by donna f.
Member since:
March 6, 2006

I Won't Win Billy Ray's Guitar

July 31, 2007 08:50 AM EDT (Updated: July 31, 2007 09:03 AM EDT)
views: 80 | rating: 9.2/10 (24 votes) | comments: 50

I would love to win Billy Ray's guitar, but I won't.

You see, I am not his biggest fan, Lets be honest here, I'm not much of  a fan at all, and it wouldn't bother me if I never heard "Achy Breaky Heart" again.

No offense, Billy, but after hearing it about a zillion times in its heyday, it kind of grinds on the nerves, ya know?

I don't have a little crippled child who adores "Hannah Montana" , nor do I have a child/sister/uncle/second-cousin-twice-removed with an incurable ailment, who would die happy if they had his guitar.

What I do have is an older sister who is his Number One fan. I don't want it to give to her. I want it to aggravate her with it. "Ha Ha....I got it and you didn't!"

I mean to tease her till the her last breath  with the knowledge that I have a guitar autographed by her idol/fantasy lover/whatever. 

 I should win, because I'm a home town girl. As a matter of fact, when I go home, I travel down the "Billy Ray Cyrus Highway", a chunk of U.S. Route 23, that runs from South Shore Ky,(my home town)  to Ashland, Ky. 

Billy knows how we Kentucky folk treat our families. We love them to death, and would willingly die for them, but we also love to get under their skin, and irritate the daylights out of them, with love.   

Winning this would do that.

 

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Comments: 50

♯ ♪ Jul 31, 2007, 8:54am EDT
I'm glad you're in the same boat I'm in, Donna. I was feeling kind of lonely in here!
donna f. Jul 31, 2007, 8:59am EDT
Joanne,
Yeah, but ya gotta give me an "A" for effort...not much effort, but effort nonetheless!
Kelly S. Jul 31, 2007, 9:08am EDT
amen, sister! the only reason I'd want that guitar would be to irritate my mother-in-law!
El Toro Bravo de Amor Jul 31, 2007, 9:16am EDT
I'd make a lamp out of it. If I screwed it up, no big deal. There's a Billy Ray highway? I'll put that on my list of things to see.
donna f. Jul 31, 2007, 9:20am EDT
Kelly,
SO you know what I mean. Thanks!

Bret,
Yep, its not a long stretch, about 25 miles or so. It runs from just east of the "Carl Perkins Bridge"(no kidding), to Ashland Ky. Billy rasy hails from Flatwoods, close to Ashland.
Sue * Jul 31, 2007, 9:28am EDT
You ought to win based on honesty alone!
donna f. Jul 31, 2007, 9:30am EDT
Sue,
Ah, you guessed my tactic!
Miz Lynn aka/BooBoo Jul 31, 2007, 10:55am EDT
Good ol sibling rivalry is still alive and well..hee, hee, hee ;))
donna f. Jul 31, 2007, 11:04am EDT
Lynn,
Yeah, she just loves to get in digs about how much better she is than the rest of us (she ain't ) and this could even the score a little.
Ishbel R. Jul 31, 2007, 11:09am EDT
Donna F - you DESERVE to win this guitar..

BTW - who IS Billy Cyrus?
donna f. Jul 31, 2007, 11:13am EDT
Ishbel,
Thanks for the vote of confidence. Billy Ray is a guy who had a Mega hit song back in '92 or '93, and a couple other minor hits. He and his daughter, Miley, star on a very popular kids show, "Hannah Montana".
Ishbel R. Jul 31, 2007, 11:14am EDT
OK, thanks. I've never heard of him. Perhaps his fame has not spread to Scotland?!
Ishbel R. Jul 31, 2007, 5:49pm EDT
Yes it has... a friend told me he was a sort of country and western singer? Strangely, that type of music is popular here, but more on our West Coast, Glasgow,Paisley etc, rather than on our East Coast (where I live!)
donna f. Jul 31, 2007, 7:12pm EDT
Ishbel,
Yes, he plays country western music. He also had a TV show called "Doc".
Pat S. Jul 31, 2007, 7:58pm EDT
Nice to know that sibling rivalry spans all ages, and all places! Yeah, I'd do that too, to my sister in Texas!
donna f. Jul 31, 2007, 8:10pm EDT
Pat,
My sister in arms!!!

Spartan,
Nope, just me, and of course I generally steer Bill's Spirit in my direction, although he hasn't visited here yet! Life is too damn short to be deceitful.
Martha C. Jul 31, 2007, 8:10pm EDT
I may never win his guitar but I wouldn't mind hair like his. I have a sis who I'd love to torment alot, except I'm not good enough for her. Lonnie knew her, he was not impressed.
donna f. Jul 31, 2007, 8:12pm EDT
Martha,
DO not let anyone EVER make you believe you are not good enough for them. Sounds like Lonnie was a smart man. He will be missed.
Chris Carlisle Jul 31, 2007, 8:16pm EDT
donna, love it. There is no greater motivator for a younger sibling than to spite the elder!

