by sharon SugarMomma is a wise woman,
Member since:
June 21, 2007

I have to go to hell tomorrow - Help!

July 13, 2007 02:46 PM EDT
views: 93 | comments: 42

That's right  - hell!

Tomorrow is the graduation party for my son's girlfriend.  Sweet girl, we love her and want to keep her.

HOWEVER, her father is a born again, bible thumping, fire and brimstone, minister.  This guy is so bad that he can't keep a congregation. 

The kids hate him, but they love their mother.  And the girlfriend wants me to go.

I talked my best friend into driving there with me, it's in Rootstown.  Where the hell is Rootstown anyway, and why would anybody live there.

So, my friend is going with me so that I don't kill him or wreck the car on my way home.

Little does the guy know that his oldest daughter is a lesbian, her roommate is her wife.  His daughter's boyfriend has a lesbian mom, gay brother and lesbian sister.

Should I tell him?  No, I won't, but I know I will so want to.

I'm going for my son and his girlfriend.  It's not about me. It's not about the father.

But they will so owe me for this.

This is worse than walking on hot coals.  Oh well, there isn't much I wouldn't do for my kids.  And I will never let them forget it!!

 

 

 

 

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Comments: 42

Karen Lerner Jul 13, 2007, 2:51pm EDT
Yes - it's all very "Bird Cage", Sharon.

Good luck!
What's your strategy...are you going to ignore him, or answer him back? If the latter, do you want ammo?
sharon SugarMomma is a wise woman, Jul 13, 2007, 2:59pm EDT
I got the ammo alright - but I can't use it. I plan to get in, keep a low profile, get seen by son and girlfriend, get out. Then proceed to neares ice cream stand for the "Ain't I a good girl" Hot Fudge Sundae.
sharon SugarMomma is a wise woman, Jul 13, 2007, 3:01pm EDT
Maybe I will be able to bust into uncontrollable laughter and be unable to speak.
Naw, you can't say anything. But, wow. I might make a few snide remarks directed toward HIM. Should I send you one of my "Jesus Saves...But Would Have Gotten a Better ROI If He'd Only Invested With Wachovia" T-shirts?
sharon SugarMomma is a wise woman, Jul 13, 2007, 3:08pm EDT
Yes please on the t-shirt. I could wear under my blouse. Do you have a huge?
Definitely you deserve a hot fudge sundae!
Dress sexy...maybe he will try to hit on you and then you will have to tell him!
oh wait..I was thinking of those television ministers!
Elizabeth took the words out of my mouth. I think you should get one with mocha almond fudge ice cream and extra whipped cream.

The low profile strategy is the one I'd go with. At my father's memorial gathering I wore, in memory of a particularly nasty email he had sent me, a tee shirt with the words "Bad Baby" on it. Over the tee shirt I wore a white shirt and a suit jacket but I knew it was there.
Stacey "Yeah, I Said It" H. Jul 13, 2007, 3:25pm EDT
You could make a CD with the song, "I Kissed A Girl", on it, then you could ask those who knows the words to sing along....that'll definitely get the party started!

You've got your "wingman" rolling with you and you're only going to support the girlfriend, so just go, be as cordial as you can (but put him on blast if he gets out of line, by now, he knows where you stand!) under the circumstances, have a good meal and get the hell out of there as quickly as you can!
mmmmmm....mocha almond fudge can make you withstand hellfire and brimstone.
Μόףףý ● ķ ~ Jul 13, 2007, 3:29pm EDT
This is why I have been avoiding meeting my BF's mother...from what I hear and what I've seen so far she can't carry on a 1 minute conversation without something about finding Jesus popping out of her mouth. I've managed to stay away for 5 years now...I think I'm doomed this Christmas though. :-(

To heck with ice cream....I'm bringing a flask!
☀ Aunt Shanny Jul 13, 2007, 3:47pm EDT
I know how ya feel. My MIL is coming for a visit next month and she's one of those bible thumpers too.

