by Sophiya S.
Member since:
January 7, 2007

Patience?

September 15, 2007 12:20 AM EDT
views: 67 | comments: 76

Why does it seem so difficult at times to keep our cool? Why do we run out of patience so easily at times? We only raise our risks of a coronary heart attack or possibly an ulcer. Yet, it's so easy to get so caught up in the moment. What are your suggestions or tips and tricks to avoid feeling this way? What do you reccomend? any suggestions greatly appreciated
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Comments: 76

Rita j. Sep 15, 2007, 12:21am EDT
I'm having the same problem trying to learn patience. I'm learning I pray everynight for it.
M C. Sep 15, 2007, 12:21am EDT
Deep breaths and counting to 10 :) There is a concept I've read about before of "detaching one's self from the outcomes"...that way you're not so much expecting things and disappointed if the results dont come..
Sophiya S. Sep 15, 2007, 12:24am EDT
glad i'm not the only one
Sophiya S. Sep 15, 2007, 12:24am EDT
thanks for the tips
Carolyn G. Sep 15, 2007, 12:25am EDT
My daughter should learn some patience. I joke with her saying that she has to have lots of patience because she's never used any of it; by now she must have accumulated a lifetime suppy.
Birdee F. Sep 15, 2007, 12:28am EDT
Yeah I know I have had my share of temper tantrums...& people wonder why their kids have tempers....I have seen my boy grunt like I do or do that sigh like I have :o( Ugggh I just need to calm down!
Kelly M. Sep 15, 2007, 12:30am EDT
I have 6 kids - so many people say I have the patience of a saint. No - I just can tune people out easily! LOL!
jane K. Sep 15, 2007, 12:32am EDT
patient on the outside, impatient on the inside = basket case
Shaunee C. Sep 15, 2007, 12:37am EDT
I have the same problem with patience and worry.
Charlotte Babb Maven-Fairy Godmother Sep 15, 2007, 12:43am EDT
I am working on remembering that it is not about me. Most of the time when I get upset, I think the other prson is attacking me. Even if they are, if I can see it as being their problem, I can stay calmer. It also helps to have a meditation routine, exercise, or a way of releasing the thoughts that things "SHOULD " be different than they are.

It's not easy.
Kathy W. Sep 15, 2007, 12:45am EDT
I do the count 5 blessings thing. I'm not religious, but I find that if I can find 5 good things to think about for about 30 seconds...it works. Sometimes reduced to little things like: My shoes match. I'm glad someone invented spackle for walls (7 teenagers in the house...) There is wine for later tonight. or the Scarlet O'Hara method of "I'll think about THAT tomorrow..." The best thing however, is to cultivate the "hmmmmm." (Long exhale... or big sigh...just remember to INhale again.

It is really truly a blessing to do the deep breathing thing...like Sheryl says. Breathing deep also offers another plus. You can't say anything you'll regret later if you are doing the 5 second inhale, 10 second exhale thing.

Hang in there. Time alone will teach it to you. I've heard, too, that you should not pray for patience, as your god has a great sense of humor, and will just give you further opportunities to learn it...

In Peace and harmony (please?)
Wilka
Steph-in-NE ..... Sep 15, 2007, 1:16am EDT
just turn and walk away,, count to 10 or just smile and think of something happy
Heidianna "Coriander" T. Sep 15, 2007, 1:39am EDT
When I get this upset with something, I need to do something else. Even if that means taking a walk, running, reading, coming to Gather... hehe.... I have to distract myself for a moment, because I get so caught up in things. AND, if I change what I'm doing, I am still keeping busy, and not as impatient!
Cristina S. Sep 15, 2007, 3:31am EDT
Deep breaths are great! Counting to 10 helps too!

You know this one perhaps:

Dear God, grant me patience - RIGHT NOW!
Lela M. Sep 15, 2007, 3:54am EDT
I ask myself, ten years down the road does it really matter? Will anybody care? Usually, it doesn't matter and then I have to let it go.
Lisa Frost Sep 15, 2007, 5:35am EDT
I have been learning the hard way to just let things go and not let them get to me. If I didn't, my system triggers a funny response, all my veins and arteries open up, and I pass out! Not having a system the controls the heart rate and blood pressure like it is supposed to do, so I can't get overly emotional, it has a nasty side effect..!
Jerry S. Sep 15, 2007, 7:22am EDT
Take a breath and count to 10.
1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10
That's better.
Denise B. Sep 15, 2007, 9:24am EDT
it takes time but you have to retrain yourself to not let those things bother you so much. It is not easy. good luck.
Jodi G. Sep 15, 2007, 10:37am EDT
deep breaths and positive thinking
Haywood Jablomie Sep 15, 2007, 1:16pm EDT
Patience is really hard. Hey, where's your picture?
Charlene K. Sep 15, 2007, 2:27pm EDT
I've been running out of patience with my son latley. He's such a brat in public. I used to get so embarrassed which would stress me out even more but latley I've just been telling myself that oh well he's just a kid and people can just deal with it. That's helped a little.
Christle G. Sep 15, 2007, 5:13pm EDT
I keep my cool by realizing that though I do not have control over others, or how they react, I do have control over how I feel and react. I choose how I want to feel about things that happen, I don't let the emotion choose me. I guess it's sort of a control thing. The deep breath thing can help remain in control, so you can make a good decision as well.
William M. Sep 15, 2007, 5:52pm EDT
When you start to get overexcited just think, this is not doing any good.
Nan G. Sep 15, 2007, 10:13pm EDT
LMAO at prozac. sorry

