There are many different kinds of addictions, but one we don't hear a lot about is the addiction to chaos. A person addicted to chaos is uncomfortable when things are flowing smoothly. I used to be this way. A peaceful, smooth life had never been my norm, so when it got too peaceful, I would actually begin to crave a bit of chaos. And if no chaos came my way, I would invent my own.
Sometimes I would do something in my own life to set the ball in motion. Sometimes I would interfere in the lives of those around me to upset their peace, knowing some of it would come back to me, giving me that much needed rush.
Why I was addicted to chaos is not entirely clear. Part of the reason was that it was what I was used to. I think another reason was that if I got things stirred up enough, I could then rush in and smooth things over, becoming a sort of hero. One of the biggest reasons, I suppose, was just the rush of adrenaline that would come from stirring the pot a bit. It always made for a new bit of gossip, a bit of excitement in a day that was otherwise pretty boring.
Thank goodness I finally grew out of my chaos addiction. I've come to find peace a much more preferable option. If people need my help, generally they will ask. If people need my advice, generally they will ask. So I've learned to pretty much just mind my own business. I may not always have that adrenaline fix, but I have something much better. Blessed peace.
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Comments: 19
Good for you for growing out of it!
L.
Be still my beating heart! I haven't chatted with anyone about the enneagram in ages. Might be a 7, but maybe not, depending on other characteristics.
the being the hero you mentioned in a bigger scale is called muenchaussin,
but it could have been also attention seeking, and wanting pity for some people
self sabotaging for others who don't believe they have a right to a good life and can't handle one etc.
I have some friends like this, and a daughter who is growing out of it.
Me, I RUN from Chaos.... I crave peace and smoothe sailing. (though I do quite well in dealing with trouble of late, I HATE it. Give me serenity any day).