I'll take that flask, Mog.
Lynn R. Jul 13, 2007, 4:05pm EDT
UGH! Best to just grit your teeth and make the best of a bad situation. Are you driving? Park where you're not blocked in. That way you can make a quick get away if you do decide to kill him. lol Have fun and enjoy your kids' day, that's what it's all about.
Heather C. Jul 13, 2007, 4:08pm EDT
Knowing what you know should give you a cheshire cat smile. Bible thumpers turn me off too. I try to live my beliefs and Jesus said Love one another, not judge other people and use my word as a weapon and hit the others on the head. Personally I would go and be the fly on the patio furniture and watch the farce proceed. If you step back and look at it like a soap opera, which it is when you know the reality the characters don't know, it could be kinda interesting. If you were to leak the secrets it could be devastating, so try not to let them slip. God loves everyone!
Cyndi _. Jul 13, 2007, 4:15pm EDT
He does sound very annoying. Good luck with everything! Yes, I think your son & his girlfriend will owe you big after this! Think of something good. I thinkI'd make them do my laundry in return! LOL! :)
sharon SugarMomma is a wise woman, Jul 13, 2007, 4:37pm EDT
Thank you all for your support - good to know I have friends in HIGH places!
I better try some of this mocha almond fudge...I've never tasted Ice cream that was so good it could get you through something like this!
sharon SugarMomma is a wise woman, Jul 13, 2007, 5:04pm EDT
Sometimes I wish I still drank (although everyone I know is glad I don't).
flit . Jul 13, 2007, 5:04pm EDT
Bible thumpers are the worst.... I think they do more to keep people from religion than anyone else.... they say they are trying to bring them to .... I don't think so

You're a wonderful person to go to support your kid and his g/f - especially if you do manage to bite your tongue through the whole thing - and you most definitely will deserve a sundae or two :) And a medal too, I think :)
Grems 'gremlin' Jul 13, 2007, 5:08pm EDT
I read all of the comments,
!. Needs to be a Jamocha almond fudge sundae with hot fudge, nuts of your choice and whip cream if desired.
2. don't poke the bear. While it may be fun to antagonize this guy, he could be more toxic than you know and don't want to create an issue for your son and his girlfriend.
3 Stay low. nod politely, eat and run like you have never run before. It's not running away, its running towards sanity.
I wish you peace and I will pray for you as you deal with this toxic and annoying man.
sharon SugarMomma is a wise woman, Jul 13, 2007, 5:51pm EDT
I shall run, run towards sanity and sundae.
Jared G. Jul 13, 2007, 5:53pm EDT
Just let your heart lead you. Other people's opinions of us is none of our damn business. Be the mirror that shows the next one's heart. 'Born Again' energy is most often negative; let it pass through you. I hope all the best for you lady!!
Deb J. Jul 13, 2007, 7:27pm EDT
Good luck!
SmileyCentral.com
Gyla F. Jul 13, 2007, 10:40pm EDT
I work with a guy exactly like that. It's likes the more he hates, the happier Jesus is with him. You have my profound sympathy!
*Carol ~Bronx Southern Belle D. Jul 14, 2007, 1:14am EDT
Don't blame Jesus. This guy is A-typical preachy type that does more to drive people away from the Lord, Jesus. Love the sinner: Hate the sin. I don't know this guy, but I know others like him. I have a brother who is a moslem. He is this way. He wants to convert me. I am not as good. I can watch him go to hell in hand cart and think he knew. I am a Christian, but I don't force people to be a Christian. This sounds like an inquisition kind of person. Anyway, your article is featured. Thanks and good luck. Be brave for the kids.
William Dotani Jul 14, 2007, 4:32am EDT
Bring him a Teletubby.
Elsie Duggan Jul 14, 2007, 1:42pm EDT
I think you should just go for your son, try and stay away from the preacher, eat quickly, be nice and go have your Sundae, Make it a good old guilty one with lots and lots of calories and enjoy,enjoy,enjoy. That will take away the stuff you had to put up with earlier, good luck, and best wishes.
sharon SugarMomma is a wise woman, Jul 14, 2007, 1:45pm EDT
Thanks all. I'm getting ready now - have to gear up slowly.

I'm even going to dress conservatively. Boy, does my son owe me lol.
Grems 'gremlin' Jul 14, 2007, 2:33pm EDT
Make sure you dress comfortably even if conservatively, and remember to breathe. sounds silly, but if you take a slow breath every time someone says something you dislike, by breathing, you slow your response. Also is a good way of relaxing.
Then run towards sanity and a nice rich oooey gooey sundae.
Peace
I am guessing you already went to this but I would have arranged to take another woman I could snuggle and kiss.
Missy Cline Jul 14, 2007, 4:35pm EDT
LOL smile sweetly, let his retoric go in 1 ear and out the other and make your son pay for the ice cream later!
Sue D. Jul 14, 2007, 9:49pm EDT
This is just so sad to me. Why should you have to worry about your sexual orientation? Maybe one day it won't matter....
sharon SugarMomma is a wise woman, Jul 16, 2007, 4:35pm EDT
Karen - I published a subsequent essay when I got home. It's Part !!

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