Do You Keep Score?

Wish I did keep score. Then he would have a broken nose now too.

I don't keeps score per se, but after a while, I usually realize when someone is doing all the taking and I do all the giving. Then I'll usually pull back on my giving until I see at least an attempt at some reciprocation.

When I do things for others it's from the heart. I don't want, or expect something in return.

I think that if you expect something in return you're just going to be disappointed.

I can't say it any better than Lera (above) did ...you'll just be disappointed if you expect something back.

Something to think about.

I think Lera said it really well -- and I try to follow that philosphy in my own life. Try being the key word there :-)

never

Nope, don't keep score. But I will feel it if the balance gets too far out of whack. I like to try to be "ahead", in the sense of feeling I'm doing more than is being done for me. It's the same feeling as having money in the bank.

i think in some small way everyone kinda keeps score,most just dont count on it...when i was young i was plain shallow and yes my thought process was lets just say,not the way it is now...but i grew up and learned from my past,so now i dont expect,i just do

If I have something to share, I will, what is mine God gave me to share, and if somebody needs it, I will. I am not always good at it, or as open as I should be, but I pray each day that God will help me to be as I should. I do as I can, as many have done for me.

I don't. I believe what goes around comes around. What you put out in the world, will come back to you. I've seen it over and over again!

I don't keep score and I don't expect something in return for anything that I choose to do or give. I do, however, expect to be treated w/ kindness and respect as that is how I treat others.

Great article, Sara!

I try really hard not to have expectations from/of people. It just sets us both up for a downfall. I don't keep score either.

Life for me, is not a game to keep score. I do the best that I can for those and with those in my life. Everything seems to balance out in the long run:)

no scores kept

I don't keep score, but I do find myself, when someone does something nice for me, wanting to "even up." Someone once said that that takes away from the other person's generosity.

Absolutely not. I will not give unless it is of my own free will and unconditionally without any expectations of anything in return. That is the true definition of giving.
I have raised 7 children and have never kept a record of anything I have given or loaned them. I do however expect them to be responsible for themselves and their finances. Things happen, sometimes out of our control. If I have it I will give it. If they take advantage of me then I will not be so eager or trusting.
Thank God I have raised responsible children and they respect me and have never taken advantage of my kind, caring heart.

Life is too short. I have a good life...that is all I keep track of..

No to all. If expectations aren't met, discussion follows. If a friend continues to not reciprocate in the friendship, I figure they are more interested in other things, (usually) and go back to my own life and cultivate new relationships.

When I give to my adult children - I do not expect anything in return. They are adults and are always grateful and show it. That is plenty for me. I don't ever loan them money - I give it to them when I can. My reasoning is that they are my progeny and deserve to gain from my gains in life. As to friendships. I have been on the receiving end and the giving end and find that it always evens out but when it doesn't - so what. Life is too short to worry about that sort of thing.

Well said, Joe. I was always taught not to give it unless you can afford to lose it. Sure, it's nice when a friend does something nice for you, but it should be because they want to do something nice for you, not because they feel they owe you. For me that somehow detracts from the event, if in the back of your head you're wondering if they only did it out of obligation. In the act of giving in the first place, I don't want the person to feel as if I am only being generous in the hopes of being repaid. I just like helping people, and every one of my friends know that if they need something that's mine to give, it's theirs. Reciprocation is not expected, and score keeping is a waste of time. There may be a period of time when your friend is much more needy that you are and it will seem as if you're doing all the giving and they the taking, but these things tend to cycle and you may end up in need. I'd much rather continuously give and even be taken advantage of than to pass by the person that really does need help because I am afraid it won't be reciprocated. Life is too short, and if we are not here to help our fellow man, why be here at all?

I dont keep score at all. I do thoe notice when someone is using me and having them in my life is more draining than fun. I had a friend who used me and only called me to complain about crap. It got to the point where I would just stop answering the door or phone when she called or just stopped by. I am no longer friends with this person and I feel so much better.

NO, I dont keep score.What I try to do is treat others as I want to be treated.I give to others and keep giving unless the other person settles into a take and no return.When i start to feel used;I retreat to a neutral ground.If there is no balance in the relationship, I stay in retreat mode.I dont waste time on users.Or manipulators.They are out there.And most times they wont own up to it.And could care less that they have used you or taken advantage of you. i avoid those people at all costs.

heck no!

I wouldn't trade Larry for any amout of money. He is such a blessing. At one time though he kept score as to what he did for Scott and I. We did things for him to but I think he was looking for recognition more than anything.
What hurt was we would ask for something and get the list of all he had done. A friend would need something and he would jump at the chance to help them.
What really bothered Scott and I was his happy willingness to help others in comparison to helping us and the total lack on others part to offer to do anything for him.