by Amy Clark
Member since:
December 29, 2006

Poem: Broken

June 25, 2007 05:13 PM UTC
views: 0 | comments: 11
Broken

My no longer mesmerized heart

has stopped,

stifled,

strangled by your golden band,

thrown to the floor,

at the brink of unlife,

drained of identity,

innocence surrendered, virtue lost,

drowned in a puddle of beer.



My eyes have opened,

unknown strength freed me.



Now your hide is shackled,

chained,

wild beast in a stark cage,

abandoned by your lover,

starved for control,

unloved,

unwanted,

undesired.



Alone.



Racine, Ohio
11/29/2006

Comments: 11

Amy Clark Jun 25, 2007, 5:15pm UTC
Ok, so I was supposed to write a "vampire poem" or some other creative response related to vampires for my vampire literature class. I have also been searching for an outlet for recent life events. Here, I have combined the two. This is still a work in progress, I think, but I feel it is getting close.
I know I need more imagery, more "show me don't tell me", but I am not quite sure how to fix it just yet. I thought I would just throw it out there and see what ya'll thought.
Amy Clark Jun 25, 2007, 5:22pm UTC
Thanks

I regained my creativity after I divorced my ex. This is definitely helping.
Michelle C. Jun 25, 2007, 5:33pm UTC
Sounds like domestic violence. I'm hear for you if you need it. God Bless you.. big hugs,

Michelle
Amy Clark Jun 26, 2007, 2:38pm UTC
Michelle...yes, it was, I'm lucky to have had the strength to survive. I'm considering putting up an article about my experience in the near future.
Lauralee Proudfoot Jul 5, 2007, 5:46pm UTC
Wow. Love the poem.

Can't imagine taking a vampire literature class. ICK!

I did one re: Gothic novels - that was more than enough!
Lauralee Proudfoot Jul 5, 2007, 5:46pm UTC
at the brink of unlife

I just love that line.
Amy Clark Jul 5, 2007, 5:54pm UTC
I imposed a lot of restrictions on myself for this poem...I didn't want to say vampire or death or blood...you know, the obvious stuff...so unlife came to me and I really liked the way it sounded...I had a gothic literature class once and it was fantastic! Of course, I like that kind of stuff...LOL
amanda c. Jul 24, 2007, 2:07pm UTC
i loved the poem. im really into that kind of stuff. I used to watch buffy and other vampire movies are t.v shows. and im sorry about what happened with you in your marriage im glad you found yourself again. I think you should put up an article about what happened to you so that way if its happens to any one else they'll know that there not the only one out there that it happened to.
Amy Clark Aug 6, 2007, 4:21pm UTC
Amanda...I think I will...I am lookng for the speech I wrote for my speech class because i like the way I presented the issue in it...when I locate that, I will put up an article.
Terry Collett Aug 6, 2008, 8:18am UTC
Moving, intense poem.
Ali C. Jan 2, 2009, 6:30pm UTC
I think Terry is right, it's very moving. Thanks for posting this.

Join the Conversation
Chime in! Become a Gather member to comment.
Already a member? Sign in
top
 
Gather | Friends | Groups | Share
About Gather | Engagement Marketing | Gather Points | Advertise on Gather | Gather Press | Privacy | Terms of Service | Community Guidelines
Books | Business | Celebs | Entertainment | Family | Food | Giveaways | Health | Money | Moms | News | Politics | Sports | Style | Technology | Travel | Writing
Version 18247, "Zach"; Copyright © 2013 Gather Inc. All rights reserved.