I lives are so filled with stress. It is a bad or worse to hold it in as to let it out. I am not very patient nor am I afraid to just walk away.
golds g. Sep 15, 2007, 10:41pm EDT
inhale slowly exhale do this till your calm and relaxed usually teake 3 tomes
Alainia~ Tha one n only~ a. Sep 15, 2007, 11:27pm EDT
I don't have the best patience! I am working on it though. I try repeating myself 3 times why I am mad. That way I can see usually it is for no reason!
Lauren C. Sep 15, 2007, 11:42pm EDT
There's a site, www.centerpointe.com, that puts out cds... they've been awesome for me. The idea is synchronizing the two sides of your brain... they explain it better than I can, all I can say is it's working for me. (And I have no financial interest in that company.)


Safe Sex and Home Repair
Katie D. Sep 16, 2007, 3:38am EDT
A friend had as her sig for a long time this lovely saying which isn't useful at all but it sorta fits in: Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. and I know it needs more punctuation, but I haven't a clue where. :)
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:05am EDT
we can all learn more about patience
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:05am EDT
I know the feeling Birdee
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:06am EDT
wonderful kelly
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:08am EDT
meditation should help too. i tried it, but had trouble staying in a routine
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:08am EDT
thanks for the tips
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:10am EDT
i never thought of it that way. that's a great tip!
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:16am EDT
haha, Kathy you crack me up. I will do the 5 blessing thing also. I, like you, am not religious, but its nice to find things your grateful for
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:17am EDT
i will check out the site
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:18am EDT
haywood, i wish i knew what happened. it appears to come and go. it walks away, then comes back. just another gather glitch. hehe
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:19am EDT
breathing exercises help a ton
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:19am EDT
thanks for the info.
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:20am EDT
thankfully, my photo is back on now. hopefully, it won't go anywhere now.
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:21am EDT
great way of thinking Charlene!
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:22am EDT
Thanks for the great advice
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:22am EDT
Great quote Katie!
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:23am EDT
you just can't let the little things get to you
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:24am EDT
yeah holding it in, or walking away from the person or problem shouldn't really help either
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:24am EDT
thanks
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:25am EDT
Christle, you have given me the best advice I have received so far
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:25am EDT
thanks so much
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:26am EDT
thanks a ton
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:26am EDT
great tips everyone!
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:27am EDT
thank you
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:27am EDT
wonderful advice
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:28am EDT
being in control of the situation is essential
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:28am EDT
thanks
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:28am EDT
thanks
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:28am EDT
thanks
Spencer T. Sep 16, 2007, 8:40am EDT
Christle G and I are similar. I remind myself that it matters not what the other person says or does I am th eone in control of me. I do not wish to give the power of my emotions to others. As a result I feel or think I feel a higher comfort level and do not let so many of life's daily PIBs (Pains In the Butt) get under my skin. If I did I know I would be a wreck with constant responses to uncontrolled negative stimuli from others. insensitive, rude people or obnoxious people can get on your nerves.
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 8:56am EDT
that's very helpful
Christle G. Sep 16, 2007, 9:15am EDT
EXACTLY Spencer. I think alot of people don't want to admit that they are in control of their own feelings and emotions. It's easier to blame others for that, but then we are handing over control to them, which doesn't sit well with me. It seems like a simple thing to believe, but it really does improve the quality of your life. I hope it helps Sigriet.
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 9:26am EDT
thanks Christle. I appreciate your help
James B. Sep 16, 2007, 9:30am EDT
I just try to realize that it doesn't really matter, when driving if you are in hurry and speed, tail gate, etc what does it save you a handful of seconds? When in a checkout line if you worry about which line is moving faster it gives you aggravation instead of just enjoying the moment.
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 9:38am EDT
great tips
El Toro Bravo de Amor Sep 16, 2007, 1:30pm EDT
Because we forget

all time is borrowed.
Sophiya S. Sep 16, 2007, 6:34pm EDT
very good answer
Nicole M. Sep 16, 2007, 11:23pm EDT
I just take a few deep breaths and think of how much easier it will be not to get into any BS with somebody. The aggravating situation is usually over more quickly that way!
Sophiya S. Sep 17, 2007, 8:27am EDT
thanks
Jerri H. Sep 17, 2007, 4:41pm EDT
I close my eyes and take a deep breath....picturing the bad stuff going out with the air.... and then I giggle ;)
Sophiya S. Sep 17, 2007, 6:36pm EDT
great response
Amanda S. Sep 17, 2007, 6:52pm EDT
I rarely had much patience for things that seemed to frustrate me until I started learning to play the piano,having to practice for a minimum of 1 hour a day taught me how to be patient real quick,and as for when my brother used alot of language that I didn't like I bribed him to quit using swear words when he's talking to me,I got off cheap,he's 17 and still likes cheap stuff like Hotwheels cars and stuff I know he'll like from yard sales.
Sophiya S. Sep 17, 2007, 6:59pm EDT
i've always wanted to learn how to play the piano. i'm glad it has helped you with patience
Jerri H. Sep 18, 2007, 1:08am EDT
People tease me cause I laugh alot....when I am scared...angry...happy...etc...it is a way I deal with it....and the person who may be ticking me off usually stops when I do ;)
Sophiya S. Sep 18, 2007, 3:26pm EDT
Laughter is so healing
Parker S. Dec 30, 2008, 4:00pm EST
Thanks for sharing

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