Punishment

“Happy 2007!” said Kishore as he warmly shook hands with his friends on a parting note. All of them were in high spirits. Indeed they were expected to be in the highest of spirits, having consumed the best quality spirits in a five-star hotel during the past five hours.

Time was well past three and the large and boisterous crowd in the hotel had already melted away. He and his three friends were the only souls in the dining hall other than the bearers whose body-language made it quite clear that they wanted to go home. The head-bearer had come several times and asked “Anything else, sir?” as a reminder that the new year party was long over.

Kishore knew that he had more liquor surging through his arteries than he could hold. The unsteadiness of his steps, the blurring of his vision and the slithering of his words as he said a warm good bye to his friends showed how liberally he had consumed of the intoxicating drinks.

Having started his car, as he took a turn to get onto the Mount Road, he saw before him a wide and empty grey stretch of tarmac on which to take off like a high-flier. At this early hour of the first day of 2007, the Mount Road looked quite different--- no jostling vehicles trying to elbow their way through a confusion, no noise and smoke and no red lights to halt your speed. The constables, who till an hour ago had stood along the sides exhorting the people to move on and go home, had by now left to take some rest after a hectic day. The wide grey strip of road looked like a rollercoaster where one could let go and surrender oneself to the power of the wheels.

As the car sped along the Mount Road like a nuclear-powered streamer on an open sea, Kishore felt like an astronaut rushing past galaxies. Soon he reached the point on the Mount Road where he was to take a left turn into a lane. He swerved the car with dexterity and while it whirred to negotiate a curve, he entered the bylane with the speed of a car-racer entering the last lap of the race. Just at that moment he found his car proceeding towards a scooterist driving on the left margin of the road with a pillion-rider at the back. He applied brakes but before he could bring the car to a halt his car hit against the scooterists and knocked them down. Kishore looked out to see what had happened and saw an old man standing with an expression of horror on his face and a young boy fallen down with a battered body, blood spattered all over his clothes. This was the first time in life that Kishore had caused an accident. His blood became chill at the sight of what he had done and for a split second he was stunned into inaction. Then, impelled by a sense of fear, he pressed the accelerator and sped off.

By the time Kishore reached home, he was too tired and sleepy to think of anything other than throwing himself on bed. Everyone in the house was fast asleep and the door was opened by the servant.

Next morning he got up around ten O’ clock and tried to shake off the hangover of the previous evening. The vague image of a youngster’s battered face with streamlets of blood flowing here and there like red lines drawn by a wanton boy on a white piece of paper appeared in his mind. There, by his side, stood an old man with horror in his eyes. Kishore tried to recollect what had happened.

“That was not my fault,” he said to himself as he felt uncomfortable about the entire incident. “They should have been careful.”

The fear of a police case and arrest gripped his mind. He jumped at every little noise and continuously apprehended a ring on the door when a police officer would walk in with a handcuff for him. He did not dare to share with anyone his fears about what had happened the previous night.

Minutes passed into hours till it was evening and no police officer arrived with the handcuffs. Gradually, Kishore’s fears began to melt. At that late hour of the night, he said to himself, no one would have seen the accident. Then he recollected that the dark window panes of the car were lifted up. So, no one could have seen him. The old man, in any case, was too stunned to note the number or description of his car.

By the next morning the fear of arrest had given way to a vague feeling of guilt of having injured someone who might take a few days to get well. The injured face, fragmented by streaks of blood, kept haunting him and did not let him rest in peace.  

Three days after the accident, Kishore happened to meet Mr. Juneja, their family lawyer. He asked Mr. Juneja what would normally be the punishment for an accident that results in injuries to the victim.

Mr. Juneja said, “It depends upon how the magistrate views it. It could be a reasonable amount of fine. But why do you ask this?”

Kishore parried the question with a “Just for my general knowledge,” and then started other conversation to forestall suspicions in Mr. Juneja’s mind.

That evening, Kishore went to a temple and dropped ten thousand rupees in the hundial by way of a self-inflicted punishment for the offence committed by him. With that he thought he had atoned for his sin. The burden of guilt on his conscience was largely relieved.

In the bustle of life’s activities the battered face of the injured boy, which in the dim light of the narrow street had looked like a delicate flower crushed and dipped in blood,  now gradually began to dissolve from his consciousness and was soon forgotten.

