June 12, 2003- The proposal (Wedding day series part 1)

 This article has been a long time comming and I finally decided I have to sit down and finally write this. I may do this in segments since we didn't have the reception and wedding at once. It may also get lengthy... so I apologize in advance.

I'm a short brown haired blue eyed girl who found her soulmate at the age of 16. I'm crafty, creative, and outspoken and caring. Ken (my soon to be fiance') had that bad boy don't care image...that was intil I got a hold of him. Things quickly changed.  By the time I was 18 I was engaged and already living with him. The proposal was different to say the least. The moment was right and I think that was the most special.

We stopped and talked while he washed his car at a car wash. The night he proposed he was dropping me back off at my mom's house after the car wash. Before we left we sat there for a few minutes talking about random things and listening to the radio. A few years ago I could've told you the exact song that was playing and the line being sung at that moment. Years have past and it's getting harder to remember the fine details of that evening. Out the blue he hesitated to ask me something and kept looking in my eyes. I felt so loved and cared about at that very moment. I've never felt that cared about in my life intil that very second. He stammered with the words. I finally cut in "If your going to ask me..the answer is yes. " Finally after he heard my answer before the question he says "You'll marry me; you really will?" I kissed him to shut him up. It worked too. I never thought my tough guy would be afriad of rejection but he was.

I think him and I both were pretty quiet on the rest of the drive home. It was one of those moments you need to really take in to take an appreciate the beauty of what just happened. I didn't have my ring that day but that didn't matter one bit to me. I was getting married to my love, my soulmate, my best friend.The moment was right so why go through some elaborate proposal and have an awkwardness that may occur if things don't go as planned.

I didnt say anything to my family at the moment. Things were really rough and the family dynamic wasnt the best. I recently moved out of my dad's and stepmom's house because things were more than I could deal with anymore. I really had no place else to go so I went to live with my mom. Unfortunatly she had to move back in with our grand parents a few years before that due to a breakup with a man she was dating and living with.My biological brother was living with them for about 2 years before I came along. Things weren't the easiest in that household either. Especially when your a teenager and have to share a room with your mom. It's even worse when she kept trying to wear my shirts and had a fit everytime one item didn't make it in the laundry basket. There wasso much cauous with everyone arquing with everyone constantly. I was stressed beyond belief. I honestly don't remember how long it took me to finally tell them I'm engaged.

I ended up living with my fiance and his mom and stepdad for awhile and intil we moved out later on.  I wont even tell the story about when I did see my ring and how it was given to me. That I dont care to remember. After we showed and told Ken's mom things went down hill. She wasn't happy and gradually started doing things so we'd break up and I'd leave. Unfortunatly we no longer talk to her because of these things. Our love is strong.

We finish each other's sentences. Do the same thing at the same time. In so many ways we are different but there is also so much we have in common. We just don't discuss politics, religion, and his mother and where usually pretty good. We didn't end up getting married intil May 20, 2006. I had a fear of marriage that I needed to get over before I could move further. I'll continue that in my next section dealing with the actual wedding.....

Part 2 comming soon...