"The one serious conviction that a man should have is that nothing is to be taken too seriously."
- Nicholas Butler, American educator (1862–1947)
Nothing about our lives that could change at a moment's notice should be taken too seriously.
Your job could disappear unexpectedly. Your car could be totalled in an accident or a fire could make it worthless within minutes. The life of a loved one could be snuffed out in the time it takes to receive a phone call.
The death of a loved one shouldn't be taken seriously? Or, worse, the loved one shouldn't be taken seriously? An explanation of not taking something too seriously is in order so that we can make sense of this quote.
The quote says "too seriously." That should mean "life-ending" or "life-destroying."
We have all heard of people who say that they couldn't live without their lover. Most, though it would be last on their list of possibilities, could indeed survive and make a new life. It happens to many people. Some can't cope with their loss and demonstrate this by suicide or depression that compromises their immune system to the extent that they die of some disease within months or a few years. That's too seriously.
Life, by its nature, must carry on. Survival is our most basic instinct. We, as components of the life on this planet, must be prepared to carry on and build a new life when a loved one dies.
Is that absolutely necessary? Would the world be lessened by the loss of one more life?
That's not necessarily a moral question. It could be a practical question. If you and many others were aware that someone you know wanted to commit suicide, how many people do you believe would advocate leaving that person alone to end his life? The answer would be unanimous or close to it, some intervention would be essential.
As awkward and unpleasant as it may sound, each of us would do well to think about the possibility that a sudden tragedy could alter our lives. If our life had to be changed due to one of those unpredictable events or sets of circumstances, we should at least have some idea about how we would cope with it. Coping is how we get through tragedies.
If we don't have a plan, tragedy could wreak more havoc with our life than is necessary, maybe even ending it or bringing more tragedy to our loved ones who would survive the tragedy.
They don't deserve that. You don't deserve that.
Bill Allin
Turning It Around: Causes and Cures for Today's Epidemic Social Problems, striving to help everyone be prepared for the eventualities of life.
Learn more at http://billallin.com
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Comments: 28
There will forever be a hole in your life. But you can build around it.
We all develop holes of some sort as we get older.
Thanks for your comment.
not your fault, the fault of the author of the quote, a purist would argue how can you take anything too seriously, it is either serious or it is not.
I do now why you followed the logic you did, but I still on the same issues you bring up feel that there are things that are serious no qualifier or adjective needed.
Death is serious, thoughts of suicide are serious
of course we approach these life issues and others with a certain degree of seriousness which is what you are referring to here.
We should have a plan to cope with any situation that could alter our lives through tragedy.
Topics may be deemed serious or not.
Oh, so you mean that that occlusion of your cardiac arteries, which would stop your heart instantaneously, shouldn't be taken all that seriously? Okay, Bill, whatever you say.
We should have a plan to cope with any situation that could alter our lives through tragedy.
Topics may be deemed serious or not."
And Mr. Bill's bizarre pronouncements may be deemed sane--or not. Wow! Do you think you could get any more incoherent than this, Bill? Have you been overindulging in that BC bud again?
Oh, yes, NOW I see.
I do now why you followed the logic you did, but I still on the same issues you bring up feel that there are things that are serious no qualifier or adjective needed.
Death is serious, thoughts of suicide are serious
of course we approach these life issues and others with a certain degree of seriousness which is what you are referring to here. "
Yeah, right, but are YOU serious? (Or sane?)
I know you always say you're out to provoke thought rather than to provide any answers, but since you do present yourself as an expert of sorts, it's a little frustrating not to ever know what you think, or have examples from your own experience. Drawing your own conclusions does not preclude other people from thinking. I do it all the time, and get rousing discussions on my site from people with varying viewpoints. Sometimes deliberately drawing a concrete conclusion actually provokes better thoughts and discussion.
And I agree with the others. A list of vague statements with no examples or clear conclusions leaves the reader feeling cheated.
Another practical aspect to "preparing" is to make sure that should something happen to my spouse, by either death or permanent injury, that I need to be able to earn a living and take over as the bread winner. I do not know if I could make it full time as an Artist and selling my soaps, but that is one of the things I have loved about working at home, working at my own pace.
Leslie, based on this, Bill was not talking about material/financial survival or preparation.
What I wanted to say was that it is delightful to find so very much thoughtful, perceptive, and intelligent discussion appended to a Mr. Bill article. Somehow, Bill, in spite of your self, you managed to set off a truly meaningful discussion. For that, at least, you deserve to be commended. (Better print this one out Bill. It's unlikely to happen again.)
On the subject of personal tragedy I would like to bring to everyone's attention the misfortune suffered by a brand new member of our community, named Shoukey S. Shoukey, who lives in New Jersey with 2 daughters lost her father on Thanksgiving, in Ivory Coast, Shoukey's original home. Shoukey is devastated. I posted an article yesterday trying to get support from the Gather community to contribute to buying airline tickets for Shoukey's family to go home. It seems to be languishing somewhere in a corner, since practically no one has spoken up. Here's the link:
http://www.gather.com/viewArticle.jsp?articleId=281474976849036
I also suggested, in a comment to Tom Gerace's notice that the point redemption system was back in business, that it would be nice if, somehow, those of of who wished to could contribute our points toward the same end. No response so far, and I don't really expect one. I doubt that he plans on revisiting the article. I would like to make this happen, though, somehow or other.