Oh no! I've lost the sperm!

“The Sperm”

I think I may have been a little too open with my children about the baby making process. There have been a lot of questions flying around as we’ve recently added another child to our circus. Obviously, my girls (who are about to turn 5) don’t know what sex is, but they know that the mom has the egg, the dad has the sperm, and when the two come together they make a baby. So here is our resent conversation…

Twinkie#2: Mom, I can’t wait to get married and have a baby. How old do I have to be?

Me: *choking on my drink* I don’t know, like 20, at least.

Twinkie#2: Well, I can have a baby before I’m married, right? *now my eyes are bulging out of my head and I’m stuttering for words*

At this point Twinkie#1 chimes in: No sis, you can’t have a baby till after you’re married cuz the boy has to give you “the sperm”!

*Light bulb comes on* Twinkie#2: Oh yeah! *now distress* Mom! What if I lose “the sperm”?

Aww…the joys of young ‘uns! At this point there’s milk coming out of my nose and I’m starting to worry how many of her friends she has talked to about “the sperm”! I mean, what do I say to that, really?

Comments: 14

♥ Carleen♥ Equality NOT discrimination ♥ G soon to be W♥ Oct 12, 2007, 12:51am EDT

lol. That was one interesting conversation you had with your kids.

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Nicole*sugarbear* P. Oct 12, 2007, 12:52am EDT

out of the mouths of babes! thank you for sharing Im rolling in laughter! I can picture you face so well milk and all!

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Janet H. Oct 12, 2007, 1:05am EDT

One time I was in K-mart with my 5 year old son and newborn baby. A man joking with my son, asked him "How did you get that cute baby?" Well, my son told the man the WHOLE story, beginning to end, and didn't leave anything out! The man thought it was hilarious but I wanted to drop through the floor and my face must have been 5 shades of red.

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Ericka C. Oct 12, 2007, 1:11am EDT

Unfortunately, this is funny because it's true! I have two third graders and an 8 month old baby. When you have two, it's like their curiosity is multiplied instead of being added together because they can work things out and ask more stuff and then they gang up on you . . . My son asked how dad's sperm got to my egg if we don't have *whisper* "S-E-X?"

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Keva B. Oct 12, 2007, 1:21am EDT

hahaha! my little sister asked actually asked my why I needed birth control if I wasn't trying to have a baby! she really believe sex was only for procreation! my dad was sitting right there and just about dying of embarrassment trying to explain why we actually have sex!!!

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Steph-in-NE ..... Oct 12, 2007, 1:26am EDT

that was good,, my daughter is due in april and my gson is telling everyone that mommy having lots of babies so she can share,, 1 for me,1 for dad,1 for mom

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Sarah C. Oct 12, 2007, 2:14am EDT

I;m avoiding all such converations. lol My twins are almost 6... dh let them watch the episode of LOST where the woman had her baby... THANKS, DARLING!
Now, I'm getting questions of... "but, how does the baby come out? WHERE does the baby come out?"

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Helen C.D.~2009 ~. Oct 12, 2007, 2:23am EDT

Just go with the flow mom. This was an hysterical read. At 5 years old they sure know more than mine did at that age. What makes me laugh even more is that each have opposing opinions! You should keep a journalof theses two charms. It will make a great book someday. :)

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penni d. Oct 12, 2007, 8:12am EDT

Ditto, thought it was GREAT>>>>spit out my COFFEE,laughed so hard!!!
Now, what are you going to tell them when they cry about the other 360plus possibilities that ..died in the stream, so to speak? lol....good luck !

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Keva B. Oct 13, 2007, 12:44am EDT

yes, I actually am working on a book of stories about life as a wife and mother. too many funny things happen in our house for me to not share!

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Charles B. Oct 13, 2007, 12:52am EDT

I happen to agree that to many funny things happen in our house not to share, just try to leave all the embarrasing ones about me out of it. But then it would be a pretty boring book, because just about everything I do is embarrasing.

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