Growing up, I was always told that I was shy. I admit that I was not a talkative one. To this day I am not the talkative one in a group. I used to believe that I was shy. When people say someone is shy it is always as a negative. But what is wrong with being shy. I am an observer. I like to watch others. I like to be introspective and reflective. Shyness is timid. But what is wrong with being contemplative about what is going on around you and yourself.
My sister was never quiet. My mom would always ask why couldn’t I be like that. Why did my parents compare us children at times and not take each child’s qualities as their own? I had friends, not tons, but the ones I had were good friends. Maybe I didn’t always speak up for myself always, but I was never taken advantage of.
One time, my friend and I, went for a job. I was probably around 18, just out of high school, the summer before college. Now we are very similar in temperament which is probably why we are such best friends. It took us 20 minutes to get up the nerve to go in that door. We didn’t know what was on the other side and we were scaredy cats, but we did go in eventually.
I used to think I had do something to change. But I realized that I don’t need to change anything about my temperament. It is part of my personality. And to change that would be to change me. When it was necessary, I took the initiative to change my life, on my terms when I wanted to. I went to college. I moved out on my own, and I moved many miles away from home.
I am still shy by definition standards. But I am ok with who I am. So who really cares?
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Comments: 24
As long as you are comfortable with who you are, then that is all that matters. It is amazing what you can learn about people and your surroundings when you take time to smell the flowers in a matter of speaking.
I have always been shy as well and that was reinforced by several abusive people in my life. I was an observer too and have always had a handful of life long friends rather than lots of aquaintances.
Don't get me wrong I am a strong person and I am proud of that. I can handle most situations that come my way but I still hang back and watch in social situations and discussions. It is not fear really, like you said its just who I am. I am a listener and like to take things in before I speak.
Unfortunately like Marilyn I was often labeled "stuck up", especially in school and nothing could be farther than the truth. Plus I was a book worm and made a point of dressing as I liked rather than what was in. I guess I didn't make it easy on myself.
I do open up when I am with people that I am used to and comfortable with. Then you can't shut me up!