How about the one where a guy went to a bakery to hire a hit man? You can hear it now, for free, at http://www.gudmagazine.com/vault/1/Item+27 <--clickie and then hit "play". It's just around 5 minutes, but it's a story that'll keep you chuckling all day.
"Item 27" was written by Mike Procter and published in GUD Magazine Issue 1. It was read by Kaoin Fire, with permission of Mike Procter. The music in the background is titled Accralate and is made available by Kevin MacLeod under the Creative Commons Attribution License via incompetech.com.
<hr>So I'm going through my list and I get to Item 27, "Off someone". And I can't really remember even putting that one down, but it's there on the list. And the list is sacred. I can't just start dropping things off because they're inconvenient, or there's no point in having the list in the first place. The list exists to push me to try new things. Step outside of my comfort zone.
I compromise and change it to "Have someone offed", because I'm pretty sure that's what I must have meant. I add some quotes around the word "offed" to show that it's not a real word, and I realize I'm stalling. But how do I start? Putting aside the fact that I don't even have a victim—recipient? target? target—I haven't the faintest idea how to go about finding a person in the "offing" business.
But then, if it was easy, it wouldn't be on the list.
...
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