by
Laura B.
Member since:
August 21, 2007
once a spring treasure
August 25, 2007 05:02 PM EDT
views: 77
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rating: 10/10
(11 votes)
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comments: 17
yellow birches, red maples, and old old oaks offer their leaves to the rain-soaked road, mourning this august twilight, in camouflage for the palm-sized discs of flattened baby snappers. i continue to walk along this patterned trail, focussing my gaze through the gnarly oak limbs, to the heavy purple clouds looming, over the singing pond and the mucked mud banks, where I once watched, during the slow ritual of digging hind legs in the green earthy april rain, the snappers burying their spring treasures.
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Comments: 17
Thank you very much.
I have truly been saddened that with all this rain we are getting, the baby turtles are wondering from their pond, and....
But the leaves are shedding now and truly hiding the little tragedies in a beautiful display.
I am feeling a little overwhelmed.
Thank you so much.
You painted a autumnal pallette of colors with your first words... all leading to the poignant mourning this august twilight ...
I can visualize the palm-sized discs of flattened baby snappers. hiding under the floating leaves.
I liked the alliteration of the singing pond and the mucked mud banks
You deftly brought the life cycle back in play with the slow ritual of digging hind legs in the green earthy april rain, the snappers burying their spring treasures .
This is a beautiful poem masquerading as prose.
Not to mention the waste of turtle soup. ;-)
You have a wonderful beginning magnet line that pulled me in immediately. The content is wonderfully pregnant with descriptive imagery that evokes the mind's eye to partake of every aspect of this wonderful scene you've painted for the reader. Excellently penned!!
Thank you for your unabashed praise.
I'm so glad I found your writing ...I followed Sheila H's story One Night at Daves to the Group writing inspired by art inspired by writing which is owned by You...and then I went to your articles...and here I am.