/youngest of three brothers
//I am so pulling for you!
donna f. Jul 31, 2007, 8:26pm EDT
Thanks Chris! I'm the youngest of 6...I owe so many so much.
Donna, I went to high school and college in Kentucky, and being from Charleston, WVa, I've even been through Ashland a few times, everybody in my family loves to "get under my skin, I grew up playing rockabilly, rock and roll, and blues on the guitar, but I've never ever heard of Billy Ray. Even if I had, his guitar should go to someone who will play it and give it as much love as he did. Are you a guitar player? If you don't get it, then pray it goes to a guitar player. Guitars are meant to be played, not looked at or used to get under the skin of a family member.
donna f. Jul 31, 2007, 9:10pm EDT
Gerald,
My oldest brother plays, and if I won one, I would take lessons. I've always wanted to learn.
Madame Donna C. Jul 31, 2007, 9:35pm EDT
Hah, this made me laugh out loud. There isn't anything big enough that I could have to taunt my sister with in that manner. For that reason, I envy you. You found something to do it with.
La Bellota Jul 31, 2007, 11:05pm EDT
YOu should so win.
April H. Jul 31, 2007, 11:10pm EDT
LOL I love it, but I am sorry I want the guitar to give to my son. My aarticle will be up soon. Heres my 10 for making me smile.
George Corneliussen Aug 1, 2007, 6:30am EDT
Move over Honest Abe, Donna's in town.
donna f. Aug 1, 2007, 8:41am EDT
Thanks all,

April,
I'll read your essay, and give the 10 back.

George,
Nowhere close to Honest Abe..I don't even own a stovepipe hat. I'll wait will menopause is over to comment about the beard..lol
dONNA YOU SOUND LIKE ME. i LOVE TO TEASE MY KIDS AND MY SISTERS AND DON'T FORGET MY BROTHERS AND MY HUSBAND. oH THAT MEANS i TEASE EVRYONE. mY KIDS ARE FROM KENTUCKY AND IM FROM TEXAS AND MISSIOURI WHEN i WAS LITTLE THEN i MOVED TO WYOMING WHEN I WAS 14 BEEN THERE UNTIL 8 YEARS WHEN i MOVED TO THE DAKOTAS. i HOPE YOU WIN THE GUITAR.
donna f. Aug 1, 2007, 11:39am EDT
Sissy,
I have no hope to actually win the guitar. Yes, I would like to have it, but there are far better tales than mine.
yea but at least you are trying donna.
amanda wallin Aug 2, 2007, 6:37pm EDT
Hysterical article! And here I thought you were all southern belles :) NOPE, vindictive and underhanded as can be. Way to go sister!
donna f. Aug 2, 2007, 6:44pm EDT
Amanda,
You'd be vindictive and underhanded too if you grew up the youngest of 6, and the closest was 7 years older ....some of us southern belles have shotguns under those hoop skirts...lol
Colonel Possum Aug 2, 2007, 11:49pm EDT
Donna!

You go gurl! Truth in families laid bare, but truth indeed.

May the Colonel have some fun with the Billy Ray "Kentucky Waterfall" mullet?

By God, it is great to remembered for something and Billy Ray leaves us not only with Achy Breaky but a mullet even Canadian hockey players can admire.

I remember this period very well. I frequented the Keyhole Bar, Eureka, NV, and a gal there named Judy loved that song and Billy Ray to tears. We used to call her Judy, Judy, JUDY! Line dancers step-step-da-flipped over this song.

Judy JUDY was also in love at that time with an ole Nevada cowboy that wore the Big Sky and mountain mornings as comfortably as his dusty Resistol hat.

Judy JUDY loved Billy Ray more...

Cheers,

Colonel Possum
I can't not believe they flagged this article. why would they do that? I just don't get it.
donna f. Aug 3, 2007, 9:50am EDT
Thanks Cindy!

Colonel,
It took every ounce of my conciousness to NOT mention the mullet! Here's hoping ole Jud JUDY, got over that and found her cowboy.
donna f. Aug 3, 2007, 9:52am EDT
FLAGGED!!!! Now how the hell could this little piece of fluff be considered HARRASSMENT!!!!!

Sissy,
I don't get it either.
donna f. Aug 3, 2007, 10:00am EDT
OK, whomever did the flagging, please step forward, you spineless little coward!!!!
go girl I'm so sick of people flagging for stupid stuff. Go get them donna. rip them a new you know what.
donna f. Aug 3, 2007, 11:11am EDT
I have reported it to management...its in their court now.
donna f. Aug 3, 2007, 12:45pm EDT
Yippee...unflagged!..they said it was flagged for a comment in the above thread. I couldn't find anything the least bit "harrassing"..I am flummoxed!

SO....flagger,
Explain yourself, or are you the coward I assume you to be?
Lisa Frost Aug 6, 2007, 1:04pm EDT
As a Kentucky bred girl myself, it is perfectly acceptable to try to get something just to torment a sibling. In fact you would be down right odd if you didn't at least try for that reason!!! LOL. I admire your honesty, and the attempt. Good luck, and from one Kentucky girl to another, Good Luck!
donna f. Aug 6, 2007, 2:22pm EDT
Spartan,
You are so right, my friend, so very right.

Lisa,
Thanks for your kind words...and we're both Ky gals..probably related in one form or another.
Kristen D. Aug 6, 2007, 8:29pm EDT
Donna, you are funny -- and you sound like me, lol!! I'd do the same thing if I had a sibling who was his biggest fan! ;-) And I'm not exactly from KY -- just a bit north in IN! Good Luck anyway! ;-)
donna f. Aug 7, 2007, 9:00am EDT
Kristin,
Thanks, Hon.
Diana Raabe Aug 7, 2007, 12:27pm EDT
Oh my goodness! I feel a bit the same way!

(Hooray for nurses!)
donna f. Aug 8, 2007, 8:59am EDT
Diana,
I am really surprised at how easily we can become "the evil sister"...lol

Thanks for the cheer!!!

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