Holidays in the nursing home can be a time of great joy, but YOU have to make it happen. No one wants to spend their holidays alone, with virtual strangers who are not their family. Unfortunately, it is a necessity in many cases, when Granny is too ill or confused to bring home. In many cases of Dementia, Granny will not wish to leave the nursing home, so do not take offense if she doesn't. Sometimes, the outside stimuli can be overwhelming to a confused person, and she feels secure in her own little space.
Ideally, Granny CAN be brought home for the day. Sometimes an expense is involved, such as transportation, if she cannot ride in a car, or perhaps a nursing assistant to care for her while she is there.
If this is a necessity, try asking the Nursing supervisor of the home if any of the staff wants to pick up some extra cash on the holiday, if they are not working already.
Many nursing assistants these days are of faiths which do not celebrate traditional American or Judeo-Christian holidays, so you might find a willing soul to help at a more reasonable rate than a nursing agency would charge. If you do "hire help", make them feel welcome in your home, and do not try to treat them as "hired help". They will be there to meet Granny's needs, not to wash your dishes. It will make the experience more pleasant for Granny, as well as yourselves.
Most, although not all, Nursing homes strive to make the upcoming holidays as festive as possible, however, it is not home, nor will it ever be, to these folks. Most homes have traditional dinners, with all the trimmings on Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years, but what is missed most sorely at those meals is "Aunt Sue's Sweet Potatoes" or "Mommy's Fruit Salad."
In other words, those holiday traditions that make our holidays memorable. Most facilities have parties for the residents as well, although I will never understand having a New Year's Eve party at 2:00 in the afternoon.
If you cannot take Granny home for the day, please make sure you bring her a dish of her favorite home cooked treat, diet allowing.
Below is a list of things YOU can do to make Granny's "home" for the holidays as lovely as possible:
- Your Presence is much more desired than your Presents. Visit her for a few hours. Ask her for her "famous ____ recipe" Reminisce about previous holiday seasons. I stress this mostly to the folks who have a Great Aunt Jenny or Uncle Joe in a home. Their kids may already visit frequently, but your presence can mean the world to a confined person.
- Granny does not need another trinket to sit on her dresser. In most nursing homes, space is limited. Get her:
A nightgown or robe (nothing she will trip over, please)
Clothing (ask the staff for specialty stores that
cater to the disabled, or incontinent, if necessary)
Stationery and stamps (assuming she can read and write)
Sweaters (old folks are cold year round)
A magazine or newspaper subscription
A fun "talking" stuffed critter to show off to the staff ( yes, we get tired of hearing them, but we won't show it, I promise.)
Homemade treats ( check to see if Granny is on a restricted diet first)
A CD player and CD's of her favorite music
A DVD player and DVD's (install them please, as medical personnel are not the best "techies")
Take her to lunch at a favorite restaurant, or pick it up on the way, if taking her out is not possible
YOU!!!! Spending time with your loved one is the most cherished gift you can give.
A picture album or framed collage of family photos
Treats for her to share with the staff (everyone will stop in to thank her for the plate of cookies/candy you brought) *remember, there are three shifts, try not to neglect the night shift
Small decorations for her room or door, such as a tabletop tree or a door wreath.
For those of you without a loved one in a nursing home, you can help make the season brighter also.
Nursing homes are always in need of books and magazines, board games, DVDs, CDs, pleats of goodies, sweaters, lap robes (small blankets for the lap), and your time. Volunteers are always appreciated.
Happy Holidays from,
Your Granny's Nurse
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Comments: 53
Awww, now you made me go and blush....
I will have to check out your articles. Thanks!
i had a question, donna. we have lots of nursing homes around here, and i think we should visit them, but i am not sure how to go about doing it, and what we should do/bring when we get there. i DO think that it would be an excellent experience for lillie. i used to go to the nursing home all the time when i was in HS - our choir sang there weekly. ideas?
Let me know how it goes.
Thanks, y'all. It feels good to be at least a little bit back on track.
Thanks.
Thank you for commenting.
Look at my pic. Sugar, you probably are a tenth of me...lol Frankly, when I get old, I plan on being the most crotchety, feisty, funny, bawdy bitchy old biddy I can muster. Payback's a bitch!!!
