DADVENTURE: What Puzzles Dad

One of my kids approaches me with a request.  He or she knows that there is a range of possible outcomes, from getting ignored to getting referred to another adult to actually getting me off my butt and away from the computer for a few minutes.  It is the latter response that teaches me something about my parenting values.

I know, for example, that requests to play ball or to read will almost always be honored.  I don't feel like I can turn down a request to toss the baseball or the Frisbee, and still be a self-respecting dad.  Requests to play soccer are borderline.

As a writer, I can hardly get away with saying "no" to a kid requesting storytime, though I discovered recently that I am not above attempts to sub out the reading to another kid.  Getting my oldest to read to the younger kids is a win-win in my opinion.  Besides being really, really cute.

My youngest, Coop, revealed another sure-fire dad motivator – puzzles.  At some level I must think that jigsaw puzzles do amazing things for children's developing brains, though I can't for the life of me remember reading any research to that effect.  I know that I must be convinced of the life-giving, intellect-stimulating power of the jigsaw puzzle because there is no blog, video, email, chore, conversation with my wife, or cocktail preparation that I will not instantly walk away from the moment my youngest son asks me to help him with a puzzle.

The downside here is that Coop has become obsessed with puzzles.  Is this in response to my reaction to his requests for help?  Did I overcook him with the puzzles thing?  If things in the house get suddenly quiet, you can almost be assured that he has slipped back into his room for a little private time with the Jurassic Jumbo Floor Puzzle.  So the requests for help are coming at a pretty steady clip.  If you sent me an email recently and I didn't get back to you, I was probably giving an assist on the firetruck or school bus 12-piece.

And look out if there is a piece missing.

Maybe what I find so compelling is the clarity of his frustrations as he tries to force a piece into place, or his utter satisfaction when the Triceratops' head finds his body.  The way he tamps in the fitting pieces three times with his fingertips -- completely intoxicating to me.  Why is "watching the wheels turn" so much fun?

Whatever the cause, I just hope that his enthusiasm lasts out the weekend, because contrary to my vehement advice to all parents, I am traveling on Thanksgiving.  Not very far, and by car.  But yes, we're traveling, and the weather is expected to be horrible.  So despite a freakishly warm fall (somebody call Al Gore) that has featured steady temperatures in the June-July range, the minute we are scheduled to close the sliding doors on the minivan and head to the confines of a hotel, the temperature should be dropping like a rock.  Which is why I say avoid travel during the holidays.

Why I don't heed my own advice is a puzzle that may never be solved.

What are the requests that get you to drop everything?


Clay Nichols, Family Correspondent:
Clay’s column, Dadventure, published twice monthly to Gather Essentials: Family, is a sure-fire guide to raising flawless, perfectly behaved, and always obedient children.  Yeah, right.
 
Clay is the co-author of Filmmaking for Teens: Pulling Off Your Shorts, an award-winning playwright, and the Chief Creative Officer at DadLabs.com, a fatherhood website.