A few months after the accident, Kishore finished his studies and took up a job in a bank. The requirements of his duties brought him in frequent contact with Surekha and soon the official closeness between them acquired a personal touch. Every time he went to meet her or she went to see him, the few seconds of official conversation began to be followed by several minutes of amorous talk. Chuckles and sly comments from colleagues were initially followed by explanations by the two of them, but soon they realized that it was futile to attempt to hide their relationship and began to openly accept that they were tied in Cupid’s knot.

One day, the entire office staff had to work till late in the evening. A team from the headquarters was scheduled to visit the bank for an inspection. Records had to be brought to perfect shape.

When the work could not be completed by nine O’ clock at night, Kishore said to Surekha, “Shall I get the pleasure of taking you for dinner to some nearby hotel? We can take a bite and then finish the work.”

Surekha said, “Why go out? My house is close by. Let me take you to my house for an impromptu dinner.” Then she winked and said, “That way you can also meet your would-be in-laws.”

As Kishore’s car stopped in front of Surekha’s house, he noticed that it was a middle-class house, but that hardly mattered to him. He knew that Surekha was as high-class in looks, intelligence and conduct as a girl could be.

As Kishore stepped into the house, he dithered and stood stunned and dumb-founded. In a dim corner of the front room there sat the boy whom Kishore had knocked down on the night of the new year’s eve. Even after several months, in the dim light of the room, the face of the boy looked exactly as it had looked then, like a delicate flower brutally crushed by some insensitive beast. Droplets of perspiration appeared on Kishore’s forehead.

Surekha noticed Kishore’s discomfort and explained, “He is my only brother. Some irresponsible drunkard knocked him down on the new year day. He has lost his power to think and understand. Doctors say he’ll pass the rest of his life like an undiscerning vegetable.” 

Kishore looked into her innocent eyes and noticed two pearly drops of tears forming in their corners as she tried to control herself. What would happen if she were to know that the rascal who knocked out her brother’s brains was none other than the man she trusted so much?

As he peeped into her deep eyes, she unknowingly sprinkled salt on the wounds of his conscience and said, “Kishore, I was totally shattered by my brother’s accident. If you had not come into my life and resuscitated my zest for life, I would have become an emotional wreck. You may not know what you have done to me and my family. Only God can judge your contribution to our lives.”

None knew better than Kishore what he had done to Surekha and her family. Surekha’s words of trust and praise, spoken so innocently and in total ignorance of his guilt, wounded him even more.

The accident that he thought was the equivalent of a fine of a few thousand rupees and whose guilt he thought could be washed off with a few notes of currency had ruined a whole world --- the world of the person he now loved most dearly. Something within him wanted to scream and say, “Look, I am worse than a murderer! A murderer kills someone who will then be reborn and start a new life with new ambitions and new hopes. But I have turned the life of a person into a living hell, and with him ruined an entire family!”

The whole evening and for many days to come, Kishore remained depressed and visibly shaken. Surekha thought her brother’s condition had deeply moved his gentle nature and that he was upset that his dear love’s own brother was in such pitiable condition. She tried in several ways to bring him out of his depression, but every time she talked to him, he looked straight into her eyes as if reading something. She believed that the encounter with the victim of an accident had emotionally shaken him up.

She said, “Kishore, why don’t we do one thing --- let us dedicate ourselves to creation of awareness about the hazards of accidents. Let us work to make people aware that every time they knock someone down in their haste to go or their negligence in driving, they are not just committing a crime that can be judged by the laws of the land. They are bringing death and ruin to a whole family. Does the lorry-driver who mows down a cyclist ever realize that the innocent children of his victim may have to terminate their schooling and take up job in a tea-shop to keep their body and soul together? Does the youngster who tries his adventures on his motorcycle on a busy road know that he is jeopardizing the lives of people who have no appreciation for his circus-antics? Kishore, there is much we can do in this area, if we join hands.”

Kishore’s face became like that of a small child who, having committed a sinister sin, stands penitent before God’s gracious presence. He felt that, like a gracious and divine being, she was offering him the opportunity to atone for his sin. He realized that sacrificing his personal comforts and working for prevention of accidents would indeed by the true punishment for his offence. He took Surekha’s hand into his and said, “Will you stand by me? Will you purify me with your divine innocence? Will you cleanse my sins with your unconditional love?”

He put his head on her shoulder and began to sob. She could not understand. She only said to herself, “He has such a soft and gentle heart which is deeply moved by seeing others suffer.”