by Ron Hall
Member since:
August 31, 2005

Ten Whines for Whine Collectors

October 06, 2006 05:52 PM EDT
views: 43 | comments: 15

1) "It's hot out.  Put the thermostat on 60. I hate it when it's so hot outside.  And humid.  Don't get me started on humid."

 

2) "I'm not going to vote for my party until they start winning some elections.  They're such losers."

 

3) "Why can't I bring a concealed weapon into church?"

 

4) "Damn it's cold. Put the thermostat on 80."

 

5) "Why do I have to pay any taxes?"

 

6) "Where's a cop when you need one?"

 

7) (Yelling out car window in a traffic jam that stretches out of sight) "Hey, move it, you idiots!"

 

8) (Whining at the passenger next to him) "You hear this idiot yelling behind us?  What, he thinks he can yap and it'll make all the world's annoyances go away.  You know, I've got half a mind to go back there and give him a piece of my mind, but people like that you can't . . . [whine, whine, whine]"

 

9) "I was outside just now, and it RAINED.  Can you believe it?  God hates me, I know it.  It's the only explanation I can come up with."

 

10) "Is it dry in here?  Does it seem dry to you.  I think it's dry."

 

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I bet you thought I misspelled wine.  No, I collect whines.  Do you have any lying around?  Share them with us.  Please.  Thank you.

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Comments: 15

Diana Raabe Oct 6, 2006, 6:05pm EDT
"I'm not thirsty; why on earth do you need a glass of water?"
John S. (arizona) Oct 6, 2006, 6:09pm EDT
"I'm bored." ......"I don't want to do that."........"I hate that!".........."I'm bored." ......."That's boring too." ........."Forget it, you don't understand!"..........> KIDS
~~ Sarina ~~ Oct 6, 2006, 6:23pm EDT
It is hot outside....swim in the pool....is it heated?
Dave Neukirch Oct 6, 2006, 6:53pm EDT
I've found that most whines come in the form of "too" It's too hot, too cold, too windy, too late, too far away, etc... You get the idea. I could go on but I have too much to do tooooday.
Ron Hall Oct 6, 2006, 7:15pm EDT
All very respectable whines, folks. And yes, Dave, I think the best whiners have too much of something. Those with not enough have a more mature attitude towards life. Is the pool heated (I like that). Nice kid immitation, John. Diana, your's is an interesting twist (I like the self-centered tone - vintage whiner).
Auntie Smedley Oct 6, 2006, 7:20pm EDT
Do I hafta take out the garbage?

Whaddayamean, get off the computer?

It's not fair! I ALWAYS have to clean the litter boxes!
Ron Hall Oct 6, 2006, 8:21pm EDT
Clean litter boxes! XXX Ack. I got into the habit of gathering up beer flats and putting cat litter in them. Then, when it was time I' d put the whole thing in a bag and throw it out. Oh, man do I hate to clean a litter box. Do I? No way! Can't we hire a maid or butler or something? Where are all these people who want to take my job? My job is cleaning the litter box. Take my job. Please.
Kate S. Oct 6, 2006, 10:58pm EDT
"I have a headache"
"I don't feel good"
"I'm tired"
"But I don't wanna do________"
"Do I have to________________?"
"Why can't you take the laundry down/up?"
"Well you never told me to_______________"
Imagine all of these in my husband's voice (sounds like that of annoying six year old boy).
I usually ask him if he would like some cheese with that whine or i start playing my very tiny sad sounding violin.
Ron Hall Oct 6, 2006, 11:04pm EDT
Oh, laundry now. You'd think maybe they'd invent a self laundering pair of jeans, but no. I guess they must wear out faster if they're done by hand. That must be it. I spend all my spare time doing laundry. I haul it up to the laundry room and then back to our flat (also uphill). Oy, the toil. The agony I suffer at the hands of my own clothes. They don't like me. That's the worst thing.
Carol Roach Oct 7, 2006, 2:23am EDT
why always me? why do I always have to do it?

why does he she get to do it and never me?

why can't you call me more often?

why don't you take me out, buy me stuff, pay attention to me sometimes

why are you always on my case

why does it always rain on the weekends and its a beautiful sunny day when you have to work?

why is everything so expensive

why wasn't I born rich?
Ron Hall Oct 7, 2006, 9:36am EDT
Oooooo. The last two are quality whines if I've ever seen them. I'll refrain from going into a rant, but those are gems. Gems, Carol.

Janie and I don't have kids, and didn't come from large families, so a lot of the others don't resonate so much. And it's a beautiful fall day with tons of yard sales awaiting. I'll try hard to find something to whine about. If I find it, I'll be sure to report back . . .
Rhonda *TheTightwad* S. Oct 8, 2006, 11:00am EDT
"It's not fair! I ALWAYS have to clean the litter boxes!"
What, have you been to my house lately? I hear this whine everyday, added to by my son "I don't even like the cats?"
Ron Hall Oct 8, 2006, 11:30am EDT
Oh, wow. Not liking cats and having to clean the cat box. That must generate a truly collectible whine. I can hear a Cartmanesque voice going, "Maaaaa-AAAA-oooom!"
Jewel Hughes Oct 8, 2006, 1:37pm EDT
My grandchildren have alot of them LOL
Ron Hall Oct 8, 2006, 2:14pm EDT
Thanks for stopping by, Jewel.

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