Off topic: Rules for lunching with the Queen of England

And now i will be too. Keep my hands busy eating fast and keep my eyes to myself.

I think I might pass with those requirements! It sounds like prison dining, except the food's better!

Jennifer, what a delightful piece! I should think HRH Elizabeth II would be honored to shake your hand!

Well, la tea dah for the queen! (sic) Don't dare to even hiccup! God save the queen if ever I were asked to courtesy, or is that courtsey! (spelling) I would have thought about it had it been Diana. But the queen? No way! I don't like her and I never intend to change my mind. I think she was instrumental in the way Charles treated Diana for years, and I'm not one to forgive those who treat people that way! The position of royalty has long outlived it's usefullness in that and in all countries, the government needs to be revised. Whew, thanks for the opportunity allowing me to spout!

Thank you so much Mary Beth! Same to you.

Meanwhile, thank you for weighing in Mike, Stacey and Debi (you can spout all you want; this is, after all, a post on a tea party ... a perfect "spout" play on words). We definitely have an opinionated crew represented so far! ; )

On the first, it would be hard for me not to make eye contact as a photographer want to be I would studying the subject and surroundings for the best photograph shot. The first also impedes upon the second because a hand shake is always preceded by eye contact in the real world. For the third, I would hope that the Queen would eat slow or else I would have to eat fast. Very nice to know but will be filed away and never used probably.

Just having a little fun, Jennifer, that's all, didn't mean to come off as being snippy or anything, some of us are cynical, jaded little satirists! Still don't know if I'd want to have tea with the Queen Mum, I'd commit some etiquitte faux-pas I'm sure!

Interesting to learn that these are specific rules of etiquette to follow with the Queen. I wonderful if President Bush is aware of them...

These are some interesting set of rules... I guess I would try to eat fast, so if the Queen stops eating I'll be ok. But I would have to work on how not to look like a famished guest! How would I ever pull that off? I hope she eats slowly, for her guests' sake!

what an interesting article! I'm going to introduce this custom to the men in my family...after all "Queen Nota" should deserve at least as well as the Queen of England! ;-)

I went to see the movie "The Queen" and some of those rules were covered in that when Tony Blair & his wife go to meet her for the first time.

Well, number one is something I never would have guessed, however, numbers 2 and 3 are longstanding etiquette rules that, in our gauche society where everything goes nowadays, have been long put aside. For instance, a man is not supposed to extend a hand to a lady and a younger woman should never extend a hand to an older one. The person more distinguished, with seniority or anyone considered of higher ilk is supposed to have the option of whether they would like to shake another's hand, so you wait until they extend theirs.

As far as dining, the rule was that you do not start eating until your host or hostess does and finish when they do, or if the meal is in honor of someone, then the rules transfer to the guest of honor instead of the host/hostess.

The luncheon also stipulated "white tie." I've been to "black tie" functions that required formal dresses for women and tuxes for me, but wanted to investigate this whole "white tie" thing a bit further. Here's what I found from ModernEtiquette.com:

"The gentleman wears a long black dinner jacket with tails. A white pique vest is worn over his formal shirt and a white pique bow tie is also worn. Only formal black shoes with a spit shine should be worn with this attire. White gloves are sometimes carried which a gentleman may wear when he dances with a lady. If he is a diplomat, he may wear his pins with the colors of his country on his dinner jacket.

"When the gentleman is wearing White Tie, the lady who accompanies him should always wear a long, very formal evening gown. If she chooses to wear gloves, she may leave them on during the cocktail hour or when she is going through the receiving line. If she happens to be in the receiving line, she may also leave her gloves on when she greets and shakes hands with all of the guests ... At the table, however, she must remove her gloves and place them on her lap during the dinner. She may put her gloves on again if she wishes to participate in the dancing after dinner."

I love all of your comments! Hope this helps our, um, collective knowledge on this subject. ; )

Debi R
As an American, you wouldn't be expected to curtsey to the Queen of the United Kingdom!

I've been at a grand dinner where a member of the Royal family(not the Queen, I hasten to add - noone quite so grand!) was the guest of honour. They eat slllloooowly to allow everyone to finish!

I can do the "shake hands" part.