor has only your and the baby's best interests in mind - if only because he doesn't want a malpractice suit on his hands. If you don't trust him, then perhaps it is past time to at least talk to another OB/GYN to get another opinion. If it helps with your anxiety about the impending birth, it's probably worth it.
I'll be thinking about you! Hugs and kind thoughts abound from this and many other corners.
Take care!
God will make sure everything is just perfect...
try not to worry... please be calm...
I asked this, obviously, to make a point about how horrible pregnancy can be if a person is autistic or has special The teacher said, "James, this doesn't happen because if a woman flips out they automatically put her on an epidural or knock her out."
I'm highly skeptical. I can only assume historically, when there were no epidurals and anesthetic was not the way it is now, things were a lot different.
Pregnancy is no fun, especially for a person with autism. I suggest that you write an essay for an autism newsletter about how horrible this has been for you? Why? Because I've yet to read anything in the literature about how difficult pregnancy can be for autistic people, let alone anything regarding girl issues and autism. Write about this...get it published in a newsletter! I've got many newsletters who'd love to hear your story.
I shall end this comment with a quote from a romance novel written by my mother, "Tis only what our mother did to give life to us." Of course, that doesn't make it any less difficult or more easy, but it is a unique perspective about what is going to happen to you.
Ultimately, the choice is up to you. My mother gave me her two cents. I'm not female, so I'll never get pregnant, but I suggest that you do what you know in your heart is right. If that means a C-section, then you should do it. You are autistic, so a natural birth may be very difficult for you, and you might be able to deal with the healing process of a C-section instead.