Just a Journal Post. Please Ignore Me.

Horrific. My car got towed, and then the shit really hit the fan. I was thinking, originally, about 100$ to get it out. And I payed that. But no,for a while, I was thinking maybe more like 800$, which would have meant me having to leave the city, or ignoring the fact that I have a mortgage to pay. Or both. Fuckin city. Burn, Bitch, Burn.

But it all got sorted out on Friday. I got all my shit together, got the car reinsured, reregistered, payed the storage, and got it out on the streets with enough time to visit "She Who Bends Time" at the 'bucks at the Weston and get down to Cambridgeside to meet the staff for our summer party. It was a cruise in Boston harbor, with a cashbar and catered. My coworker Jackie (who is incredible) was buying drinks faster than we could suck them down, and I was going full tilt like the charming asshole I am. All in all, an incredible evening, and the city looked just gorgeous, almost as gorgeous as whatshername 1, or whatshername 2.

.....................

In my mind, my sky at twilight you are a cloud and your form and colour deep amber red, and the way I love them. You are mine?

Mine, oh! woman with sweet lips and in your life my infinite dreams live. How you dance in my thoughts

The BONFIRE! I sing my soul elextrix. You, I shed tears wanting you.

Fire of my soul dyes your pink breasts, sweet legs,

My sour wine is sweeter on your lips, breath, oh reaper of my evening song, sweet her that crushes me, how solitary dreams believe you to be mine!

I go screaming, aloud, it to the evening's wind, and the wind hauls on my widowed, impotent voice. You haunt me, in the depths of my eyes, your plunder stills your nocturnal regard as though it were water.

You are taken in the net of my music, my sweet sweet woman, and my nets of music are wide as the sky. My soul is born on the shore of your eyes of mourning.

Then went to work at 7 am the next morning, and man, was that some nostalgia.

I am going to NYC for the New Yorker Festival, and am looking forward to it more than anything. I have a bad history with trips to NYC, starting all the way back in the days of John and Alex, and the ride to Phili that took 12 freakin hours.

There is a lot of strife going on, and I am presently in the center of it, though the cause of none of it. I have a lot to say on the matter, but because all the people involved are my friends, and I am a polite individual, I will reserve my words for in person meetings and whispered telephone conversations in the dark of night, as is my want.

I have a lot on my plate right now, and I am slowly beginning to realize that this summer turning to fall has changed a lot of things for me, has changed a lot about me. BEing completely head over heals for her has been good for me, in a lot of ways. It ended the monastacism of long hours, long weeks, and drinking alone at Porter Belly's or the Middle East. But it also ended my being financially comfortable (because maintaining now 2 houses ain't cheap!), and now I am frantically searching for supplements to my income. I feel like a lot of my life was just lost in that emptiness, and I'm only now rediscovering it. If it takes being broke to be this happy, then I'll switch beers for martinis and burn dollars in the furnace. Just don't let me get so far gone as to have to move home. I can't do that.

I'm a bit rambly, I know that.

(4) at c:/memories/nauvogoddess.txt

Traced in the old copper.
Blue, but stolen
   from the magnets blue,
  left in the sod; so, aged now.

 Turned in your fingers,
a humming came into your throat
  and grows there
      while the shape emerges.

    The limber force in a stone's attraction.
   Some other planet
     where's a light across the plain
     in stereo fashioned after
     her dance fell in traces
    into the fallen timber.

These fluctuations charge.change the
draped remnants of her black dress
that She picked out, and
there is no time in it.
A machine all energy and desire
    and broken blades twisted,
   loose again and handled by
    the thick flood's unwinding.
   Leave the elements to their work
   and the change remains.