by Stephanie, proud Maw-Maw to my 2 granddaughters, G
Member since:
September 3, 2006

Paw-paw lied to me...

October 11, 2006 12:14 AM UTC
views: 0 | comments: 22

Of course it wasn't done intentionally so to speak, he was trying to avoid his family from being shunned upon in society.

See Paw-paw was a red-skinned white man (if that's possible), as was my Dad. My whole life Paw-Paw told me I was a direct descendant of Jeronimo. Up to his dying day he swore to this. I had started doing family research about 4 years ago, well after Paw-Paw's death. I never found a direct link to Jeronimo, but I wasn't even questioning that fact, because what Paw-Paw said I took to be true.

Well about 6 weeks ago my family and my uncle were cleaning out the shed at Paw-Paw's house getting it ready for sale and a picture of one of Paw-Paw's brothers caught my eye. Not quite as dark skinned as my Paw-Paw but he had definite color to his skin tone. So my uncle commented that our heritage causes the whole family line to be dark. And my comment to him was something to the effect of "that's the Indian in us coming out".

Well I almost hit the floor, not sure if it was because Paw-Paw had lied to me all my life or if the fact that I hadn't figured this out during my research. I can promise you the jaw was stuck to the floor by the time my uncle finally shut up.

"Stephanie, you are not Indian in any shape or form, you are creole." And of course my answer was something to the effect of "You might not be Indian, but I sure am, Paw-Paw told me so". Turns out, according to my uncle, Creoles were particularly shunned by society in our area of Louisiana, so to avoid his family from feeling that pain and being treated as social outcast, Paw-Paw created this fib.

So now I am not Indian, after 41 years of believing I was, I am creole descent. Does that change who I am? NO Does that change how I look at the world or the people around me in everyday life? NO But does in change something in my heart knowing that I am Creole and not Indian? I believe it does in some respects which I can't explain.

