In Britain we have a category of politicians we refer to as Former Future Prime Minister. These are people who have been spoken of by one faction or another as likely Prime Ministers before, usually as a result of some embarrassing incident usually involving a hooker, pole dancer, rent boy or somehow being apprehended by police while wandering the streets trouserless, suddenly dropping off the radar.
I don't know if America, generally more respectful to public figures, has such a concept but if so surelY the dog incident would qualify Republican hopefulÂ Mitt Romney.
Â The story I read alleges that before embarking on a trip to Canada Mr. Romney strapped his Irish Setter's kennel onto the roof of the station wagon. No so bad you might well think, until you learn that the said Irish Setter was still inside. And worse, Mitt knew the dog was there.
Â The car had only travelled a few miles when the dog shat itself copiously, the diarreah (well you'd have the squits if you were stuck in a kennel travelling at fifty miles per hour) running in a brown stream down the rear window. This alerted Mr Romney's son who told Dad something was wrong.
Â The report then said Romney borrowed a hose and hosed down the car before continuing the journey.
Now even though I am not a dog lover this story left me feeling outragred. But also it reminded me of that National Lampoon film where Chevvy Chase ties Grandma in her rocking chairÂ to the roof of the car. But at least Grandma was dead andÂ fictional whichÂ we hope prevented herÂ crapping all over the place.
The question Americans must ask themselves now is if Romney cares so little about an Irish Setter, which are very beatuiful and intelligent dogs, how will he react when forced to deal with the needs of poor and disadvantaged people. Or to put it another way, what if he had been President when Katrina hit New Orleans. Would he have evacuated the city by putting white people inside the buses and trains and the Black and Hispanic folks on the roof.
Â "Now hold tight you guys, there's a hell of a storm coming..."
Is he now a Former Future President or are there enough National Lampoon fans for him to redeem himself with his hilarious John Belushi impressions. Can he do stand up as well as Rodney Dangerfield, does he have the ice - cold psychotic look of Bill Murray in Caddy Shack?
I doubt it somehow.
Anyone care to add any other Former Future Presidents to the list? Hillary Clinton is starting to look a distinct candidate from this side bof the pond. Give your suggestions including Mitt and HillaryÂ with reasons in the comments.Â We could start something here. Who knows, in the run up to the election we might be able to screen a reality show on Former Future Presidents. Now that would be worth watching.
HOW DISRESPECTFUL CAN IAN BE TOWARDS PUBLIC FIGURES? READ WHAT WAS REALLY SAID AT BLAIR'S LAST MEETING WITH THE QUEEN
I don't do groups so if anyone wants vto start a Former Future Presidents Group, feel free - Ian