by Ron Hall
Member since:
August 31, 2005

Have We Forgotten How to Shovel Snow?

April 11, 2007 10:07 AM UTC
views: 0 | comments: 25

 Janie and I live across the street from a large commercial bank, and this morning we observed evidence that an organization can get so large that common sense is lost on it.

This morning we woke to see a skiff of snow on the sidewalks.   Left alone it would have melted entirely by 10.  Of course, I understand this is unacceptable because there are people walking on the sidewalk who might slip.  So, okay.  Go grab a shovel and . . .

 fileId:3096224744083630;size:full;

 What?

What's this?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I could clear this sidewalk in 5 minutes.  This is no macho bragging, as I am sadly out of shape.  There's nothing there.  You touch it and it melts.  What you do is go over to the building, set down the shovel and push it all the way out to the street, empty it, walk back to the building and repeat.

Five minutes, tops.

As we sat and had our morning coffee, we watched this guy push a motorized whirling-brush thing for an hour. 

We got up to take a shower, and I came back just to take a peek and see if he was done yet.  Apparently so, because I didn't see the red thing any more.

Oh. Please.

fileId:3096224744083631;size:full;

( . . . . . . . . . . . )

 

Wha . . . . ?

 

( . . . . . . . . . . . .  )

 

 

 

 

 

 

You will notice all of the snow has been pushed into the street.

That's right. There was no snow.

This is like using a backhoe to plant flowers.

This is like driving yourself to work in a dump truck.

This is like trying to hit one person in a crowd with a 500-pound bomb.

This is like sending Christmas presents overnight by FedEx.

(Oh, wait.  I do that last one.)

Comments: 25

Leah Christensen Apr 11, 2007, 10:09am UTC
LOL Unbelieveable, isn't it?!
Michelle W. Apr 11, 2007, 10:41am UTC
I have seen this time and time again. Everyone compains about this global warming and how high gas prices are, but do they really do anything about it? NO!!! Instead, they would rather make things much worse for us all.
Nana to Seven Cutiepies Apr 11, 2007, 11:29am UTC
My first morning chuckle! Don't let them know you can do it in five minutes though. To save money they just might ask you to come over next time.
Ina ♥ ♥ Apr 11, 2007, 11:32am UTC
It's like treating a migraine with a baby aspirin. No, wait. That's backwards.

It's like wearing white to your third wedding. No, that doesn't work, either.

It's like running your chihuahua through a carwash to get a bath. Well, that's dumb, but it works.

Thanks for the writing exercise. (And great article, btw.)
Bert B. Apr 11, 2007, 11:47am UTC
Growing up in Michigan, I learned to shovel snow. In fact, as a kid I earned a few extra quarters cleaning off my neighbor's sidewalks and steps. But I have lived in southern CA for almost fifty years, so I probably have forgotten everything I ever knew about snow-shoveling technique.
I think it would come back quickly, though if I gave it a chance.
Which I have no intention of doing.
Ron Hall Apr 11, 2007, 12:30pm UTC
Thanks all. Where I grew up, you were wise to walk around the sidewalk for a day and let the two feet settle and solidify. Then you smear a coal scoop with crisco (so snow won't freeze to it), and you chop out 20-lb blocks that you then toss aside in the time it would take to shovel 8 scoops of powdery snow. I've shoveled half way down an alley, wide enough for cars to drive though, in 6 hours. You just need to know how to do it, and it does *not* require equipment.

Sara, Leah, yes we were laughing too.

Nana, when it really snows, I grab a shovel and scoop out the curb cuts for the people in wheelchairs. The city doesn't understand the importance of that, and shoveling slush is really good exercise.

Ina, those were some good "It's likes". They're fun to come up with aren't they?

Bert, I haven't lived in snow country for 15 years now. Oh, we have "snow emergencies", when it snows 2 or 4 inches, but for the most part it does not snow in Minneapolis or St Paul. Not really. Northern Minnesota gets hammered I understand, and the wind piles up 15-foot drifts, but I don't go there in the winter.
Cecile V. Apr 11, 2007, 12:33pm UTC
Who needs a shovel? In the Eastern Sierra ski resort town of Mammoth they have heated sidewalks that take care of that! I've never been up there in the winter to see how it all works, but I saw them putting the system in during the summer when I was up there a couple of years ago.
Cynthia J. Apr 11, 2007, 1:01pm UTC
Thanks, Ron. I'm still laughing! I know, it's not REALLY funny. Shoveling is not only more efficient in this case, it exercises the body, burns calories.
☃ Shannon K. Wendt Apr 11, 2007, 1:02pm UTC
Funny!
© MrBill .. Apr 11, 2007, 1:02pm UTC
Cecile, you didn't mention the truly unique method of heating those sidewalks in Mammoth - geo-thermal !!! from the local hot springs.

