Dear Friends and Enemies, the Apathetic, and to The People I Do Not Know Yet (especially if you are non-Gather Members):
I'm sad to report that lately my Cranky Level has been notched up a few bars, and for this I must apologize. I have to blame my poor disposition on the recent wave of Seasonable Weather. Since it is so flipping cold outside, like it's supposed to be, I've not been able to take my occasional constitutional (walk) to my office in glorious downtown Royal Oak. Instead, I've slid into work in my hybrid, shivering the entire way. A tip-a five minute drive won't warm up a Prius. It's also too cold to rummage around in my yard for what remains of my brussels sprouts, damn it. Down gear, sheepskin boots and leather gloves won't cut it. Sorry.
My annoyance is topped off by the fact that I suffered five weeks of steady rain, then bought a glorious yellow and orange Marimekko umbrella, and now it's too cold to even use it! I only hope I can find said umbrella when I need it for the deluge in April.
I deeply apologize to those many non-Gather members who make their living (if you can call it that) as telemarketers, who have chosen today as a good time to call me and get the phone slammed on their ears. I know it probably hurt you, but it was extremely satisfying for me.
My next heartfelt apology goes to all the non-Gather members who are authors. I no longer have any time to read your books, as tempting as the covers and the New York Times best seller list makes them. I am too busy reading material on Gather, and following the Gather Goons and their antics. It's just too much guilty fun!
If anyone has some spare chill pills to share, please let me know. Until then, I've very sorry.
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Member since:
August 11, 2006 Today's Apology to Non-Gather Members
January 11, 2007 11:48 AM EST
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comments: 48
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Comments: 48
(I think that's what people keep calling me)
Lori, I'm sorry, but you must keep your cold rain. I apologize for wishing I had some.
I'm not sorry for Clay, and you leave my umbrella out of this! Or I'll poke you with it.
Just call her Joan of Snark...
i am sorry that I didn't write this, because I was going to. For that, I apologize. And now, I apologize for not keeping up with everything. Time for bed.
I apologize to those right-footers that I may have offended.
Just kidding...
OK, Debra, I'll share "cranky" with you, and believe me, I'll do the term and you proud!
HAVE YOU ANY GREY POUPON?