Who Has a Good Marriage?

I'm taking a public opinion poll.

How many married couples do you know personally that have a PRODUCTIVE marriage, where both people contribute to the other, support each other, nurture each other, help each other grow as people?

I don't mean no conflict. EVERY relationship has conflict. I mean overall, how many couples do you know (gay or straight partnerships) that have an effective marriage, where they truly are a team?

Please describe how this plays out. Married couples, please tell me the 5 top things you love about each other that plays into the partnership/team concept. Observers of married couples, please tell me the top 5 things you SEE that makes you think the couple has an effective marriage.

Comments: 9

Karen M. Jun 2, 2007, 12:11am UTC

I have a great marriage, not perfect, but pretty great. I won't speak for others as a lot goes on behind closed doors, so many that seem near perfect may not be. Good question !

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Tracey E. Jun 2, 2007, 12:17am UTC

My husband and I have been together since we were 15 years old. We have been married now for 22 years and still happy.
We don't really fight hardly at all and if we ever disagree to an arguement, it is over in a very short time. We just learned to always support each other no matter what. We always back each other in decisions with the kids, we still find time to be together and enjoy each other.
We treat each other with respect and always love each other.

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Lisa Frost Bailey Jun 2, 2007, 12:18am UTC

I have seen several great marriages. Both sets of my granparents for starters. But the main one is my best friend and her husband. I know they have had their share of problems, but the main thing is that they have always talked things through. They don't pretend to ignore the elephant in the room when somebody is upset anything. There has only been one or two times that I was seriously even concerned and then she would use me or anoother friend as a sounding board, and then approach her husband with a better attitude!

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James s F. Jun 2, 2007, 1:29am UTC

36 years.
Humor. Using each other as sounding boards. Trust.
Assigning off limit topics (like relatives.) Making dates once a month on the calendar.

Speaking of humor, an example is my story "Coffee Monkey."

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Ellen M. Jun 2, 2007, 1:32am UTC

There is so much love and respect between us. We have been married 25 years in July. We listen to each others opinions, have great conversations and are each others best friend. We complete each other, in what one lacks the other has.
We were blessed with a wonderful daughter who is a teenager now. I think we did a pretty good job in bringing her up so far together. My husband tells me how pretty he thinks I am everyday as well as tells me how much he loves me. He is a very good man. We are very blessed to have each other.

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Quinn (aka Entwife) Blackburn Jun 2, 2007, 2:21am UTC

21 years this October.

1.We listen to each other
2. Honesty with self produces honesty with others
3. We try to deal with relationship issues as they arise rather than ignore them
4. We both consider the other a priority in our lives and tend to think of the other before ourselves
5. We both avoid extremes

"even nectar becomes poison in extreme" ~ Hindu proverb

..
U wishing you laughter

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Felix R. Jun 2, 2007, 3:19am UTC

I've always been married...it seems. If I was ever single it most certainly was in another life and body. It started in 69 (the year, not the position) and it's been marvelous. The day she dies...if I'm still alive...I think I'll die also, or...at least most of me. Most of the people I know have had long happy marriages...none of them is in show business, obviously. The key to a long and happy marriage is love and God's ever present grace. We've been together since childhood...we raised each other...I suppose...we've grown accustomed to each other.

I know people that are in a loving relationship, but, there aren't 5 or 10 or 3 things I can pick out as indicators...you just know...intuitively and you also know when it's a marriage of convenience.

Laughter is important and space, but, most of all commitment and respect. Conjugal love is the greatest gift to those that have been graced with it. Our love is so intense...it has often been painful...hard to explain.

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Who Has a Good Marriage?

Comments: 9

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