The Man In the Attic: A Short Story.

I keep thinking I must be oversimplifying this illegal immigration issue. But, I have to keep things simple. It makes my life easier. So, here's a story to help me work it out in my mind.

Let's say a man who lives next door to you, sneaks into your house and starts living in the attic without your permission. We'll say he's in the "shadows".

Now, you've discovered he's in there and buddy, you're not happy about it. So, you walk right up to him and ask him to leave. Now, he's all upset. He insists on staying. He doesn't like his house. There are lots of problems there. He'd be happier in your attic. He just wants a better place to live. He doesn't want to cause any problems.

He keeps the attic really clean. He's a quiet guy. He hasn't been causing any problems. Why can't he stay? Well, you're dumbfounded. You know that argument doesn't make sense. But, your wife and kids don't seem to have a problem with it. In fact, they think you're being a bit unreasonable.  You leave for work the next day, but you're expecting him to be gone when you get back home.

Well, shucks. Not only is he not gone, but while you were at work... he's brought over his wife and kids. Now, they're all living in your attic. Now, you're really ticked. They're a nice couple. The kids are well behaved. But, you're still furious to see more of his family now wanting to live in your attic. He doesn't understand why they can't stay. Why would you want to separate him from his wife and children? He doesn't seem to understand that not only do you want them gone, but him as well. You have no intentions of separating him from his loved ones.

You ask him, "Say, buddy. What's wrong with your house?" He replies, "There's no air conditioner, and very little food. Not to mention, the other people who live there don't treat me very nice." We're really nice people, just looking to make a better life.

No one will help you remove the man from your attic. Many of your neighboars sympathize with his predicament. And, now you seem mean and unsympathetic to his problems.

Well, wouldn't you know, they've been in the house with you for a year. His wife has even had another child while living in your attic. Now, your local authorities say, well that's it. You have to let them all stay now.

You're in shock. "What do you mean? This is my house. I ought to have the right to say, who comes in, how long they stay, and when they leave".

The authorities are unsympathetic to your situation. So, they tell you. Look, these are nice people, they're keeping your attic clean. They've been living up there a whole year.  It would be too much trouble to make them move after all this time. We could remove them for a fee. But, it isn't going to be cheap. And, what have they really done that is so wrong. 

Plus, they want you to think about the new baby. He's gotten used to your attic. He isn't familiar with any other place. Your home is the only home he knows.

Well, you're thinking all of this over. But, then the authorities tell you, you're going to have to make some changes, too.

For instance, the people in the attic, are tired of you turning off all the lights at 9PM. They would prefer that the lights go off at 10PM. After all, they're living there, too. They have needs, just like everyone else in the house. And, the attic is getting kind of cramped with their kids. They'd like to spread out a bit, into other parts of the house.

In addition, you've been paying for your children to go to a fairly decent school. They don't think it's right for their kids not to have the same opportunity. The authorities think it would be good, if you did the same thing for their children. That way, everyone in the house becomes educated. It's only fair.

Well, the next day, you're all bummed out over this situation. But, it gets worse. Your boss says, the company has got to make some changes. Their profit margins are shrinking. They're going to have to let you go. You're devastated. Why won't this nightmare end?

You return to work the next day, to clean out your locker, and there's the guy from your attic. Your boss has hired him. As it turns out, he was looking for a job, too. He's really happy. His salary won't be quite as much, and he won't have benefits. But, now, he'll finally have some money to share with his parents who are still living in the house next door.

 So, your boss is happy and the guy from your attic is happy. But, you're finding it a bit tougher to be happy.

 Your boss tries to make you feel better. Look, with the money we're saving from not paying your salary and benefits, we'll be able to sell you widgets much cheaper. In the long run, your boss assures you, this is the right solution for everyone.

You return home, and even your wife and kids attempt to console you. Don't worry. The attic family assures us, that their being here really helps us all in the long run. 

Well, of course, now you're out of work. So, it doesn't come as a surprise, when eventually the foreclosure notices start coming. But, again you're told this isn't a problem. Now, that the man in the attic has a job, he now qualifies for the mortgage on the house.

The good news is, he is willing to allow you to remain in the house.  After all, he was always a really nice guy. The bad news...well let's not think about any more bad news right now.

I know what you're thinking. Vicki, that is the stupidest story you could have come up with.

Hmm, perhaps....