I used to take my kids to a nursing home to sit and talk with the elderly. So many of those men and women just wanted to read a book to a small child--so I came prepared with a backpack full of books for them to read to the kids. It was a simple way to brighten someone's life during the holidays.
You're not kidding. Kids make even the most curmudgeonly light up like a Xmas tree.
(Jessie, I hope you're reading this...get Lillie in there!!)
Connie,
And will be remembered longer than any "thing".
Donna D,
Great idea. I envy you your talent. I have always wanted to learn needle work, like knitting and such, but I have about three left thumbs..
Every December some people from our church gather together and take some song books into one of the local nursing homes, along with a few instruments. We schedule the date ahead of time and make arrangements with the home, then we meet there for Christmas caroling. We sing, and go around and encourage the rest of the people to sing along with us, or to pick their favorite songs, and we make sure each of them gets a little treat. Afterwards we try to remain there for awhile and talk to the people who want to visit. Some leave immediately while others will sit around and talk until the nurses come to take them back to their rooms.
Sorry to hear you are feeling so disatisfied with things at your work. Hope you are able to find something to satisfy your needs.
God Love the bunch of ya!
You would do well in hospice, if you can handle it. I miss the hands-on work I had, too. I might find myself volunteering soon.
I can't say enough for the volunteers. They are some of the best people I have ever met. You will be a natural, I could bet on it. I think I can handle hospice just fine. I have dealt with dying for many years, and I have long been an advocate for compassionate end of life care.
Hopefully today will be a lovely day in Ontario, so trot 'em on down there. I suspect YOUR winters beat ours by a mile...and yes, I'm envious.
I watched my dad die in a nursing home, and my father-in-law was confined to one for a few months while he recuperated from surgery a few years ago. All you say is true, and more. I am glad for those you serve, that they have you to advocate for them.
After all this time, had no clue you were a nurse. You go girl!!!!
Tom,
...somebody's gotta do it....might as well be me.
Great article. My wife and I are planning a Christmas visit to the nursing home where her mother resides. We will make Christmas as "Christmasy" as we can for all the resident there. It is a blast to doing this, and it really is what Christmas is all about.
If more people would realize how much FUN is it, we would never have a shortage of volunteers. I just love the old folks, their stories are amazing, from both a historical standpoint, and also the humor factor.
There are so many nursing homes with many folks that have nobody to visit them. I remember when my grandma was in a nursing home, I visited as often as I could, and there would always be a group of people in wheelchairs, waiting by the door, ready to talk with anyone. I made a lot of new friends there, and even if you have nobody in a nursing home, that doesn't mean you can't have new friends and even a new family there.
Another good thing to bring, are jigsaw puzzles, for the nursing home, people enjoy getting together and doing them, especially in the winter months.
Thanks again, Donna, good luck and blessings on your job search!
Hugs,
Marilyn
Thanks again!
You folks are pretty great yourselves. Marilyn, great idea, especially those with larger pieces. Like I said above, getting to know some of these lonely old folks is immensely rewarding, both for them, and for you.
I hope you find the place you are looking for. I know there are many places that need good, loving and caring health professionals.
The "touch" therapy seems to be a big comfort to the extended care patients. That, for those who aren't familiar with it, is taking a pet into the facility and allowing the Residents to touch, hold and love on it. Of course, you need to check with the administration before doing this, but most places are thrilled to have someone visit with a pet.
Sorry, sport, in this context it means your Mother or Father's Mother.(or Father or great Aunt Henrietta) I guess I am as ignorant about basketball as you are about "Granny".
June,
We have two different groups that bring in dogs for residents to pet, and the Columbus Zoo brings in odd cuddly creatures from time to time. My last job, before this one, we had a dog, two cats , two bird aviaries, and two aquariums on site(the nuns cared for them. It was great. Thanks for the input.
Will you forgive me for forgetting our anniversary?
Thanks, my Love!!!
Thanks for your warm words.
Liz,
I didn't know wou were a gerontologist either. Small world. Thank you for your lovely sentiments.
Thank you. Some see nursing homes much the same here also. Many do not realize that nursing homes are also Rehabioitation centers to recuperate from an illness or fracture.
Thanks, Donna!
Thanks to the both of you.
Thank you. It is wonderful that you were there for your Mom. That kind of love is invaluable.