Ron, in my neck of the woods we are practiced at the art of the snow shovel ...

SnowDoor Must be some way out of here… ...must be some way out of here…
Bert B. Apr 11, 2007, 1:21pm UTC
We were in Reykjavik, Iceland a couple years ago. The sidewalks in the city have a strip down the center where a geothermally-heated water pipe runs. Keeps the sidewalk clear in the winter. All you need is a nearby volcano and you can have this in your town too.
Cecile V. Apr 11, 2007, 1:38pm UTC
Mr. Bill, you are right about the geothermal. Thanks for mentioning it.
Ron Hall Apr 11, 2007, 3:18pm UTC
My home town also has geothermal resources that could be used for all sorts of purposes. The town could not move forward with it because of potential harm to some private water rights on hot springs. Ack.

Cynthia, shoveling is indeed great exercise.

Thank you Shannon.

Mr Bill, yes. That's snow. Oh, man. Where's my coal scoop?

Bert, I'll pass on the nearby volcano. Iceland really has a love/hate situation going on with their geological asset/liability balance.
Jennifer G. Apr 11, 2007, 4:41pm UTC
It takes all kinds I guess. It does seem a little like overkill to me. Maybe he just wasn't getting paid enough to make the effort and he wanted to drag it out so he could make more money?
Ron Hall Apr 11, 2007, 4:56pm UTC
Jennifer, either of those seem plausible to me. I've also wondered if the maintenance worker's union has negotiated for the use of "labor saving machinery" whenever possible, resulting in a situation where the person has to take two hours to do something he could do manually in no time at all.
Rob Appell Apr 11, 2007, 5:09pm UTC
I don't even shovel when it snows...no matter what the accumulation is. I didn't put it there, so whoever did can take it away. Of course, I'm a renter with my home sitting right ON the main front sidewalk. Snow removal was not included in my lease, so I see it as the landlord's responsibility...or the village, who actually owns the sidewalk. Their plows are the ones that push the road snow up onto the walkway sometimes 2-3 feet deep. As for pedestrians, they can walk through it...or walk on the other side of the streets where those residents shovel the walk.
Ron Hall Apr 11, 2007, 5:56pm UTC
Actually Rob, you're right. He who put it there usually removes it, in due course. Unless you live on a glacier, and I'm pretty sure that's not the case.
Jennifer G. Apr 11, 2007, 5:56pm UTC
Seems like a big waste of time to me taking 2 hours for a 10 minute job. Wonder who gets to decide this stuff? Seems like there are more productive ways to spend your time.
Tyler W. Apr 11, 2007, 6:35pm UTC
This is the land of drive thru fast food, as if "fast food" wasn't fast enough. Why not sit in a line of running cars to get it instead of walking ten feet and getting out of the car.

Or if you are in Florida you can have a drive by viewing of a casket at your local funeral home. Yes, that is true!
Ron Hall Apr 11, 2007, 8:48pm UTC
There just seems to be an idea that if you involve an internal combustion engine, then that will make it easier, Jennifer. I would feel profoundly stupid operating either of those machines. My apologies in advance if anyone here owns one, of course, but I didn't post this to Conservative Club to avoid that very situation.

Tyler, the guy in the red machine, does have to push it around, so he's getting a walk in. It's just highly goofy looking.
Tyler W. Apr 12, 2007, 3:01pm UTC
It looks like a tractor!
Ron Hall Apr 12, 2007, 3:24pm UTC
It's like one of those riding lawn mowers, but a little bigger, with a cab and - I assume - a heater.
Wendy F. Apr 13, 2007, 1:03am UTC
That is a hoot ! When I read your title , i was thinking no we have not forgotten , but so many of us have gotten older and don't want to get a heart attack !! :-)
Ron Hall Apr 13, 2007, 8:53am UTC
Wendy, I can think of no better way for these maintenance guys to get a heart attack than having machines do everything for them. I see them walking around and they are far from elderly (so far). I think they may hasten their aging by hiding from work and cold. I feel the same about germs. Eat mud; that's what I say.

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