by Erica Hidvegi

Member since:
September 7, 2006

Exit Now is Not Permitted

February 16, 2007 09:33 PM EST

views: 66 | rating: 10/10 (14 votes) | comments: 36

The pain, came and went, in the middle of the back

when he rose from bed each morning. "Good morning sunshine"

would softly fall from his lips while thoughts of dropping away,

perched on a cliff of personal stride to beat what wants to take him,

gnaws at his energy.

Few weeks and the pain still, came and went. No change. No mention.

His smile, smart-allecky way, to break up the monotony, nearly void.

A CT scan, bad news and a break for the parking lot. Tension, anger.

A peacemaker, he says. A gentle instigator, Lord knows. A great man,

I'm told. The perfect husband, wife agrees. The better father, children

aim to please. We hold you precious. We hold you dear. Your contract

is not expired so don't you think of exiting outta here !

Not permitted.

Tags: living, ct scan, great, family, stride, exit, pain, life, love, anger, father, energy, people, health

To Groups: Sharing Circle, What's on your Mind, Pains and Gains, An Open Journal, Just Write!, Poets and Writers, First Write It, Then Post It, Gatherism, Things that make you go hmmm..., The Melting Pot Short Form Writing Group

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Comments: 36

Martha Jette, Author/Editor Feb 17, 2007, 9:50am EST

Well put, Erica. Stay strong and hang in there during this trying time. My thoughts and prayers are with you and Ron.

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John S. (arizona) Feb 17, 2007, 10:06am EST

I'm so sorry you Dad is not well. I'll add a prayer for him, and a speedy recovery. You're words say a lot. I wish you all the best as well, and wish I could do more for you. Take it as easy as you can in these troubled times. God bless.

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Paul L. Feb 17, 2007, 10:07am EST

Touching, commanding, thoughful. This comes right from the heart. Shall be keeping you in my prayers.

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John S. (arizona) Feb 17, 2007, 10:07am EST

I wish we could edit.....s/b "Your"..... sheesh.

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M. Bradley McCauley McCauley Feb 17, 2007, 10:20am EST

Sincere and heartfelt prayers. This week I had the pain, called 911, went to the hospital, then to another hospital, another heart stent implanted. Feel good as new and am thankful for my healing. I pray and visualize healing for your dad and ask the best be done for all.
Blessings and love to you and all your family

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Linda R. Feb 17, 2007, 10:28am EST

I'm sorry that your dad is so ill, Erica. You and your family are in my thoughts.

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Ron Hall Feb 17, 2007, 10:50am EST

Your love is no small gift Erica. He is an afflicted man, and a lucky man to have you.

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Carla G. Feb 17, 2007, 11:06am EST

I can tell from your poem that you have a very special relationship with this man. My prayers are with you and your family.

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Dawne Joy Feb 17, 2007, 11:09am EST

An excellent and very telling poem. My thoughts and prayers are with you as well.

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Susan *. Feb 17, 2007, 11:14am EST

very nicely put Erica.....my father had a quadruple bypass almost 5 years ago so I know how frightening this may seem to you....have faith in the doctors and especially in the nurses....they see all and know the best. I'll be saying a prayer for you and your dad....remember two words "faith" and "love"...both will conquer all fear! God Bless!

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Vinay Benjamin Feb 17, 2007, 11:23am EST

Erica - this article went straight to my heart. Have courage and hang in there. My prayers are with you in your time of trial.

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Max Babi Feb 17, 2007, 11:30am EST

Indeed, poignant and piercing words, Erica.
Tell your dad my prayers are with him all the time, may God give him relief and a healthy future...

Cheerz!

Max

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Dawn M Feb 17, 2007, 12:24pm EST

Nicely written Erica. Thoughts and prayers go out to you and to your father.

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Ricky Fico Feb 17, 2007, 12:31pm EST

A great tribute and I hope for an extension on your father's life and a return to good health.

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Marinela Kotsina Feb 17, 2007, 1:02pm EST

Prayers, healing energy on the way.
love and light

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Tailgunner Tiedemann Feb 17, 2007, 1:32pm EST

Hang in there, prayers in place.

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Marsha F. Feb 17, 2007, 1:50pm EST

Well written expression of your love for your father, and your concern for what he is going through. Prayer has been sent on his behalf.

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**AngelEyez** a. Feb 17, 2007, 2:47pm EST

My Prayers go out to you..Keep your head high and sprites too!

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Leanarda S. Feb 17, 2007, 10:42pm EST

Erica I hope your Dad comes threw this ok, from your tribute he sounds like a wonderful father.

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Marilyn is looking for whatever there is. N. Feb 18, 2007, 11:26am EST

My prayers are with you, your Dad and your family. What a wonderful tribute you just wrote.

Gentle Hugs,
Marilyn

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Erica Hidvegi Feb 18, 2007, 1:24pm EST

Thank you very much for ALL of my gatherers blessings of longevity, better health, prayers, healing and speedy recovery. He is now at home, since midnight last night, and under observation by the entire family. Some new lifestyle changes are to be implemented, his diet watched, his activities not so much detrred but lessened in excitability. He did scare us, especially me as we have forged an incredible freidnship and relationship as father and daughter and like I said, "Your contract is not expired so don't you think of exiting outta here ! ", is the focal point for now. He and I and my entire family want to thank Gatherites for being truly united in compassion, empathy and sincerity !

gentle hugs to all of you who ventured onto the page and left beautiful footprints !

