I awoke early this morning, perhaps around four and silently went down the stairs in stocking feet. Going into the computer room, I brought up Gather and read my private emails. Then off I went to check out a poem posted by Magi called "Azrael's Shadow". Reading it twice, I found much to contemplate but did not feel comfortable commenting at that point. Too much to think about and my mind was still fuzzy from not enough sleep and so I returned upstairs and climbed under the comforter, and though I know not why, sleep came easily once more.
Shortly after 6, I arose once again and went downstairs, started the coffee, fed the kitties waiting at the door and mixed up some fine Alpo dog food for Tuck. While the coffee was perking, the animals eating, I pulled up "Azrael's Shadow" once more and reread it several times. How do I comment? What do I say? Do I speak from the heart, from what I know or should I just leave
an innoculous comment? By now, Tuck's head was on my lap, eyes looking up, beseeching me that he could care less why I was sitting quietly at the computer, his needs were far greater... a good romp in the bogs was what he needed. And so, over my pajamas, I put on my heavy LL Bean jacket, a hat to cover my ears, camera and "dog treats" in my pocket and headed out on an early morning stroll. The thermometer on the side of the house read 28 degrees as I left the house...rather nippy morning for a stroll so early. I crossed over to the bogs and the reservoir behind and noticed beautiful reflections in the water...reflections that mirrored my own thinking.
"Solitude is a silent storm that breaks down all our dead branches. Yet it sends our living roots deeper into the living heart of the living earth. Man struggles to find life outside himself, unaware that the life he is seeking is within him." Kahil Gibran
I continue my stroll past Blue Heron Island for did I not name this little spit of land in the middle of the reservoir over ten years ago, the morning after Aaron's death, when I saw my first blue heron, proudly standing here. Having never seen a blue heron, except in pictures, did I not think it was a message from my boy that all was well .
Though I walk in silence, my companion is not far away. Every now and again, Tuck stops and looks back at me. I wonder what he is thinking on this cold, brisk day.
Tuck is amazed with the change in the far off reservoir that sits in the shade...a thin glaze of ice is on the surface.
Is it not true that a thin glaze such as this might cover our eyes so that what we see and know might not really be reality? If we were to break through this glaze, might another reality present itself? These are the thoughts I contemplate this morn. Leaving the low ground, I go up to the forest above, not willing yet to return home.
Seems another companion has joined our walk. Sophia tiptoes lightly between Tuck's legs and then murmurs something in his ear. As I watch my four legged friends converse, I smile. Yes, we all need fellow earth travelers as companions to guide us home.
Companions that will walk with us...some for a short time...and some for a longer time on our life path... each offering love and comfort and perhaps some knowledge of who we are and why we are here.