Comments: 22

Visionaerie B. Oct 11, 2006, 12:33am UTC
Be proud of your heritage -- wherever it comes from. I am mostly Dutch and German, but also Spanish and some Native American too. It's sad that prejudice exists but as a recent John Stossel special showed, more common than we realize and we just have to deal with it. So research your heritage. We have a relative in Michigan who does that for us. It sounds like you have fascinating roots, so I look forward to hearing more amazing stories about them! And maybe plant a Paw Paw or two in his honor -- for some tasty and nutritious fruits!
Jewel Hughes Oct 11, 2006, 12:35am UTC
It doesn't matter what our skin color is or what race we are. We are all human mankind and that makes us all equal.
Cena W. Oct 11, 2006, 12:38am UTC
Who are we when we aren't who we thought we were?
Carol Roach Oct 11, 2006, 12:49am UTC
I know it is hard to come to terms with a new identity, it is a shock, but you will get used it because it does not change the you in side, only the dna, but not the spirit of you.
Thanks for all the positive comments and feedback. I am still proud of who I am and that side of the family, just the knowledge after 41 years was a shocker.....
Tammy S. Oct 11, 2006, 1:18am UTC
That would be a shock, but I think I would welcome it, and find out more information. I love finding out about different cultures. I have a feeling my family has a secret, too. Hmmm, what could it be? It doen't matter to me, because I love people for who they are, not what race they belong to. :)
Marinela Kotsina Oct 11, 2006, 2:42am UTC
We are all the same
never think otherwise
you are you and you are wonderful
you are love and light at the core of your being
thank you so much for posting
Barin M. Oct 11, 2006, 7:13am UTC
Its all our mental blocks, I think so Stephenie! Because what was told day by day and then years passed! but it was believed by you! accepted by you! and you have develop a pride about that too! I think what affected you is this: you have tied up an identity of yours with certain community or race and when you found that it is not true you felt so ! there may be one reason this also that you were identified wrongly about that! but other factors are also related with that and one major factor is your ego! Here i does not mean to be an egoistic person! Rather i mean that very individualy what you believed and accepted as yourself and developed a pride of having such identity!
Well you need little spiritual ID of yours to deal with this to come out totaly and without any hammering! I will like to put it this way: ZYou have to start to heal yourself as ahuman being! try out and will find more freedom too..... !
Susan *. Oct 11, 2006, 9:00am UTC
we are all products of the "melting pot" we call the US...be proud to be American and learn more about your Creole past...perhaps PawPaw was only retelling what he thought to be true...I once had a great aunt who swore we were related to Alexander Hamilton the statesman...I've never checked to be sure but even if we aren't that doesn't change who I am today! thanks for sharing your story!
Sandra L. Oct 11, 2006, 9:15am UTC
Actually, I have a similar story. Possibly. Haven't really researched it yet. For years, we have been told that there is inian ancestry on my fathers side. His family came from Alabama, Georgia, Tennessee. One day I was talking to a cousin from Alabama on the phone. (He has a lot of experience in genealogy) I asked him what group of indians we are related to and he laughed at me. He can't find record of one indian ancestor. He has however found a couple of african-american ancestors. I said, "Well ok, but daddy looks like he's part indian" to which Michael replied,"Honey, when was the last time you saw a curly haired indian?"
That shut me up! Then we both started laughing. Bet that had those prejudiced old southerners rolling in their graves!
Dying laughing at sandra, them prejudiced people are probably still rolling over. I am very proud of our heritage, whatever it may be, it was just the total shock of learning this, 11 years after Paw-Paw died. I guess you can say I went into a system-shock or something. I am not a prejudice person, I raised a couple of African-American children when thier mom was too busy doing other things. Yes I got evil looks in the grocery stores, just because I am not prejudice, doesn't mean many of the people in this town aren't.
Larry H. Oct 11, 2006, 1:19pm UTC
I have a grandson this part African American, love the little fellow to death too. When My mother died I would have liked to have looked through the things she left behind. My half brother did that and didn't share a thing with me. Be proud of who your are.
Barin M. Oct 11, 2006, 2:05pm UTC
If you are interested then i can suggest my poem "The Song of Open Hands" to read for certain kind of expressions i have dealt in that poem wit emotional as well as humanitarian point of view!
The poen is publish and you can read it by visiting my article!
William M. Oct 11, 2006, 6:07pm UTC
It makes no difference. You are who you are. That is all that counts.
June M. Oct 11, 2006, 9:49pm UTC
You are experiencing the same feelings an adopted child can feel. Its not wrong, it is natural. Everyone seems interested in knowing what their background is, their heritage, their ancestors. If you wish to pursue this new knowledge, do not feel guilty about wanting to learn more. You are not turning your back on your family by doing this, rather enriching your own life. The Creole women were noted to be the most beautiful and gracious creatures in the U.S., if not the world. I think what caused the prejudice is that many of the women had to resort to being prostitutes or "kept women" in order to survive.
Sheri Fresonke H. Oct 14, 2006, 8:59pm UTC
I like this because it is so telling -- family's make their own history to go with what we experience. I thing being Creole could be as fun and interesting to learn about as being Indian.
Miranda Kay L. Oct 18, 2006, 3:56pm UTC
Hey, maybe your paw paw was right. Lots of creoles are of native american descent, this is america the melting pot. He might not have shared all of his heritage with you but he must have felt pride in being native and cared enough to pass that on. Although it may seem wrong and sad now, that due to unequality and racism a lot of people hid all or part of their heritage. Despite the pain of being lied too, you now have something else to be proud of. Its a very mixed emotion. I hear you when you say you feel it changes something in your heart that you can't explain. Your heritage is the basis for this article but your emotions for your paw paw may be what drives you to put thought into this subject. Reading this made me think of my grandmother who was modoc. She told me that alot of tribes had members that were escaped slaves that married in. She never believed any one who said they were 100% of their ethnic identity. So here in america it goes all ways. You probably are indian and creole and human, and alot of us humans can relate to you; your writing, your heritage and your feelings. You have shared with us that we are all unique people but we are all connected. Thanks for sharing.
Miranda Kay L. Oct 18, 2006, 4:09pm UTC
regardng your other article, I have deceased members of my family who never had birth certificates as they were born at home and not in hospitals back then. If you wanted a certificate you had to file for one. alot of people who lived away from cities never filed for them and alot of churches did not keep records or records were destroyed.
nola folse Nov 1, 2006, 11:15pm UTC
great story, I wish you luck on your fact finding expeditions.
Kathy S. Nov 16, 2006, 3:09pm UTC
I think maybe you are disappointed in your Paw-paw, but he was just doing what he thought was best at the time.
Cyndie G. May 31, 2010, 9:32pm UTC
If you go back far enough, you might find the Creoles did mix with the Native Americans. There are many creole families that did so. There were so many small tribes throughout Louisiana. There's a particular group called Redbones who are multi-ethnic. Some do have Choctaw ancestry.

Join the Conversation
Chime in! Become a Gather member to comment.
Already a member? Sign in
top
 
Gather | Friends | Groups | Share
About Gather | Engagement Marketing | Gather Points | Advertise on Gather | Gather Press | Privacy | Terms of Service | Community Guidelines
Books | Business | Celebs | Entertainment | Family | Food | Giveaways | Health | Money | Moms | News | Politics | Sports | Style | Technology | Travel | Writing
Version 18247, "Zach"; Copyright © 2013 Gather Inc. All rights reserved.