by Frightening Icon, Official Varmint of The State of Franklin

Member since:
August 10, 2006

G N-N Breaking News: Uranus Rules The Internet

March 02, 2007 12:13 AM EST (Updated: May 30, 2007 09:55 PM EDT)

views: 37 | rating: 8.1/10 (9 votes) | comments: 16

This Gather Non News Correspondent was shocked to find out today that, according to astrologists, both television and computers are controlled by Uranus. Chat room assholes could not be reached for comment.

In weather news, high winds are expected later tonight.

Tags: chat rooms, television programming decisions, gaseous anomalies, bathroom humor, computers, astrology, gather non news corps, puns, no life, non news, computer, humor, uranus, butt jokes, pests, teh intertubes, message boards, do not feed the trolls, nonsense, trolls, satire, astrological, he who dealt it smelt it, technology, annoyances, television, g n-n, silent but deadly, social outcasts, funny

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Comments: 16

charles thiesen - gather's only god, proud to be from gay-supporting Massachusetts Mar 2, 2007, 12:15am EST

Mine? What a responsibility.

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Melissa The Pirate Princess is still alive! Mar 2, 2007, 12:27am EST

I really don't want to meet uranus.

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Aniko Mar 2, 2007, 12:46am EST

It also rules Tony Blair, according to that site.

But there's even more bad news: Its nature is innovative, explosive, and unexpected...

Chamomile tea might help, perhaps.

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Nanci B Mar 2, 2007, 12:49am EST

Uranus is in constant contact with Mianus (Connecticut).

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Frightening Icon, Official Varmint of The State of Franklin Mar 2, 2007, 7:11am EST

I'm reading the comments right now. Neener.

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♯ ♪ Mar 2, 2007, 8:31am EST

If uranus rules the world and TV, what does your boobs rule?

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♯ ♪ Mar 2, 2007, 8:32am EST

Wait a minute, if uranus rules the world, what does Mars (Capaletti) rule?

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Jody Says Mar 2, 2007, 9:25am EST

Uranus has a ring around it, me thinks its caused by assteroids.

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Dannielle S. Mar 2, 2007, 9:43am EST

Pity the poor Scorpios: we were ruled by the planet Pluto, now demoted. Alas!

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♯ ♪ Mar 2, 2007, 10:01am EST

I guess it's anarchy for you, Dannielle! You are ruler-less.

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Dannielle S. Mar 2, 2007, 10:15am EST

Actually, I have two rulers, and they feature inches, centimeters, and millimeters! I simply lack Cosmic influence, but I became both a Pastafarian and a Charlesian and that helped.

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Frightening Icon, Official Varmint of The State of Franklin Mar 2, 2007, 10:45am EST

I'm Pagnostic, myself, and like all Discordians, I'm ruled by Eris.

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Kris M. Mar 2, 2007, 1:48pm EST

To shamelessly steal from MST3K, shouldn't someone travel to uranus to wipe out the klingons?

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Frightening Icon, Official Varmint of The State of Franklin May 30, 2007, 9:52pm EDT

But who does Uranus moon, John?

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