So I was conceptualizing my choice of clothing last night.....lately I have really been paying attention to this. You see, I am one of two females at my job, which is cool and it has its perks....but ladies let me tells ya.....you can forget your inner goddess sometimes. You can work with the guys....but don't start looking like one of the guys.....especially if they are programmers. It can get ugly.
But dressing too nice can get ugly too so I have to get inventive sometimes. I try to stay conservative without looking like I could run a reform school with one fist.
Today's choice of wardrobe was a brown dress and Madras pearls (which reminds me, I have an article about these pearls) Sounds very 'Mary Atherton" right? (If there are any Mary Athertons out there I apologize....it is my code name for pilgrim. When I lived in NH with my daughters and our hispanic surname....my daughter wanted a pilgrim name.....so Mary Atherton was our "pretend" name.....did I mention that her name is Madelyn? hee) Back to the subject.....so I wanted a hint of something to remind me I am not taking a cruise on the Mayflower in the afternoon.
I bought some brown fishnet stockings (because even my shoes were conservative). Wow. I had no idea I was bringin' sexyback. And I know it has to be the stockings because I am so not that cute. I went to pump gas.....(I swear -- I get more indecent proposals at the gas pump lately...which I don't get. Mom, Dad this is "Jimbo", we met at the gas pump....no, this is a conversation I will not be having) and this guy is trying to strike up conversation.
Keep in mind this is a morning where I am actually sure hell hath frozen over because it is so cold.....but irregardless....he shall get no play....or conversation, besides my lips are frozen shut.....which might really make some folks quite happy.
Besides....this is pre-coffee times and I noticed he is not talking to me....he is talking to my legs. (Note to self: Fishnets and a hellaciously cold day.....what was I thinking....thankfully nylons are under the nets) My gas pump suitor must have sensed that my caffiene levels were low. He paid for my coffee.....and I mumbled a confused thank you and despite his thoughtfullness. I felt that hell hath a little more freezing to do before I would give this man my real name. For the occasion, I used "Ethel....Ethel MacGuillicutty".
On to the job.... where I found further proof that it was more my stocking than me as evidenced by my fellow road warriors. Someone changed the rules of the road here recently. Using a turn signal means, 'I would like to change lanes' to the driver and "hurry, gotta close the gap" to the 5 cars in the right lane. Yellow means light green. And you know you are in trouble if they have a Nascar sticker on their hooptee...illusions of grandeur I think they call it. Anyway......nobody was more or less kind on the road.....probably because they couldn't see the power stockings.
I pull in to the parking lot and my work partner is waiting for me, but that is usual. What is not usual is usually I am hurrying up to keep up with him.....because he holds doors and I carry too much crap (books, uniforms, etc)....today he was hurrying to keep up with me. And he told me my dress was pretty.....which is weird....because I had a coat on. Hmmm. It has to be the stockings. We were in the elevator with the other wage slaves....usually the corporate trixies who ride the elevator are too arrogant to return my hello. Today.....either the hell that froze over or the nets had them asking how I was doing. oooOOOoooo.
So it is 10 o'clock and people are actually trying to interact with me. Men and woman alike. It is good to break out of programmer girl chic. It has got to be the nets!!!
What is it about the nets? I have to know! Unless hell truly did freeze over and I am like an angel from hell harkening all other creatures to emerge/crawl from under the rocks from which we came.......trapping them with my lethal fish net hosiery. That answer makes much more sense and is kinda cool in a hellacious kind of way. (and Yes I actually do own a pocket protector......but I am not wearing it today...hmmm)