With the big eight-one come and gone, I can't help but think about what's coming next. Hopefully, a few more birthdays, but there can't be many, and with this in mind, I've finally begun to think about disposition of the "earthly remains".
Frankly, I'm annoyed that I have so few options. It seems my only choices are burial, cremation, or donation to a medical school. Of course, I hope there will be a few usable parts that can be cut and pasted to another human who needs them, but what about the leftovers?
I know that the matter and energy of which my current conformation is composed will continue to exist, in one form or another, as it has always existed. And I know that it will eventually return to the infinite cosmic store to be recycled once again. What I want is a choice of ways to get it there, other than decomposition underground or by a quick flash of heat, light and ashes in a roaring furnace.
What I truly desire is to be made into catfood and given to my three little fur-buddies. I think it would be wonderful to actually become part of their growth and nature. The thought of evolving into cat-hood through consumption is very pleasing to me. To know that "my" protein will survive by nourishing my little companions delights me. Sure, I'll turn into cat shit eventually, but what the hell. It'll still be part of the planet.
Unfortunately, there seems to be no way to expedite this desire. I am wondering, however, what would happen if I left final instructions that my remains are to be kit and kaboodled and shipped off to Purina for processing. I bet the ensuing legal battle would make a great script for "Boston Legal"... I'd love to see Captain Kirk deal with it.
So anyhow, I'd very much appreciate some alternate suggestions as to the most efficient way to recycle the stuff "I" currently inhabit. All comments will be voraciously and gratefully ingested. And the first person who says "Solent Green" will receive a box of lime Oreos.
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Comments: 13
I also like the notion of being tossed into the African jungle, to be feasted upon by lions and tigers and vutures, oh my. How exciting to be part of a wild thing...maybe become a lioness' roar. Or an eagle's feather. But I'd still prefer to be a cat's purr. How about you?
"MANNHEIM, Germany (CNN) -- At Mannheim's Museum of Technology and Labor, an exhibit gives us the real inside story.
On display are corpses without skin -- artful, eerie sculptures of the lifeless. A rare peek inside the human body that provides insight into the strength, beauty and fragility of people.
The corpses are preserved with injections of plastic by a process invented by Dr. Gunther von Hagens, the curator.
Exhibit highlights
When the cadaver hardens, the body parts keep the same shape and color as when they were alive.
The exhibit is so popular that on a recent cold Saturday, 10,000 people waited patiently, as long as five hours, to see the bodies."
As for becoming a human popsicle, I don't think I want to be thawed out sometime in the future just to start over as an old lady again. Once is enough for that conformation.
Someone once suggested going the Snow White route: burial in a crystal bier until Prince C. comes along to wake me with a kiss. That might be okay for me, but can you imagine the poor prince getting a whiff of that hundred-year-old morning breath? Eeewwww!
The one redeeming factor (for me) was how well it illustrated the effects of smoking on the human body. It was quite easy to tell by their lungs which of the models were smokers and which were non smokers.
The exhibit may have more appeal for those without a science background. I suspect that I became desensitized to anatomy from all the dissection and anatomy models I viewed in pursuit of my biology degree.
But seriously, I'm with Fletcher here..... This article was down right funny! From 100 year old morning breath to becoming kitty kibble, I was grinning from ear to ear!
If you figure something out, Ruth, do please let us know!