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Erica Hidvegi Feb 18, 2007, 5:15pm EST

Martha, I discovered my reserve-tank with a little strength left in it to make this event NOT the directors last cut. This performance stands by itself though, we hope for no repeats !

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Erica Hidvegi Feb 18, 2007, 5:34pm EST

I took things as easy as I could John but decided I needed to stay much stronger and stand much more alert than mom who really needed the mental emotional and psychological retreat from worrying about her husband so much. When she read this it was as if a weight had been lifted and I knew I had done my part so perfectly.

I now will keep observing and helping along the way but stubborn is as stubborn does and dad can be a little more stubborn than the average patient . . . although first day back we still just want to curl up in bean bag chairs sipping cocoa and laughing having him back with us.

Thank you for your heart-felt and delivered prayers.

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Dawn M Feb 18, 2007, 6:28pm EST

Glad to hear your father is home and doing better. I know I also have a close relationship with my father and spend a lot of time with him. It's so difficult when you see them getting ill and can't do much to help them.
God Bless you and your family.

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johnson ogbonnaya Feb 19, 2007, 2:58pm EST

"If the spirit of him that raised Jesus christ from the dead lives in you, that same spirit shall vitalize your mortal body."-Bible
"With man it is impossible, but not with God, for with God all things are possible"-Mark 10:27
"Believe in the Lord Jesus christ and thou shall be saved, thou and thy household"-Acts of the apostles.
Believe in the power that is in the name of Jesus and pray. All will be well.
You may seem to be trying to change a situation which God is equally just using to change you. Think about

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jessie voigts Feb 19, 2007, 8:01pm EST

that last line is beautiful. what a great poem - and a terrible situation, you'll be in my thoughts.

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Susan *. Feb 19, 2007, 8:56pm EST

Erica....there is truly something special between a father and his daughter. I know when my father was so ill after his bypass I told him in no uncertain terms to "FIGHT!" he heard me and he did.... he also told me he knew I was praying for him and that he wasn't alone. I think you will find later when you talk to your Dad that he will say much of the same thing.... they KNOW when angels are there...they may not be able to label them as angels but they know none the less that they are not alone! God Bless!

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Ian M. Feb 19, 2007, 9:31pm EST

I feel preachy saying I want you to be well, but I do want that. Take good care as you have done so this whole way to be at your age, and I want you to never give up.

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Jared G. Feb 22, 2007, 12:13pm EST

Dear Erica,

The heart is all that matters. From mine, I wish you and your father strength, hope and wisdom.

All the best,

Nam-myoho-renge-kyo,

jared

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Erica Hidvegi Feb 22, 2007, 8:02pm EST

Paul my dad heard your prayers and so did Goddess as she took the stubborn nature out of him and he will continue with treatment and more tests.

Thank you again

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Erica Hidvegi Feb 22, 2007, 8:04pm EST

M Bradley M., thank you for your blessings and love as these well wishes echoed through the cloudy recesses of his mind and made him feel better.
I appreciate you !
gentle hugs,

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Erica Hidvegi Feb 22, 2007, 8:05pm EST

Linda he is recovering from the news slowly and will take the necessary precautions and our family thanks you for keeping us in your thoughts.
sharing the light

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Elsie Duggan Feb 26, 2007, 11:15pm EST

Dear Erica, In my heart I know how you are feeling. To have a parent ill is a fearsome thing indeed. You must try and keep a positive attitude and transfer it to him. I don't know if when you were describing your father's words as saying peacemaker, if you meant pacemaker. If so, know that I have one and have had one since 2002. It saved my life and I didn't know I was in any trouble just kept fainting. The third time my heart didn't start right up again and was given emergency surgery which took about fortyfive minutes but keeps this old heart beating. I pray for your father. My children have just lost theirs and they are all a bit angry at him for leaving as am I. I think this is a natural feeling. Beautifully written piece. Very thoughtful and loving daughter. My prayers to your mother too.

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Erica Hidvegi Mar 5, 2007, 12:36pm EST

To all that have sent their blessings for my dad... Thank you ! He is harnessing the positive help coming through in the collective wave and making progress with the doctors, tests and the way his body reacting to trauma seven years ago induced by surgical intervention and the placement of a stent. Asbestos? Mold? Houses we have lived in and jobs he has had may be the underlying cause of his current issues but he is strong and nothing will allow him to 'exit outta here' before his time ! He ain't done, is what goddess tells me, and I believe her !

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Felicia R. Jan 9, 2008, 9:32am EST

First thing:

I would like to say sorry for taking a while to get to your article. I have been away from gather for a while and I am finally getting to the 3000 plus emails I have awaiting me on here to go through. so I am starting from the most recent received to the first I ever received.... So now I am finally able to read your piece. Thank you for sending me the link to this article.

Now second thing:

I know I am massively late, but I still wanted to say I hope everything is going well, and hope he is doing okay. I know it was a while ago this article was created and not sure if any updates were ever made, but if he is still around I am hoping the best for him. And sadly if he isn't I hope everyone is doing okay and coping well. Hopefully he went peacefully. My prayers are still with your family.

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