Many don't understand why teens are killing their babies...

Today Oprah Winfrey will be hosting a show on teens killing that are put away for killing their babies. I think she is doing a particular show on one teen. I'm not really sure. Montel previously did a show on some teens that previously killed their child and grandparents of the child being killed were also on the show.

 Many teens in society today have many peer pressures: fitting in with peers, alcohol and drugs in the home, high divorce rates or parents, and other home life problems. Teens only want to fit in, so they go doing things their parents always told them NOT to do, use drugs, have sex (getting pregnant), etc. All the teens want during this phase is reassurance and acceptance.

When ANY teen finds out she is pregnant, she has a lot of overwhelming choices to make.... "Will the child's father want the child? Will he help me? Will my parents turn against me? Will I ever get to do my fun teen activities anymore? Can I love a child so young? How will I financially support this child?," and many other worries that go through any Mother's mind.

As a mother of any age, we have worries, endlessly. It doesn't help when you have to face these worries as a teen. It only makes things more difficult.

I'm 18, almost 19, I knew I'd eventually get pregnant, but when the time came... what happened? I became depressed. I always wanted a child. Don't get me wrong. I always thought in my mind, I'd make a perfect mother, but at times, I feel so depressed, that I want to just kill myself or make the child go away. Do I really want the child to go away? Of course not. All I want is for my emotional pain to go away. I sometimes feel like the clouds are gloomy and no one understands what it's like to be depressed while pregnant. The other night I felt utterly depressed and hopeless, I felt like I'd never make a good mother. I began to think, "should I just make myself have a miscarriage?" I know this sounds VERY sad. Believe me, I'd never do this to my child. I don't want to ever lose my child. Just because I've had these thoughts, doesn't mean I will act upon them. There are many pressures within a teens life: parent's judging and telling the teen s/he should have waited, the time isn't right, etc. I'm not blaming my parents for the thoughts I've had, but I've had many relatives/family and friends already tell me I'm ruining my life, I'll be a bad mommy, never financial be able to raise a kid, etc. It's very sad, that all they have to say is negative things. Where are the positive feedback? They sometimes compliment. Keyword: sometimes. Sometimes isn't enough. We need reassurance constantly we are doing the right thing. I don't believe in abortion, nor do I believe in killing my child at all, but I plan on going to the ob/gyn and hopefully, he will not judge me or want to take away my child for having these thoughts. As a mother, I'm very scared to admit I have these thoughts... I'm embarrassed. I'm afraid I will be judged more than before. I'm hoping the worst won't happen, but I'm also hoping someone will just listen and care about how I'm feeling. It's hard for ANY mother, including teens, but when you are a teen, you have so many more choices to make and at times, it can be very overwhelming. If only people would support teens and listen to them during their pregnancy, they wouldn't feel as depressed and be killing their child/ren. People need to listen and care, not brush the person off because they got pregnant so young. It's sad how many people do not listen to teens when they say, "Guess what? I'm pregnant!" We are just as excited as ANY other mother in this world and we have the right to be congratulated too. Remember, everything happens for a reason, and I think God is giving me this gift as a sign of hope, and I plan on doing the best with my unborn child.

I hope all of you don't judge me for what I've shared, but I wanted you to know how almost all teens feel during pregnancy. It's difficult and we need people to listen and be proud of us, regardless of the choices we make in our lives. Please don't make us feel like this unborn child is a mistake. It will only distort our thinking in the long run and confuse us more...