I NEED YOUR REACTIONS RE NEW BOOK TITLE

                 FRUSTRATED ATTEMPTS TO PUBLISH MY MEMOIR - UPDATE

BACKGROUND

As a budding psychotherapist in l966 I got a break to be a "psychologist" in an innovative therapeutic community - Odyssey House - treating heroin addicts. For the first 6 months of the 17 months I worked there I thought I had luckily stumbled upon my own personal and vocational 'Garden of Eden.'

It was run by a 35 year woman who was both a Psychiatrist and a Lawyer. Because she was dynamic, creative, imaginative, highly intelligent, innovative, and dramatic I eagerly looked forward to each new challenging day with eager anticipation to return once again  onto the front lines of the 'war' on drug addiction.

My excitement, enthusiam, and all out effort continued unflaggingly until I experienced a series of five increasingly inappropriate so called 'therapeutic' but actual abuses of authority  stirring troubling mixed feelings about the true nature of Odyssey House. I was plunged into intense doubt as to whether the center was helping or hurting the recovering addicts as well as myself.

 In an attempt to sort out the wheat from the chaff I appointed myself the unofficial scribe of Odyssey House keeping a detailed journal of critical events. One such 'critical' event that pushed my doubts to the max was the Psychiatrist' s decision to hold a group encounter of a delicate female patient in the final stage of recovery with the purpose of inducing a schizophrenic breakdown to show how unworthy she would be marrying a rehabilitated ex addict counselor.

Although I had considered leaving Odyssey during the 6th month I found myself 'paralyzed' - unable to determine what was good from what was bad. The truth is that my working at Odyssey stirred an intense mixture of good/bad experiences of my growing up when I felt equally unable to break out of a parallel doubting mania.

It took thirty five years and an eleven year psychoanalysis to feel as if I had done sufficient justice in understanding what attracted me to Odyssey, and most importantly what kept me there despite my increasing doubts, disgust, and rage witnessing an escalating array of abuses of professional authority.

 I completed my memoir approximately two years ago, secured an agent, and began sending it out for possible publication.

 Considering the book is about the continuing popular theme of drug addiction and rehabilitation; is a truthful account of what happened during my 17 month stay; is a dramatic page turner; penetrates the surface of who becomes a drug addict and what consittutes effective versus ineffective treatment; is a complex multilayered mixture of themes including science, depth psychology, speculative philosophy, spirituality, and power politics; and is as relevant today as it was thirty five years ago I thought that I couldn't miss enticing one or more publishers to call me up as soon as they read my obligatory two chapters and summary. I also added a detailed 85 page marketing plan of probable libraries, treatment programs, psychological conventions, psychological associations, etc. that would most likely be interested in buying at least one copy of my book.

WHERE THINGS STAND NOW

So much for my fantasies of the instantaneous fulfillment of my [grandiose?] dreams of glory.

The twelve rejections I have received so far have in the main been encouraging. Many of them have characterized my proposed book as 'compelling." But most of them have said that although I have an important story to tell they just don't know how to market it. Many have added the tag line "I'm just not in love with it enough." [Ugh]

To relate the nature of my specific reactions is not worth mentioning. To bitch about what I believe to be the sad state of the publishing world particularly for a first time author who really has something original to say and also writes about it in an original way is, I think, a waste of time and energy and will probably be dismissed as just a theme and variation of  self serving diatribe by another of a long list of frustrated unpublished authors. Perhaps the anticipated criticism is accurate. However, it is equally accurate to state that I am certain that I have written an important and well written memoir and will keep persisting in publishing my manuscript one way or another. It will either be published by a conventional author or I will eventually self publish it.

However since the stark reality is that if I continue to go the conventional route then I guess I will have to figure out a way that will induce some resonant publisher to indeed fall in love with my work.

To that end I had an epiphany the other day about what I think would be a more compelling title. The one I have been submitting is:

                                       SMACK  INSIDE REHAB:

                   My Odyssey Treating Heroin Addicts in the Sixties                                                               

 My newest idea is:                                         

                                  DO STARS SHINE ALL THE TIME?     

                    My Odyssey Treating Heroin Addicts in the Sixties   

I welcome any and all comments about which title you prefer and your associations to them. There is, of course, a story associated with the stars title which I will relate in a future article but for now I want to see if the title is able to stand on its own.

Thank you for your continuing encouragement, and invaluable help.